Parents Minor Rant

[MILgymFAM]

My 13 yo xcel gold DD is a sensitive soul- I am the first to admit that. It's good because she is amazingly empathetic, and bad because her feelings are hurt easily.

Tonight on her vault practice she was told to do her fhs vault over her coach, who was standing in front of the vault. My DD went kind of sideways because she was afraid of hurting her coach, and fell (no one was hurt at all). The coach using the next vault run (L10 girls coach) stopped coaching and openly laughed out loud at my DD.

Her coach pulled her aside and said to ignore him, he is a jerk, but the story still pissed me off. Where in the world did he think his L10s came from?? They all start somewhere. At only about 11 months into gymnastics training, my DD is doing just dandy by my count, and he really was being a jerk.

Rant over. I didn't want to rant to DD- I just told her to ignore people like that, and move on, but I needed to get that out- thanks for listening (reading)..

 

[iwannacoach]

Butt head is as butt head does.

 

[Ali'sMom]

So glad her own coach told her to ignore him, and even said he's a jerk.

I have my own little sensitive soul, I totally get it.

 

[Amusibus]

What a marooon!

 

[Ginger]

Her coach has a big thumb up, and that is what counts and matters
Xcel Gold skills in only 11 months? Awesome!
(I am not that familiar w/Xcel, but Gold has skills comparable to JO L4/5, right?)

 

[Gymsanity]

Wasn't there, so I can't say for sure, but I might try and teach your daughter to lighten up a bit. If no one got hurt, it very well may have been funny. I can't tell you how much me and my girls laugh at each other, about the things that we do. As long as no one gets hurt, there is some pretty funny stuff that goes on, so why not laugh about it?. Beats crying! I think that being able to laugh at yourself helps keep you from taking yourself too seriously.

 

[MILgymFAM]

Thanks peeps! I was just mad last night because she went to bed for the first time since we moved really, really missing her old gym. She told me she missed her friends, but mostly her coaches. As for lightening up. Mostly I agree. She, her teammates, and her coach were smiling/giggling a little... Until this man she has never met in her life stopped what he was doing to laugh out loud. Literally stopped his next girl from vaulting to laugh. I guess I just don't think laughing at a stranger is the same as laughing with a friend.

 

[Rockygym]

Feel free to rant anytime I agree that laughing can be good therapy, but it has to be done the right way. I moved a lot growing up (miliary brat as well) and while in can be rough at the time I truly think it has allowed me to be more resilient with changes in my "later" life.

 

[Moxiegrl83]

As long as no one got hurt, and it wasn't condescending laughter, it wouldn't bother me. Sometimes it's funny when they wipe out. We have one L8 who falls all the time. She is an amazing athlete, but we joke she spends more time on the floor then anywhere else. She is always the first one to laugh at herself though.

My DD did a ROBHSBLO, landed weird and rolled out of it....and just kept rolling. She was fine, but it was funny. She was not amused at the giggles, from any of us. Once I explained why we were laughing, not that she messed up, but her continued roll across the floor, I got a giggle from her too.

 

[Quadqueen]

I agree with you that there's a difference between someone who knows a child well laughing at a fall and someone who does not know the child at all. It just seems mean-spirited.

That being said, perhaps the coach had a momentary brain-fart and wasn't thinking, "hey, I don't know that girl" because he probably laughs at a lot of mishaps made by his own gymnasts.

 

[Ali'sMom]

I thought of this just last night.
DD had a private to help with the vault.
When it was over, she started to tell me that DD's doing pretty well with the vault, but as she started to say it, both she and DD started cracking up. Both tried to explain to me the "wonky vault" that she did. (from what I gather, she was leaning forward, only made contact with one hand, twisted and went off the side and rolled or something... ) Coach said it made her scream for a second, until she realized DD was okay, then they both just couldn't stop laughing.
In that scenario, I appreciate the laughter, as it's "together", and it also probably kept DD from being scared that she could have hurt herself.

