Gymnastics news...Thoughts? (Don Peters)

[NewtoGym]

Just read the following article. Sad if it is true.
1984 Olympic gymnastics coach accused of abuse, report says - ESPN

 

[MayDay]

I hope things get sorted out accordingly!

 

[cher062]

Unfortunatly once accused people believe no matter how it turns out.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

ugh...talk with your children. not here on this site. everyone in gymnastics that needs to know about this are already aware and it's being handled. ugh.

 

[NewtoGym]

ugh...talk with your children. not here on this site. everyone in gymnastics that needs to know about this are already aware and it's being handled. ugh.

I am getting confused what I can talk about on this site lately! lol
This was new news to me! Thought this was relevant news.

 

[bogwoppit]

It is news, but as we do have a huge membership in the 13-18 range we do have to be careful about what we allow as a discussion topic.

I think Dunno is saying that an issue like this is not something most parents would want their kids to learn about on the internet.

The authorities are dealing with the issue.

 

[JBS]

I have already gotten a couple of requests to discuss this. How do you feel about discussing this on this site knowing that there are minors here? Please go ahead and weigh in.

It is currently national news which minors also have access to.

EDIT: Let refrain from discussing it at this time though. Just give us your opinion about how a topic like this fits into the site. The article is there to read on another site.

 

[bogwoppit]

This is the perfect instance where private group would fill a niche here on the CB.

Perhaps "Adults only chalktalk".

Also this is National news in the USA, but it certainly is not international news.

 

[gymmomntc2e6]

i understand the hesitation however, I think it could be used as a tool to help parents (not just gym moms & dads but for all sports & activites where our children are exposed to strangers) discuss thus with their children. what to do if something happens. Who to tell. what is & isn't ok. How USAG & other organizations handle allegations/investigations etc.

It is a sensative topic, and one nobody even likes to think about. If discussing it here helps even one child, isn't it worth it?

 

[AlexsGymmyMom]

i understand the hesitation however, I think it could be used as a tool to help parents (not just gym moms & dads but for all sports & activites where our children are exposed to strangers) discuss thus with their children. what to do if something happens. Who to tell. what is & isn't ok. How USAG & other organizations handle allegations/investigations etc.

It is a sensative topic, and one nobody even likes to think about. If discussing it here helps even one child, isn't it worth it?

I have always talked openly with my kids about these types of dangers! The hard part is that these kids learn to truly trust these coaches with their life and then to be exploited! Disgusting!!

 

[JBS]

Very interesting opinions here so far. I can't say that I disagree with anyone. Let's hear some more opinions on whether or not this should be discussed here knowing that minors are members.

 

[Empowered]

In the United States (no idea what other countries have access to in terms of US cable shows) at this time the ABC "Family" channel currently features the following shows:

Secret Life - Ridiculous farce about a teenager who has a baby that to me only glorifies teen pregnancy and ***
Make It or Break It - Even more ridiculous farce about elite gymnasts (really just a teen soap about *** where they happen to be gymnasts)
Pretty Little Liars, The Hamptons - Teenage Soap Operas all about ***, revenge, etc.

Again this is on what is billed as a family channel. Flash over to Noggin and you get more of the same with shows like Degrassi which although it attempts to have a positive message, portrays pre-teens and teens as *** obsessed, party animals. This is what our children are inundated with... Day in and day out and this is just the fiction.

So here now we have a REAL LIFE situation, and an opportunity to teach and educate about the cruel reality that stuff like this happens, and it happens more often than I would care to know. All posters on this site are supposed to be 13 or older and thus I think they are more capable of reading and handling a news article like this.

That being said, I also think this is an opportunity to express to the young and old alike on this site that situations like this are not always what they seem and sometimes innocent people end up with ruined lives because of an over zealous and often careless media. Look at the Duke Lacrosse players situation where 5 upstanding young college athletes nearly had their lives ruined by what turned out to be a lie.

So while I think it's okay to post the article, I think pages of posts made with an assumption of guilt or innocence or ruining of a person's life and reputation without knowing all of the facts does no good.

