WAG Teammate issues (long)

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Splat

Coach
Gymnast
I'm a level 4 gymnast. I practice with levels 4 and up. I am the oldest by around 3 years. I'm in a small gym and have always had issues with getting along with teammates. However this year has been the worst. Someday I want to quit or switch gyms. We have one other gym near us but it's not very good. I love the coaches in my current gym. I practice with 7 girls. Gymnast 1?is rude to everyone and never listens. Gymnast 2 acts however gymnast 1 acts or worse. Gymnast 3 complains all the time and never tries. Gymnast 4 is the youngest and has recently sprained her wrist and never does anything (including conditioning). Gymnast 5 crazy and never focuses. Gymnast 6 is pretty good until she hangs out with the others then messes around. Gymnast 7 is currently faking an injury and finds it super funny. She is the highest level girl and no longer tries any skills. They all cheat on conditioning and stretching. We have 3 weeks till state and everyone acts like they are in a rec class. I have talked to the coaches. Coach 1 tries to help get everyone to behave and do what they should be doing but, it doesn't help. Coach 2 gave up trying to help at the start of the season. I have just gotten back from an injury and I try to work hard to get my skills but, with everyone around me messing around its kind of hard. Also i really want to move up to level 5 so all year I've been pushing myself. I'm tired of everyone not trying and then complaining when they do bad at a meet. What do I do??????? I really need help I'm getting to the point where I can't stand it anymore.
 
I can understand the frustration in your situation and that you want your team to grow up and work. Unfortunately you cannot control the actions of others, you only have control over yourself.
I would try having a conversation with your parents and the gym manager and see how the grown ups can handle their part, but of the gymnastics part, only concentrate on yourself.
Although everyone is having their own issues, try focusing on yourself, you training, condition hard, focus on the meets. Try to make an incentive for yourself. Hopefully, your coaches will notice you taking it seriously and will work you harder and you will do better at the meets.
It's hard when your teammates are not on the same page though. Especially in gymnastics where hours are long and intense. Having friends in the same boat help. But for now, you will have to try and focus on what's good and ignore what's bad. Ask for help from the coaches......and remember, the grass is not always greener on the other side...
Good luck!
 
Much like Munchkin just said....look after yourself, work hard, and I would even take it a step further and talk with your coaches about your aspirations and that you want to be challenged and succeed. If you take care of that, sooner rather than later, you will move on and leave these other girls behind.
 
With you being the oldest by three years, you are probably also the most mature. It's a blessing and a curse. You are focused, determined, etc and the other girls just may not be developmentally where you are yet. Maybe their heart isn't in it anymore, or maybe they just have some growing up to do. It's hard to stay focused in a chaotic environment so I definitely understand your concern. Unfortunately, like the other posters said, you only have control of your own actions at this point. I don't think trying to talk to your teammates about it would do any good, it sounds like things are already strained. Honestly it's up to your coaches to keep the situation under control and there need to be consequences for their actions. However if they won't take control of the situation, there's not much you can do but just keep working hard and let them know you are serious about your gymnastics and they will see that you are making the best out of a less than ideal situation. And you may be surprised, some of these girls may mature in the next year or so, and the ones who don't may not want to stick with gymnastics as the further you move up, the more focused and driven you have to be.
 
As much as you love your coaches and your gym, a team full of kids with fake injuries and failure to try is a reflection of poor coaching.

A good coach will balance high expectations with clear consequences for poor behaviour with an exciting and charged environment which builds the kids confidence and introduces them to new challenging in an exciting but step by step manner allowing them to master each step before being thrown into the next. Lessons should be varied to keep them interesting and lots of fun drills included to learn new skills. Lessons should be busy and active with all kids engaged at all times.

An injury that lasts more than three days and prevents the gymnast from doing a lot of training should be seen to by a physiotherapist before the gymnast is permitted to continue training. Coming week in and week out with an injury and not doing anything is simply unacceptable. Never assume an injury is fake even if the pain is on and off and there are no outward physical signs of the injury. Not all injuries present the same and if the child displays chronic pain, real or fake it is a serious concern. Once a physical therapist has been seen then that gymnast should not be sitting out of any activity, if there is something they can't do they should either be doing their physio exersices or the coaches writes alternative work into the program for them.

If kids sense the rules are unclear, they will push the boundaries and test them out. Even kids who want to learn can still find it very hard to do so if the rules are not clear. And the rules are definetly not clear and consequences are not followed through of the behaviour you describe would not be happening.
 
Why does your banner say you're a coach?? As a level 4 gymnast I find that a bit surprising...

Not saying that it isn't possible, especially since you are in a smaller gym, but if the other girls' work ethics were really that poor, I would imagine they would have a hard time making it to team in the first place. Every gymnast that I have had the pleasure of meeting that has either chosen/been invited to the competitive track of this sport, are some of the hardest working and nicest kids I have met. Your description paints an awfully negative picture.

If what you are saying is true, I would suggest you continue focusing on your skills and effort. At the end of the day you cannot control how much effort another exerts. Your team may take a hit, but you have the ability to represent yourself as individual at states as well.
 
^^^^ with meganliz77

You are level 4, a former gymnast and a coach. And a new member. Pardon my concern.

Level 4s................. average age, my experience only 9, you beat them by 3 years making you.................... 12................ Need to be 14 to be here.
Then add coaching at 12?????????????

Curious???????????? on a lot of things.
 
^^^^ with meganliz77

You are level 4, a former gymnast and a coach. And a new member. Pardon my concern.

Level 4s................. average age, my experience only 9, you beat them by 3 years making you.................... 12................ Need to be 14 to be here.
Then add coaching at 12?????????????

