What to do with the need for constant attention...

[lilgymmie7]

I don't know if I am just a glutton for punishment or what... I found myself in the same ol' same o'...Little DD is now at a gym with a parent who I have known for ages due to older DD's involvement in gymnastics. Once again, I sat down next to this parent and attempted to have an innocent conversation about a teammate of both of our DD's.
I perceeded to say how talented this little girl was and how in talking with this other little girl's mom I found out she was going elite in the near future... Well, the mom I was speaking to then chimed in " Oh HC said MY DD ( hers NOT mine)was also going elite!" That is always her take. Someone does something great, awesome she won't be undersold. It is frustrating to me and mostly because it happens all the time. I really feel for her and mostly her DD.
I for one have always tried to give credit where credit is due. When someone does well, they should be acknowledged. I hope really that the coaches do not hear her speak the way she does because her DD could feel the ill effects. The kicker was, " But don't tell anyone I said that to you..." Why the secret?

**Sorry just had to vent...since I can't tell anyone her GREAT news!**

 

[Deanna]

Sorry you having to deal with that. Some people really do have superiority issues. The sad thing is, this little girl will probably repeat Moms actions, thinking that is the way to do. With people like that I literally just smile and nod. After a while I will smile and nod about something I shouldn't have and they get the picture, I wasn't really listening. I would just ignore her..or avoid her. Maybe say something in front of the mom, and coach (of course with out the girls around) about how exciting it is to hear that so and so..are going to train elite..naming her daughter as one. Who am I kidding I probably wouldn't have the nerve to do that. But I agree it does sound a little fishy that you aren't supposed to tell anyone. Hmmm..why not? And then, why did she tell you?

 

[Faith]

It's known as "competitive parenting", or round here, a "topper"- you can't say anything without the other person having to top it.

Tbh I'm not sure you should have been discussing a third party's progress anyway. It's best to keep to your own child, and smile/nod/congratulate anyone who says how well their child is doing.

 

[bogwoppit]

My way of avoiding this is to never talk about someone else's kid unless their parent is there and is in on the conversation.

Second to that, stay out of the gym, that solves 99% of all crazy gym crap.

Third, pretend not to understand French, that solves the other 1% of crap that can happen at pick up.

Hear no evil, see no evil and speak no evil. Gosh those monkeys were smart.

The parents who think their kid is THE BEST, will never be able to resist promoting them, that is what nut jobs do.

 

[cher062]

^^^^^ What Bog said ^^^^^

 

[Deleted member D3987]

yep^^^ and the humor in this is that this gym doesn't have elites. and they won't do the elite program!

 

[jago]

yep^^^ and the humor in this is that this gym doesn't have elites. and they won't do the elite program!

dunno ... I so love reading your posts! Always entertaining us. And educating us.

 

[lilgymmie7]

I just wanted to add that no, we weren't actually discussing another child. I simply made a comment, "Oh she's here...She is fantastic! Her Mom said they were prepping her for elite." That's when the mom I was talking to chimed in, " My DD..."
Dunno, I hear you but....The mom of the talented gymmie also works at the gym and is quite versed in gym. I work with her aunt who did inform me that both parents where college gymnasts. I don't think she was giving lip service. But what do I know?
Further, I usually do NOT stay at the gym. For the most part, I walk DD in talk a few minutes, pick up another mom and we go walking, or run errands alone and/or with a friend. However, HC called me on Tuesday wondering where DD was-(small misunderstanding), and then I noted how 'crazy' the day was, so I decided to stay a bit to see how the day would unfold. Let me also add, it takes me 50 mins. to get to the gym. I go in to use the 'john'!
DD's schedule changed slightly, and I simply wanted to see yesterday if things were okay. I 100% trust her coaches, but come on...I am a mom at heart. This child is seven. I have to be her eyes and ears until she can do it for herself. Dunno, I know you are well informed. However, that does not supercede others' knowledge as well.
See, I posted because I simply wanted to vent and on the same note see if others (okay dumb) have experienced this. I am a very easy going person, however, I also am very matter of fact. This other Mom I mentioned has been like this for some time. I did mention my older DD was with her older DD and man that was an experience. She smiled when I told her older DD was leaving that gym. I am trying to find a way to talk with her about her little intracacies. She was a good friend until then, and now it bothers me that she is soooo competitive. Okay, I probably opened up a can of worms. I am one of those people that feels the need to help if I can. Even if it means putting myself out there.
Bog, I have posted many times here and you should know I am NOT one of those 'crazies' that stay and watch and try to control DD's gym life. There were certain factors that warranted my being there. But let me again add I TRUST HER COACHES. He himself said he did not want DD's trainning compromised. What I noted as disconcerting yesterday with the craziness of the day caused HC to call me yesterday to request a change in day. As a teacher, I like to be part of the solution not the problem. This is also true when I put on my parent hat. I felt good when DD's coach called me to say, " Maybe it's better if she and the others go on Thurs. in place of Wednesday. There are simply too many in the gym on Wednesday." I wasn't off base after all.
Dunno I REALLY feel like I know you....

