Parents Question for experienced parents

[Jroberson]

I understand the cost of gymnastics. Hypothetically if your DD wanted to center her life with gymnastics would one parent need to make themselves available at all times? And not work or anything? Or would it be overkill to give your undivided time to your childs gymnastics?

 

[NotAMom]

IMHO, it's whatever you can afford and however much you want to be involved (including the love of the sport or just of being a part of it).

Gymnastics is one of those sports that all a parent need to do is to pay the bills. By the virtue of being here on these forums, I know no one in CB falls under that category.

 

[bogwoppit]

I know we have all types of parents on the CB, some homeschool, some homeschool for gym, some work nights to be around for their kids, some work part time and full time. Some even have travel jobs where they are here there and everywhere. They all make it work for them.

But the biggest issue parents tend to deal with is the ecsalating cost, with every new level and year come new costs and that is something most new parents are not prepared for. Once you have a handle on the money that is involved it may make it easier to decide if you want to be more available to help her in her gym career.

However it is also good to remember that once gym is over for your child, in a year or 16 years (who knows) that the parents might also want to be employable etc. It is all a balance.

I work from home, when my girls were younger it allowed me the freedom to be avilable for driving the endless hours I drive. Now that they are older and can get to gym from school I use the time on this place.

Whatever works for your family is the right thing and will be perfect for your child.

 

[Aussie_coach]

Its a mistake to devote your life to your child's gymnastics training. yes, there is a lot of driving and running around but its best not to sit there and watch every practice and make your kids life you life. This can develop an unhealthy relationship with your child and your sport. One day your child will probably give up gymnastics, and if all your time and friendships re riding on it, its going to cause major problems.

 

[bookworm]

To the OP...in a word, yes. You (or someone) needs to be able to cart your child to and from gym...whether that be a carpool, friends and relatives etc ..as your child goes up in the levels , the time committment is greater. Like a prior poster said, you do not need to stay and watch every practice, but you will need to figure out a way to get her there.

As far as school...my daughter has been in "regular" school the whole time she has done gym, with some accomodations...in elementary school, she has been dismissed early to be able to get to gym and that has worked well for us. When she got to high school, she has an earlier dismissal time so she does not need to be dismissed.

Gymnastics is a huge committment for the gymnast and the family but for us, my daughter has loved it and done well and it keeps her healthy and happy so we soldier on. Good luck..

 

[Shelovesthebars]

I have a super talented 4 year old gymmie who will be competing this year as a level 3. Our gym is on par with Woga. I was in last night with my daughter so she could do an open gym and I was reading a really good book. One of the coaches said that she use to read a lot of books too until there were no more books to read. Then she started coaching and has been there for 25 years. She asked me about coming to work for the gym and my initial reaction was heck no, this was her thing and I wanted to give her her space. She is child number 5 and my best advice after raising kids to college age is to not make gymnastics your whole life or hers for that matter. There may be a time 8-10 years down the road where it may be the main focus for a few years but now let it be something she excells at and give her other opportunities just to be 4. A healthy balance now will keep you from resenting gymnastics later during the intense years up ahead. I know some families that have split over gymnastics. Balance, Balance, Balance!
Choosing to stay home is fine as long as it is good for your whole family. I have however carpooled with many working families and it always worked out.

 

[Granny Smith]

Both dh and I work and it will always be that way in our household (that's how it is if I want to be able to pay for her sport and maintain our standard of living). I do have a work schedule that works so that I can be done before school lets out and I can my gymmie from school to gym. I do not stay to watch as I have another child who I must make it home in time for him to get off the bus.

I do not give my gymmie my undivided attention, she gets what is needed and I am responsible for her schedule, making sure she gets where she needs to. I love to come watch about the last hour of practice, she's there for 4 hrs at a time. I do have gym mom friends that I enjoy talking to so I will stay longer to do that sometimes.

 

[Pickle's Mom]

Well, I'm not a very experienced mom, but I am a working mom with a competitive gymnast. The only way we have been able to make it work is through carpools and a strong community (and very kind bosses).

This year Pickle has workouts from 4-7. Another mom drives her from school. I then take that child home so that the mom can get her younger kids to bed on time.

Summer is very stressful to me (I've posted about this before). We won't know what level our kids are at or when they will workout until June. I know she will probably do 4 hours 4 times a week, but it could start at 9 or noon or 3. I've approached several moms about providing me wraparound care for a fee. However, I don't know if my Pickle will actually be on team with any of those girls.

My career is important to me. I went to college and grad school and I really like what I do. While my children are my #1 priority, I believe that I can do both.

(Of course, I'm sure I will have ten more harried posts about summer before June hits.)

 

[ZJsMom]

For one parent not to work because of gymnastics, IMHO, would be a bad idea. You really don't want to sit and watch every practice. It's unhealthy for you and for your dd. I know for myself, watching practice raises my bloodpressure and could lead me to be an overinvolved parent. If you just check in every few months, or even wait for meet season, you'll see real progress and be nicely surprised.

I agree with Bog that the biggest commitment to be prepared for is the escalating cost. When we first moved to a bigger metro area around two years ago, the cost for my two kids team tuition was around $200 a month and I though, "this isn't bad at all." Now, two years later it's over $600 a month and will go up again over the summer, both kids are expected to attend fly-away meets, and dd at least is asking for privates on a regular basis.

