Parents Balancing fun with advancement

[rbearclaw]

Honestly, in elementary school, I wouldn't sweat it and I'm a teacher. My DD's elementary school is VERY nonsupportive of her gymnastics. They wouldn't tolerate leaving early and she takes an unexcused absence every single time we have to travel for a meet.

I prepared a huge report one year showing how her trip met and exceeded the educational standards when she was in the 3rd grade. Her principal said no but that I could appeal. The board office omsbudsman said she always sides with the principal (that's NOT an omsbudsman!), and I eventually took it up to the superintendent.

Because that person is technically my boss, I stopped after an after hours phone call from her. She basically told me that the unexcused versus excused just isn't really an issue and that as long as she was a strong student who made up missed work, it just wasn't worth the battle I was waging.

I guess my opinion is based on that conversation. As long as your daughter is given the work and can stay caught up, this early in her educational career, the excused versus unexcused just doesn't matter. I get my "habitual truant" letter every year (our kids can have a total of 5 absences/tardies for the year) but I never get a court referral or even a call from the board office. So for us, there really doesn't seem to be a true consequence as long as I can let go that I don't think it's fair that she has to take the unexcused.

That is very helpful, thank you!!!

 

[MILgymFAM]

I would say your mileage may vary. We have gotten pulled into referrals/court in two separate states for "truancy" related to both extra curriculars and personal family stuff, and my kids have always been excellent students. Often times now, it's simply about the money and they need the kids in the seats to get paid. I am not saying you will have our problems, but I wouldn't presume it to not be a big deal either.

 

[twinmomma]

I get the letter too. We are "that family" that takes our kids out of school for vacation because my wife is law enforcement and doesn't get traditional time off nor does she have control over when she gets vacation time (annual bid process/seniority). So far, we've only had one meet that caused absences (Xcel Regionals last year) and I just didn't even bother trying to explain. I just take the letter and toss it in the trash. I have two strong students (3rd graders) and I just don't stress it at the moment.

That said, the teachers themselves have been exceptionally supportive of both my kids and our family situation when it comes to being out of town. Two weeks before our scheduled vacation we had to be out of town for a week for a funeral (12 hour drive) and they didn't even require them to do the homework for that week. So, I think up until this point we've been rather lucky with the school situation. The letters are automatic to kids with a certain number of absences so it is what it is.

 

[Alie21]

I get my "habitual truant" letter every year (our kids can have a total of 5 absences/tardies for the year)

Wow, that doesn't seem like many days. I'm probably absent from my paid work more days than that in a year...thanks kids for all those colds and flu's!

I just checked the departments website and in Australia, Principals can "grant an exemption from school attendance for periods totalling up to 100 days in a 12 month period for any one student provided certain conditions are met"

One of the conditions is "for students wishing to participate in employment in the entertainment industry or participation in elite arts or sporting events." I must admit I find the entertainment industry one rather puzzling!!! These conditions have just been tightened I believe. You used to be able to take overseas holidays as an 'explained absence' just for the asking!

Anyhow, thought you all may be interested in the 'little differences"

 

[MILgymFAM]

We get three absences in our district before the truant letters start. It's all so over the top IMO.

 

[COz]

I just checked the departments website and in Australia, Principals can "grant an exemption from school attendance for periods totalling up to 100 days in a 12 month period for any one student provided certain conditions are met"

One of the conditions is "for students wishing to participate in employment in the entertainment industry or participation in elite arts or sporting events." I must admit I find the entertainment industry one rather puzzling!!! These conditions have just been tightened I believe. You used to be able to take overseas holidays as an 'explained absence' just for the asking!

Yep.
Kids who are in theatre performances, ballet etc. get this time off.
Some ballet kids take one day off a week to ease themselves into a full time ballet program before switching to distance education (dropping out of traditional high school) to do ballet full time.

Even without this, Australian schools seem far more accommodating and flexible than what seems to be common in the US. It is generally pretty easy (as in, you just ask) to leave school 15 minutes early each day to get to gymnastics. It is generally easy to have a half day off school a week for a half day of gymnastics that is scheduled in school time.

 

[gymmomtotwo]

I have an 8 year old just finished level 4, now training 5 who will probably do 5 next fall and Level 7 next spring. She trains approximately 18 hours per week. She is enrolled at a regular Catholic parochial elementary school. She gets out of school 1/2 hour early one day a week to make it to practice on time that day, with no resistance from the school. She still has time to play, have sleepovers (with gym and school friends), a one half hour ice skating lesson once a week for fun and Brownies. I honestly don't understand why kids would need to be home schooled for these numbers of hours. She goes 4 days a week, the other 3 are free for the most part. It seems to work quite well, though as homework increases as she gets older it will get more challenging. Can your daughter do more hours without altering her school situation? That would be a good place to start. As she gets older, homeschooling may make more sense, but I would think a level 3/4/5 would be able to up her hours from 12 without withdrawing from school. We have a large Level 10 team of girls who all attend school. We have a couple each year who get gymnastics scholarships. It can be done

 

[Seeker]

We get three absences in our district before the truant letters start. It's all so over the top IMO.