That's my two cents and I swear I won't be offended if everyone disagrees with me

 

[bogwoppit]

Sharks that is kind of where I am at with the whole thing. I am talking as the mom of two teens girls here.

I am a member on GGMB and let me tell you after reading 9 pages of discussion of this article on their site I would not want it copied and pasted here. The article and the subject are one thing, but the emotional fall out I have seen their is huge. I am not talking about angry, screaming name calling fallout, I am talking about raw human pain.

I am not sure if that could be handled as well by some 13 year olds.

For me if it came on the news I would take the opportunity to discuss the dangers of being vulnerable, and the fact that strangers are not the real danger most of the time. But to have the whole issue hashed out in front of my kid here, I am not so sure.

It is always going to be a tough call with topics that are sensitive, as we are also making choices for the kids that lurk here who are underage too. I know there are LOTS.


P.S. GGMB is an adults only gym gossip board. Closed to the public too.

 

[Empowered]

Maybe there is a compromise where the article could be posted in an area where comments are disabled?

 

[GymGirl's Mom]

I think this is exactly the kind of topic to be discussed on here. Members aged 13-18 are not too young to hear about and discuss these kinds of topics.

 

[flipper's fan]

It all depends on where the discussion goes. I have no problem talking about this kind of issue with 13-18 year olds- I think it's necessary. Dear Abby said if you haven't talked to your kids about *** by age 11, someone else has. I certainly don't think it should be the place for people to come out with their own pain and secrets- a message board is not adequate to respond to someone who needs protection, law enforcement, and therapy.

 

[MayDay]

I do not see an issue with this being posted. When you go to Yahoo! it scrolls the news for you and sometimes you will find adult related topics. Do you have to click them, no, but they are there. Maybe an *adult content* label would be sufficient enough, and posting links to full articles, etc.

 

[coachmolly]

I think it's important to make parents and gymnasts aware that these kinds of things happen, much more frequently than anyone would like to recognize, and how to deal with it. Not talking about these types of things at all is what creates that atmosphere of shame and discomfort when something awful like this does happen, children feeling like they are the only person going through such a situation and absolutely mortified to tell anyone.
I agree that delving in to speculations, name calling, etc. is unnecessary for this board. But an open discussion of how to deal with these types of situations- prevent them, red flags, and whatnot could be productive.

 

[gymcoach26]

I feel like such articles are okay to post on here. Children have access to this information on the news and from other internet sources so to me it shouldn't be something we have to censor. It is sad and unfortunate that these things happen, but as someone else said, if it could help even one child, I think it's worth it.

Bog, I understand what your saying about the emotional fallout, yet I think you are comparing apples to oranges. What you have described, compared to the CB are two completely different sites. One that is an Adult only, gossip site that is closed to the public (people may feel more comfortable posting whatever they want) or one that has child members and is not (or working to not be ) a gossip site.

 

[SkiBumGymMom]

I'm on the other end of the spectrum, I don't think members 13-18 are too young to hear about it. Ultimately it's a decision let up to the teen's parents, but for my own kids, I would want them to hear about this from a legitimate supportive place (like CB) and then discuss it with me. I trust the CB and know it's well moderated. I think the proper contextualization is important for these sorts of issues. If just the link were posted, it's no different than a teen googling it then discussing it with their friends in gym class where it can get twisted into something far worse if that makes sense.

I also think it's important for teens to be aware of this kind of behavior, after all it's happening to them and I believe knowledge is power. 13-18 is more or less high schoolers with a few 8th graders and a few grads thrown in. While they're not adults they're not children and I personally believe trying to hide them from these realities is what makes some of our kids more susceptible to predators like this. I'm not saying these girls parents didn't discuss sexual issues with them, but I work with a lot of at risk kids and some who've been abused. Empowering kids, especially young girls, and arming them with facts is the best way we can help protect them when we send them off into the world. We won't be hanging over their shoulder ever day telling them what's okay to see or do. But that's just my opinion.