Curious???????????? on a lot of things.

So, she states she is the oldest by about 3 years...there could be 1-2 older...not average age. Also, she states she is 16 in another thread. Very well could be coaching rec as well as working out. As for some of the tags, more than once someone has checked the wrong box.....assume positive intent

As for your teammate issues, as the oldest you are going to run into things like this. Kids that aren't as mature as you are. You can't expect a 10 year old to have the same work ethic as a 16 year old. Work hard and learn your stuff :) The others will learn from your example.
 
So, she states she is the oldest by about 3 years...there could be 1-2 older...not average age. Also, she states she is 16 in another thread. Very well could be coaching rec as well as working out. As for some of the tags, more than once someone has checked the wrong box.....assume positive intent

As for your teammate issues, as the oldest you are going to run into things like this. Kids that aren't as mature as you are. You can't expect a 10 year old to have the same work ethic as a 16 year old. Work hard and learn your stuff :) The others will learn from your example.


I've seen too many fishy threads to not be skeptical at the very least... A 16 yo level 4 would be awfully rare...at least in my neck of the woods.
 
I've seen too many fishy threads to not be skeptical at the very least... A 16 yo level 4 would be awfully rare...at least in my neck of the woods.

I agree. I just feel like every other thread these day challenges new people. The mods are really good at figuring out who is fishy and who is not. I just like to give new people a little bit of the benefit....until they prove to be a fake :)
 
I believe in another thread she said that the wrong box got checked and she didn't know how to undo it (at least I think it was this OP).

OP - I'm sorry you are in this situation. I have nothing else to add that hasn't been said by others. Keep doing what you are doing and rise above it all. This will serve you well now and in other areas of your life.
 
Just to add that over here, in the backwaters, coaching at 14 is VERY common, in fact we have a long established rec awards system that most gymnasts follow and the minimum age to take the coaching exam ( and it is a course and test) is 14, Number 1 son took it as soon as he could. Its our way of keeping the older, maybe not so talented but keen gymnasts involved in the sport.

The next level coaching certificate you have to be 17 to take so it keeps them involved a learning before they can get their qualifications.
 
Don't be so quick to write off the OP, guys. I'm a 16yo level 3, working on level 4 skills. They exist. I'm not on any team, though...

Anyway, OP, I completely understand your situation, as my gym is also small and because I'm in a rec class (that's also combined with younger kids!) there can be quite a bit of monkeying around. Or, I should say, attempting to monkey around. Your coaches need to establish ground rules and make sure they're followed. If kids don't want to try, that's up to them, but rudeness/dangerous behaviour needs to be stopped. Maybe get your parents to talk to the coach (depending on how old you are) if you've tried? Or talk to the manager/head coach?

We have an injury faker, who's actually a teen, who always seems to think it's a good way of getting out conditioning and other things she doesn't want to do. Coaches just give her different, and usually harder, conditioning, saying "if you're injured, don't come to gym." I think she's slowly learning the lesson :p

I've learned not to take rubbish from those kids, either. One of them thinks it's funny to fall over, and on beam, she's liable to grab you too, which is terrible. Just be very distant, get annoyed if they do something dangerous, and stick to yourself. You'll move on, and they won't!
 
Why does your banner say you're a coach?? As a level 4 gymnast I find that a bit surprising...

Not saying that it isn't possible, especially since you are in a smaller gym, but if the other girls' work ethics were really that poor, I would imagine they would have a hard time making it to team in the first place. Every gymnast that I have had the pleasure of meeting that has either chosen/been invited to the competitive track of this sport, are some of the hardest working and nicest kids I have met. Your description paints an awfully negative picture.

If what you are saying is true, I would suggest you continue focusing on your skills and effort. At the end of the day you cannot control how much effort another exerts. Your team may take a hit, but you have the ability to represent yourself as individual at states as well.

At our gym you can coach at the age of 16 so I have started coaching when I'm not practicing.
 
Thanks everyone for the advice. I'm going to talk to my parents more about this and maybe even the director.
 
^^^^ with meganliz77

You are level 4, a former gymnast and a coach. And a new member. Pardon my concern.

Level 4s................. average age, my experience only 9, you beat them by 3 years making you.................... 12................ Need to be 14 to be here.
Then add coaching at 12?????????????

Curious???????????? on a lot of things.

I am not a former gymnast I just don't know how to fix that. I am a coach I'm over 16 which allows me to coach rec. classes. I'm you have any other questions please ask I'm willing to answer.
 
I've seen too many fishy threads to not be skeptical at the very least... A 16 yo level 4 would be awfully rare...at least in my neck of the woods.

I started late at the age of 11 so being 16 and only in level four is a little over a year per level. Which honestly not that weird considering I had no gymnastics experience when I started.
 
I believe in another thread she said that the wrong box got checked and she didn't know how to undo it (at least I think it was this OP).

OP - I'm sorry you are in this situation. I have nothing else to add that hasn't been said by others. Keep doing what you are doing and rise above it all. This will serve you well now and in other areas of your life.

Yes it was. Thanks for the advise.
 
Splat, I hope your answers above put to rest any questions regarding your authenticity with some here. I hope when my daughter is 16 she is teaching gymnastics to others if her love of the sport is as strong as it is now. Good luck with your training and development and the issues surrounding it.
 
Splat, I hope your answers above put to rest any questions regarding your authenticity with some here. I hope when my daughter is 16 she is teaching gymnastics to others if her love of the sport is as strong as it is now. Good luck with your training and development and the issues surrounding it.

Thank you
 

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