That is ridiculous. That is one illness or death in the family.

 

[Seeker]

I have an 8 year old just finished level 4, now training 5 who will probably do 5 next fall and Level 7 next spring. She trains approximately 18 hours per week. She is enrolled at a regular Catholic parochial elementary school. She gets out of school 1/2 hour early one day a week to make it to practice on time that day, with no resistance from the school. She still has time to play, have sleepovers (with gym and school friends), a one half hour ice skating lesson once a week for fun and Brownies. I honestly don't understand why kids would need to be home schooled for these numbers of hours. She goes 4 days a week, the other 3 are free for the most part. It seems to work quite well, though as homework increases as she gets older it will get more challenging. Can your daughter do more hours without altering her school situation? That would be a good place to start. As she gets older, homeschooling may make more sense, but I would think a level 3/4/5 would be able to up her hours from 12 without withdrawing from school. We have a large Level 10 team of girls who all attend school. We have a couple each year who get gymnastics scholarships. It can be done

Enjoy it while it lasts....homework and school demands increase greatly as they move up into the middle school grades and the gymnastics gets a lot harder, so even if your hours don't change, the toll it takes might.

 

[Quadqueen]

It does get difficult, but the 10s at DD's gym all attend public school as well, and are doing fine.

 

[gymmomtotwo]

Enjoy it while it lasts....homework and school demands increase greatly as they move up into the middle school grades and the gymnastics gets a lot harder, so even if your hours don't change, the toll it takes might.

I hear ya. I was an elite swimmer practicing twice a day for 30 hours a week going to a regular high school. It was exhausting, but so worth it. Swimming in college was the best! Lifelong friends and incredible memories. We will see if DD feels the same, or if her life takes a different path. It is totally up to her. When she refused to be a swimmer, I knew the whole deal was in her hands. Now I can't live vicariously through her.... In the meantime, she will continue with regular school where no one cares a bit about her gymnastics and she is just a regular kid.

 

[MILgymFAM]

That is ridiculous. That is one illness or death in the family.

I am sorry, I should have been more clear. That's three unexcused absences. Sickness more than two days straight without a dr note, funeral (or grieving) over one day. Pardon my vagueness.

Although any lateness or leaving early in excess of 10 minutes counts as an absence.

 

[momnipotent]

I know some will not agree with this, but if my kid was to be out 3-4 days for a camp/training, I would just take the whole week and get an independent study contract-as long as the work gets completed, it's counted as an excused absence. And the whole truant thing is silly for kids who otherwise have good attendance-even the attendance secretary at my school says she doesn't understand why parents don't just call their kids in sick when they take off for long weekends.

 

[anothergymmom]

One difficulty about trying to decide what is fun for your child is that what is fun often changes over time. My daughter was one of those girls who wanted to be in the gym ALL THE TIME at 8 or 9. Wanted to go to every open gym; would have signed up for extra hours if she could. Made all sorts of dramatic statements about how "gymnastics is my life!" And most of her gym friends were exactly the same way. Fast forward: she is 12. She thinks her current hours at the gym are more than enough. Hasn't gone to open gym for at least a year. Is exhausted all the time between growth spurts and increased schoolwork. I think she is ambivalent about gym now. And this is a kid who loves conditioning and is insanely hardworking. She still loves it, but she also feels overwhelmed by all the demands on her. I'm not sure if her gym friends feel the same because, honestly, we see them less than we used to because she is too tired and busy to see them outside the gym. Now she really wants to relax.

When I worried, years ago, that my dd was too committed to gym (I worried that it would interfere with school; this has not been the case in fact), a wise friend told me that it was important for kids to have something meaningful in their lives outside of school--a place that gave them a different identity from the one they had in school. This has proven very true for my dd and I am very grateful to gymnastics for it. But I would think the same would be true for the gym. As another poster mentioned, it is important for them to have something meaningful outside the gym too, a place they don't have to be a gymnast. Of course they can find that in many different ways.

 

[Seeker]

I am sorry, I should have been more clear. That's three unexcused absences. Sickness more than two days straight without a dr note, funeral (or grieving) over one day. Pardon my vagueness.

Although any lateness or leaving early in excess of 10 minutes counts as an absence.

I still think it's ridiculous . (Thankfully we homeschool and I'm in charge!!)