 

[Deleted member D3987]

I just wanted to add that no, we weren't actually discussing another child. I simply made a comment, "Oh she's here...She is fantastic! Her Mom said they were prepping her for elite." That's when the mom I was talking to chimed in, " My DD..."
Dunno, I hear you but....The mom of the talented gymmie also works at the gym and is quite versed in gym. I work with her aunt who did inform me that both parents where college gymnasts. I don't think she was giving lip service. But what do I know?
Further, I usually do NOT stay at the gym. For the most part, I walk DD in talk a few minutes, pick up another mom and we go walking, or run errands alone and/or with a friend. However, HC called me on Tuesday wondering where DD was-(small misunderstanding), and then I noted how 'crazy' the day was, so I decided to stay a bit to see how the day would unfold. Let me also add, it takes me 50 mins. to get to the gym. I go in to use the 'john'!
DD's schedule changed slightly, and I simply wanted to see yesterday if things were okay. I 100% trust her coaches, but come on...I am a mom at heart. This child is seven. I have to be her eyes and ears until she can do it for herself. Dunno, I know you are well informed. However, that does not supercede others' knowledge as well.
See, I posted because I simply wanted to vent and on the same note see if others (okay dumb) have experienced this. I am a very easy going person, however, I also am very matter of fact. This other Mom I mentioned has been like this for some time. I did mention my older DD was with her older DD and man that was an experience. She smiled when I told her older DD was leaving that gym. I am trying to find a way to talk with her about her little intracacies. She was a good friend until then, and now it bothers me that she is soooo competitive. Okay, I probably opened up a can of worms. I am one of those people that feels the need to help if I can. Even if it means putting myself out there.
Bog, I have posted many times here and you should know I am NOT one of those 'crazies' that stay and watch and try to control DD's gym life. There were certain factors that warranted my being there. But let me again add I TRUST HER COACHES. He himself said he did not want DD's trainning compromised. What I noted as disconcerting yesterday with the craziness of the day caused HC to call me yesterday to request a change in day. As a teacher, I like to be part of the solution not the problem. This is also true when I put on my parent hat. I felt good when DD's coach called me to say, " Maybe it's better if she and the others go on Thurs. in place of Wednesday. There are simply too many in the gym on Wednesday." I wasn't off base after all.
Dunno I REALLY feel like I know you....

1st bold: the mom is obsessed & nuts. the dad was a good gymnast & the mom a wanna be. the daughter is 12 and looks 8. the other 2 are in this girls group. 1 is also 12 but looks 8. the new one "P" is 10 and looks it. your daughter's coaches will not do the elite program. and they have their reasons.

2nd bold: if i'm posting it, i know it. if i don't know, i don't post it. i've known you since cathy fox (RIP) so maybe you should know NOW not to question what i know.

3rd bold: we do.

the original point of my post was the humor i found in the tripe you were listening to when that tripe will never take place in that gym in the near future.

 

[lilgymmie7]

1st bold: the mom is obsessed & nuts. the dad was a good gymnast & the mom a wanna be. the daughter is 12 and looks 8. the other 2 are in this girls group. 1 is also 12 but looks 8. the new one "P" is 10 and looks it. your daughter's coaches will not do the elite program. and they have their reasons.

2nd bold: if i'm posting it, i know it. if i don't know, i don't post it. i've known you since cathy fox (RIP) so maybe you should know NOW not to question what i know.

3rd bold: we do.

the original point of my post was the humor i found in the tripe you were listening to when that tripe will never take place in that gym in the near future.

Don't tell me CF passed away! I can still picture her in those crazy socks!
BTW, the mom I was referring to was not P's or L's mom. "J" was the one.

I don't have C there because of elite whatever. I really like his 'whole team' atmosphere. C is so in love with him and the whole gym. Today she begged to go to practice! I NEED a rest!

Don't get so touchy...I ran into you at CS didn't I! It will be so nice not to have to work that meet! Talk about needing a rest!!

Dunno, so you know how far I have to drive then! Hey, son now does wrestling- off season at Gomez in Ca. St. Call me crazy!

B said you were one of her best coaches by far!! Okay, I just strangled myself!

 

[Deleted member D3987]

we did not run in to each other at CS. but did somewhere else. when the time is right i will reveal myself to you at a competition.

and yes, you are crazy driving all the way out there from where you live. we agree on that.

and Cathy succumbed to breast cancer.

and tell B i said hello...but not from who you think i might be but i know her also since she was a kid.

 

[lilgymmie7]

we did not run in to each other at CS. but did somewhere else. when the time is right i will reveal myself to you at a competition.

and yes, you are crazy driving all the way out there from where you live. we agree on that.

and Cathy succumbed to breast cancer.

and tell B i said hello...but not from who you think i might be but i know her also since she was a kid.

Now I have to really think...

What we do for our kids! DS is football one day....wrestling the next! But his smile is worth it!! I drive because of that.

I didn't know that about Cathy. I hope her family is alright. I can't believe where BGC was is now condos.