So there is indeed a time and place, and like Quadqueen said above, maybe that coach really didn't think about who he was laughing at/with, because he always laughs these things off. I'd like to believe that

 

[raenndrops]

The L10 coach shouldn't have been laughing...
It IS different if you know the person...
YG had her Judges Critique Clinic on Saturday... Started on Bars... Beam (forget 1/2 her routine after a fall on Full turn... kinda funny)... Floor... 1st vault warm up - runs, hits spring board, jumps, (coach still assists in 1st warm up), coach throws her over, puts hands down on table, but throw is so hard she flies PAST the back end coach (who's job is basically to make sure they don't hit the back of the vault, and YG was EASILY clear of it), lands... but toes are slightly curled and she rolls her foot and ends up sitting on the mat... then she lays down... coach goes around to check on her... YG sits up, then lays back down... I can see her thru the bottom of the judges table- smiling, so I start chuckling.
She was injured enough that she didn't get to vault for the judges (Sprained foot) If someone we didn't know had laughed at her, I woulda been IRATE, even though at first, it seemed like she was fine!

 

[Momof2]

I would feel the same as you. Your daughter and her coach laughing once they realized no one was hurt is one thing but for her coach to say the other coach was a jerk, clearly he was being mean about it. I have had a coach call my daughter a name that had nothing to do with gymnastics. Just being down right immature and mean so I get where you are coming from.

 

[JMACAZ]

I think it was rude for him to laugh when he did not know her and was supposed to be coaching...

 

[gothgymmom]

My Dd is so sensitive she gets mad at me when I laugh when she does something cute or funny. She thinks I am being mean when I laugh. She has yet to mature to that place to where she knows the true meaning of "mean" lol. I am not saying in any way, shape or form that that is what your DD is like. I was just sharing my own sensitive story.I do understand your frustration, but when I see DD or another teammate do something funny, I tend to laugh myself with the coach etc.

The one time during the beginning run around the gym, one of my DD's teammates' mother was sitting right next to me, and as I watched her DD go to jump to the bars, she completely missed and did a faceplant before getting up and finishing running. I laughed so hard and told the mother what just happened and she just had to laugh too. It was so comical that its hard to believe it happens outside of cartoons. Yes, it was that funny!

 

[MILgymFAM]

We laugh at each other/ourselves all the time too. Earlier in that same practice I was laughing with DDs coach about her attempts to master her beam mount. It was funny and she knew it too. Life is pretty hilarious sometimes, that's for sure.

 

[Ali'sMom]

Off topic a little... but the laughing got me remembering:
There was a practice last year when DD tooted on the bars (farted...), and the girls giggled (I mean, who wouldn't?). DD kept her composure then told coach she needed to go get water. She went out to my mom in the lobby SOBBING. Because "everyone laughed at her". The coach came out (she was a young one), and said "Oh, sweetie, we all do it, that's why we all laugh! come on back in". She did go back in, and everyone started sharing stories of tooting, etc. DD giggled a little, but 15 minutes later "got a headache" and needed to go home. My mom let her, because there was only a short time left.
When I got home, I said to her "If so & so tooted on the bars, wouldn't you giggle?" Yes. "Would you mean it in a mean way?" No. "So why do you think they meant it mean?" I don't know.

And then the time she cried all the way home because she was SURE the bar coaches were laughing at her because she didn't do as many pullups as the other girls. I told her I'm sure they weren't. "Well, they covered their mouths to talk to each other, but tjhey were DEFINITELY talking about ME". I said, "Maybe they realize that it's your core muscles that are holding you back from your kip, and they're figuring out how to help you with that". Oh.

I wish my daughter was the kind to blow things off, but she's very much not...
So I was glad that she accepted the coach laughing last night after the vault

 

[cbifoja]

now you all are making me feel like a jerk. I think falling is funny most of the time. and I do laugh a lot if it's clear that no one is seriously hurt. one of the funniest things I've seen in the gym was when one of our L8s was tumbling some sort of twisted move, over rotated, bounced off the spring floor, and ended up in the pit with just her feet sticking out.

 

[Quadqueen]

My DD and her teammates think it's HILARIOUS when they fart, especially when their male coach is spotting them! No embarrassed girls there!!!

 

[MILgymFAM]

now you all are making me feel like a jerk. I think falling is funny most of the time. and I do laugh a lot if it's clear that no one is seriously hurt. one of the funniest things I've seen in the gym was when one of our L8s was tumbling some sort of twisted move, over rotated, bounced off the spring floor, and ended up in the pit with just her feet sticking out.

I often find falling funny too- but honestly I wouldn't laugh at someone who fell unless I knew they wouldn't get their feelings hurt, which means knowing them pretty well. Both my DDs would be in trouble for laughing at someone who fell, with the exception made above. I may be a little stuffy on this, but being sensitive myself and having sensitive kids makes me keenly aware that feelings get hurt as much as bodies when people inadvertently make fools of themselves.