Parents Confused and I just have to ask...

[lilgymmie7]

I just need to ask...Why do some parents have that unending desire to tell another parent what will happen 'gymnastically' with their child? I mean, why do they feel they need to 'clue' you in with what will happen with your own child. I have heard a few times from the same parent what level my DD will compete next year. Of course, I will continue to listen to her coaches and not the parents, but this really confuses me. I think part of me believes that she is trying to make herself feel better, for what I am not altogether sure. But if I have to hear, "I told my DD, if she is put with the 'first' year level 5's, she will never work on her level 6 skills." one more time... I have not heard her make these comments to anyone else but me. As far as I know, DD is considered a 'first' year because it is her first year at USAG 5, but this kid of mine is working 6 and beyond skills EVERY day. What I love about DD's gym is that they do push the girls at their own individual pace.
I have tried to empress this factor to this parent, but man oh man is she persistant. I think it is wearing on her poor DD as well. I'm not really looking to go 'anywhere' with this misconceived parent, but I just thought to ask if anyone has ever experienced this same thing/issue. Why can't parents just be happy for their own child and her/his teammates? Why do they have to offer info. as if it really mattered? It is somewhat sad really...

 

[mumoftwogymnasts]

I think with some people it is just the nature of the beast... and it doesn't only happen with gymnastics .... Ipod and earplugs

 

[Granny Smith]

Jealousy will make people say crazy things!

 

[UnoMas]

I know someone like this, too. My advice is to change the subject. Start talking about upholstery recovering or something.

 

[bogwoppit]

I guess all you can say is "it's nothing to do with me, I pay the coaches and they decide, then they do we'll all know, until that time let's talk about the oil crisis and other more important things!"

Sadly this will happen constantly no matter what gym you are in, in fact it happens in school at the beach etc. Competitive parents just knock the fun out of life for everyone.

 

[Pineapple_Lump]

Suggest that the parent inform the coaches since they clearly know about your child see where that gets them.

 

[my4buffaloes]

I know someone at my gym who says stuff like this to me all the time. Each childs' path is different in gymnastics and this random parent doesn't now what will happen with her own kid, much less other kids. I just let them talk, nodding my head and not saying much. I don't know differently so what is the point of arguing?

 

[Deleted member D3987]

I know someone like this, too. My advice is to change the subject. Start talking about upholstery recovering or something.

hahahaha......upholstery or something................hahahahahaha...i wet myself laughing............LOL!

 

[lilgymmie7]

hahahaha......upholstery or something................hahahahahaha...i wet myself laughing............LOL!

Okay dunno...every time I think I have you figured out...You give me something to go"Huh?" You must be a trip on the gym floor! "Say that again Coach!!"

 

[lilgymmie7]

I know someone at my gym who says stuff like this to me all the time. Each childs' path is different in gymnastics and this random parent doesn't now what will happen with her own kid, much less other kids. I just let them talk, nodding my head and not saying much. I don't know differently so what is the point of arguing?

I totally agree and might I add...I can't MAKE my kids do anything by way of gymnastics, etc. I gave birth to three very strong willed little beings!!

 

[lilgymmie7]

Suggest that the parent inform the coaches since they clearly know about your child see where that gets them.

I just had to say, I really needed that laugh! Thanks!!

 

[lilgymmie7]

Sadly this will happen constantly no matter what gym you are in, in fact it happens in school at the beach etc. Competitive parents just knock the fun out of life for everyone.

That is the "IT" factor exactly! Can we just all make this our mantra? In this way maybe all will be cognizant. I am competitive, but money has to be involved...Only thing is I know nothing about gambling!

 

[Blackie6]

I've said it before and I will say it again...dump and run. Those that hang out too much during their daughter's practice spend way too much time worrying about this stuff. There is little time to listen as you are running in to pick up your daughter at the end of practice, LOL. The important thing is that you know the plan is from the coach. In a couple years, these parents have either moved on to other gyms, kids left the sport, or realize that being a sideline coach in the parent area really does not pay off.

 

[MdGymMom01]

I totally agree with Blackie's approach. I also follow the "dump and run" approach. I totally trust my dd's coach and know that if there is an issue of any kind (or a new skill that dd wants to show me) then coach will seek me out at pick up time to discuss or let me go out in the gym to watch the new skill. It's great!!! There is no need to really sit and watch the practices because most of the time they are doing the same skills that they have been doing all along with maybe some added uptraining.

The danger of watching too much practice is that you get a biased or faulty view of the progression. You see a lot of conditioning, you may see some new cool skills executed very well, and some old skills executed very poorly. By seeing a lot happening, it opens your mind up to a lot of drama from other parents and emotions which can run from excited, happy, sad, frustrated, worried and angry. We all want to know that our kids are progressing and they ALL WILL, in THEIR OWN TIME. So, by not watching practice, you eliminate all this unnecessary "drama and emotional baggage" that occurs and develops.

You've all hear the expression "a watched pot never boils." Well, I'll take that a step further. Watching practices all the time is like watching water boil with varying degrees of heat. The end result is the same. The water WILL boil. It just may take a little longer, that's all .

 

[bogwoppit]

I have done the dump and run for years and I have to say it works great even if I have to find stuff close to the gym to do in order not to waste money. Sitting at the gym just means you have to hear such BS. the viewing area is a breeding ground for lunatics.

 

[Tumblequeensmom]

I definitely "dump and run" too!!! Too many crazies hanging out in the gym..... one woman constantly "tracks me down" to talk about her DD's "issues." I always tell her to talk to the coach!!! Geeze....

 

[NewtoGym]

I LOVE the "Dump and Run"! It has changed my experience with my daughter's gymnastics! So much better!!!

 

[NGL780309]

There is always the slight possibility, though doubtful, that the mom is trying to make friends and maybe gymnastics is all she can find to talk about. I'm always trying to see the other side, like maybe they didn't mean it that way. Sometimes if there is a mom I don't know very well I might ask a question related to their kids gym just to get a conversation started. It's probably doubtful. Also maybe she's just curious, but then again I'd ask someone, not tell them my opinion if I was curious.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

i have done the dump and run for years and i have to say it works great even if i have to find stuff close to the gym to do in order not to waste money. Sitting at the gym just means you have to hear such bs. The viewing area is a breeding ground for lunatics.

preach! ^^^

 

[Krystan]

I know I am new here and have already been on the receiving end of major condescension while just asking for input & support, but I can't resist. I completely understand the "dump and run" mentality. It is too easy to get emotionally wrapped up in your child's practice if you stay all the time. But I find that people on this list are very nasty and judgmental of parents that enjoy staying to watch gymnastics practices - in this way they are just as bad as the ultra-competitive parent. There are plenty of non-psychotic reasons a parent may stay. Maybe they live too far away, maybe they have dds with anxiety issues that insist they stay when they've changed levels, maybe it is the only time in the darn day where they get to sit in one place, put their feet up, and read a book. Maybe they enjoy watching gymnastics, seeing their child progress. And maybe they don't blindly trust their coach/gym yet (especially if they are new), hear something going on from dd, and want to keep an eye on things. They are paying, and it is their child, after all. I get that you don't want to become too involved/wrapped up. That's why when I go I bring a good book or a complicated knitting project. I try to hit a practice every other week or so, and I've had all of the above reasons in the past.

I just think that if you would like to have a supportive message board, you need to stop being so judgmental toward a decent percentage of people that could probably use your support (and not your ridicule) to help them get past this phase or see the big picture. I am not in any way condoning the mean-spirited comments of the type mentioned by the OP! That sort of thing is irritating and happens in all kinds of parents of all walks of life. Sounds like you are handling it well though!