I bet you B will shed some light for me. Can you believe she is in college and away from home. My little Drama Queen/gymnast is now living down town studying acting and writing? Where does the time go? C will be off soon. I know...she has a while to go. DS graduates from 8th this year. He was the little 'wild thing' at BGC...

I knew there was something oddly 'special' about you....This is definitely a small world.

 

[Coacharella]

Whooaa, my mind has been blown, that was so weird that you know eachother!! lol
Is it just me or is dunno like GOD ? Ha, why does he know everything? lol

 

[lilgymmie7]

Whooaa, my mind has been blown, that was so weird that you know eachother!! lol
Is it just me or is dunno like GOD ? Ha, why does he know everything? lol

Yes it is! But now the idea will keep me awake for some time!
Older DD was blown away about the owner of her first ever gym. She still has fond memories of that gym. The coaches, right dunno, not so much...But that's another thread...Not worth it!

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Whooaa, my mind has been blown, that was so weird that you know eachother!! lol
Is it just me or is dunno like GOD ? Ha, why does he know everything? lol

oh geez...i probably won't wake up tomorrow cause you invoked God's name...great...now i have to pull an all nighter...

couldn't you just have said that "i get around" and invoked The Beach Boys or that i know stuff?

 

[jago]

oh geez...i probably won't wake up tomorrow cause you invoked God's name...great...now i have to pull an all nighter...

couldn't you just have said that "i get around" and invoked The Beach Boys or that i know stuff?

OMG!!
I'm rolling on the floor now!
dunno ... you should sell tickets!!
I have tears streaming down!!!

 

[TexasRose]

I don't know if I am just a glutton for punishment or what... I found myself in the same ol' same o'...Little DD is now at a gym with a parent who I have known for ages due to older DD's involvement in gymnastics. Once again, I sat down next to this parent and attempted to have an innocent conversation about a teammate of both of our DD's.
I perceeded to say how talented this little girl was and how in talking with this other little girl's mom I found out she was going elite in the near future... Well, the mom I was speaking to then chimed in " Oh HC said MY DD ( hers NOT mine)was also going elite!" That is always her take. Someone does something great, awesome she won't be undersold. It is frustrating to me and mostly because it happens all the time. I really feel for her and mostly her DD.
I for one have always tried to give credit where credit is due. When someone does well, they should be acknowledged. I hope really that the coaches do not hear her speak the way she does because her DD could feel the ill effects. The kicker was, " But don't tell anyone I said that to you..." Why the secret?

**Sorry just had to vent...since I can't tell anyone her GREAT news!**

I feel ya! There's a mom at my DD's gym that is the same way. She sits and stays for all the practices! There's a small group of the mom's who do and my husband said they look like "a bowl full of drama." LOL. It is frustrating when someone feels they have to always one up you. This mom at my DD's gym talks about the other kids and it drives me crazy. She was talking about my friend's dd the other day in practice, analyzing her on bars. She asked me what I thought and I told her it wasn't my business and that I was only watching my dd. I no longer stay for practices because of this mom, and a few others. It just seems like they can't just pay attention to their kid and that really frustrates me because I feel it is rude. I would just try to stay away from the mom you're talking about. That's what I try to do once I see who is the drama mama, lol

 

[gymmomntc2e6]

oh geez...i probably won't wake up tomorrow cause you invoked God's name...great...now i have to pull an all nighter...

couldn't you just have said that "i get around" and invoked The Beach Boys or that i know stuff?

Dunno, PLEASE tell me you woke up this morning ! I don't know if I could last here without out your support, advice & especially humor.

 

[Tumblequeensmom]

oh geez...i probably won't wake up tomorrow cause you invoked God's name...great...now i have to pull an all nighter...

couldn't you just have said that "i get around" and invoked The Beach Boys or that i know stuff?

OMG!!! This is definitely my big laugh for the day. (Yes, I am cheating, sitting here on FB at work this a.m.!!!) HA HA HA!!! I really needed that laugh!!!

Back to the original OP... I learned a long time ago NOT to discuss other gymmies... even if you're trying to make a sincere compliment, things tend to get twisted around no matter what or how you say it!!! I also firmly believe(d) in the "drop and dash" philosophy when it came to dropping DD off at the gym. Sometimes avoidance is definitely the best policy!

 

[justanothergymmom]

Whooaa, my mind has been blown, that was so weird that you know eachother!! lol
Is it just me or is dunno like GOD ? Ha, why does he know everything?

Quote of the year!!! LOL!

OMG!!! This is definitely my big laugh for the day. (Yes, I am cheating, sitting here on FB at work this a.m.!!!) HA HA HA!!! I really needed that laugh!!!

Back to the original OP... I learned a long time ago NOT to discuss other gymmies... even if you're trying to make a sincere compliment, things tend to get twisted around no matter what or how you say it!!! I also firmly believe(d) in the "drop and dash" philosophy when it came to dropping DD off at the gym. Sometimes avoidance is definitely the best policy!

So true! Sadly, even if you are complimenting another gymnast directly to her own parents, you really never know how it will be received by them...