Given this reality, it becomes hard to make ends meet with only one parent working. Ideally, if you can find a job that gives you a flexible schedule so you can transport your kid to practice and privates--not to mention meets with Friday sessions, that's probably the best bet. Plenty of gym families have two parents working standard full time hours, however, and make it work.

 

[Jroberson]

Thanks

Thanks everyone for replying. I was wondering how all the parents Are making it, with all the practice and competitions, we are still only in recreational gym and we are tired by the end of the week!

 

[bogwoppit]

I hear ya!!

When my kids were young )and needed me to drive them there and back 8 times a week. Two girls training four times a week at different times with a roundtrip of 90 minutes!!!) I often thought I should keep a sleeping bag at the gym so I could just live there. I still had my older son to fit in somewhere too, life was a blur!

I feel for you. It is very time consuming, especially when they are very young as most gyms like you to stick around to help with bathroom breaks etc.

That gets easier and harder as they get older. They are at the gym more, but they will not need you, except to get them there and back. But the time commitment is huge.

 

[bpatient]

I happened to read a book by 1986 National Champion Jennifer Sey yesterday. Perhaps Sey's account of her family's experiences as she grew up as an elite gymnast could provide some information to help you to understand how (and how not) to respond if your daughter wants "to center her life with gymnastics."

Amazon.com: Chalked Up: Inside Elite Gymnastics' Merciless Coaching, Overzealous Parents, Eating Disorders, and Elusive Olympic Dreams: Jennifer Sey: Books

 

[MeetDirector]

To the OP -

In our gymnastics life, the key word is BALANCE (and I don't mean on a beam). The gymnast needs to have balance in her life; her gymnastics is at the gym and school and home are separate. An overly involved parent inevitably starts "coaching" at home; parents need to remember that the coaching is done by a trained professional. Parents need to be there to keep the gymmie grounded and to keep pushing on the other parts of thier life - like school.

As you will undoubtedly discover, gymnastics is not cheap. As others have siad, the higher a gymnast goes, the higher the monthly costs go as well. We just finished our first Level 7 season and I can safely say that our costs have doubled since the level 5 years. Tuition, leos, team fees, meet fees, and the biggie - out of state travel, ramp up quickly at the optional levels. You really need to go into things with both eyes wide open. Having two incomes is almost a necessity.

Good Luck.

RK

 

[gymjourneymom]

Its a mistake to devote your life to your child's gymnastics training. yes, there is a lot of driving and running around but its best not to sit there and watch every practice and make your kids life you life. This can develop an unhealthy relationship with your child and your sport. One day your child will probably give up gymnastics, and if all your time and friendships re riding on it, its going to cause major problems.

This is spot on advice Aussie coach! Parents need to remember it is their child's sport! When they become overly obsessed they put to much pressure the child to succeed. It's sad sight to see believe me. I've seen this play out many times already. Parents get too pushy & burn the poor kids out. You'll hear this a million times...gymnastics is a marathon. Parents need to be supportive of the child...but let the child live her own life! You have your own life to live. We should all have something of our own...a job, a hobby, etc. Something other than obsessing about our child's sport. Other wise what do you do once she wants to move on to something else or graduates? Most of the parents at my DD's gym both have jobs outside the home in some form or another. We parents have kind of have formed our own community...we network about carpooling to practice, meets, etc. We all make it work because we are all in the same boat(as far as needing each others help). It's all about teamwork for the parents too. I could never quit working...it's how I pay for this sport!

 

[Shelovesthebars]

Bog, you hit the nail on the head with having to stick around for bathroom breaks not to mention not being close enough to go home. When or if my 4 year old makes it to level 4, my life should be easier because right now her practices are too short for me to do anything than read a good book. I could go a little crazy watching all the time. Argh!

 

[MRSIII]

My 7 year old son has just finished his first season of competition Level 4.
Right now, he is at the gym 3 days a week for a total of 9 hours.

We have 2 other sons. My oldest son (10) is a wonderful basketball player!
My youngest son (6) really enjoys baseball right now. Who knows if this is what he will continue to want to play?

So, gymnastics is number 1 for my 7 year old and our committment to him is to pay for gymnastics & get him to each practice, meet, and a few private lessons every once in a while. Colby asked his grandparents for money for his birthday coming up. He wants to use all his birthday money for a private lesson! I do not stay and watch every practice- although, I enjoy watching part of the practice and chatting with the other parents.

My other boys have things that are important to them. And... we make sure to get them to games and practices for those sports.
And.. believe it or not... I have things that I want to do also. I love scrapbooking, photography, and traveling!

I want the boys to be well rounded. School & academics are also very important to our family. They have to make good grades in order to continue to be in extra activities.

My dear hubby and I both work full-time. I am a 1st grade teacher and my boys attend school with me! It is a wonderful career because we (the boys and I) get out early enough to get all the boys to their activities. But, it takes BOTH of us (dear hubby and I) to get them to all of their events!

I guess we will find out in June also if our son will be competiting at Level 5 next season. I am anxious to find out the summer gymnastics schedule also!!

This is a great thread.