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Originally Posted by Megley
I think if you get the kids to want to please you, you will do better than if they can't stand you. Just my 2 cents, though.
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That pretty much sums up my thoughts on the matter as well, though I would add that I think it's best if the kids see themselves as doing it not just for the coach, but for themselves as well; in other words, they need to enjoy challenging themselves.
Abusive coaches do exist. They are not, from what I've seen, the norm, but they are more common than they should be (obviously).
I think there is an important point to be made here about the parents' responsibilities; parents need to be willing to ask their kids if they have fun at practice, and they need to be willing to listen to the answer. A distubring number of parents won't do this.
The primary responsibility of a good coach, as I see it, is simply to see that the kids are having fun and staying safe. Some coaches fail to do this.
However, after saying this, I want to emphasize again just how great gymnastics can be for a kid if they work with a good coach; that is, one who challenges them but keeps them within the limits of what is safe. One who can push the kids to get better while still making the sport fun for them.