Parents Afraid of coaches?

[cbifoja]

I didn't want to hijack the "asking for a meeting" thread but someone's post interested me. Someone mentioned being afraid of the coach and I've actually read that sentiment being expressed several times here. So I've got to ask, why are some parents afraid of the coach? Do they yell? Make rude facial expressions? Or is it something internal that comes from just you (the fearful parent)?

I've had some pretty forthright, difficult conversations with DD's coach and yet still crack jokes/tease/ask about her day, etc. We've disagreed, I've complained, she's scolded, but we still can have open and honest conversations. So am I just lucky that DD's coach is so easy going? Are a lot of coaches mini-demons?

 

[Iwannabemargo]

Pretty sure its internal :

I was a very nervous child, low self estime and very worried by authority figures - I worry about being viewed as pushy, CGM, interfereing etc.

OH, very self assured, has no idea what an authority figure is, no problem at all and as they are all female, jokes, flirts and teases his way

 

[Flossyduck]

depends on the coach for me. dd's first team coach was terrifying - wouldn't look you in the eye, very abrupt speech, obviously couldn't wait to get rid of you, made me feel really small. Second team coach really lovely, chatty, down to earth and approachable. Current coach somewhere inbetween - I wouldn't worry about asking for an appointment if necessary and she is nice when I talk to her, but not overly familiar and chatty otherwise. I think it's the fear coaches have of the cgm and the fear we have of seeming like a cgm - nervy combination.

 

[GymMom67]

I also think it depends on the coach. I absolutely adore DD's current coach. I could totally hang out with her outside the gym. The coach for the next level up, however.....my DD doesn't even have her yet and I'm already scared of her. LOL

 

[munchkin3]

Depends on the coach.....I am a parent and always take the approach of.....coaches generally don't like to talk to parents unless it is for a serious issue. Joking and small talk fine, but I can always tell when I approach coach with a question, body language changes.......I get it though...... I have overheard some unbelievable parent 'talks'....and, YES I can get a bit over reactive when it comes to my kids....can't help it, but I am sensitive to them too...they have an incredibly difficult job, and I respect them tremendously.

I have been scared of the coaches at different times....I am sure they have been scared of me too!

 

[wallflower]

Yes, I'm terrified of DD's coaches. I avoid them at all costs. I will avoid even using the restroom at the gym if I have to walk past them! I just don't want to bother them. I don't want to ask questions, especially stupid ones (that's why I come here), don't want them to think I'm nuts, etc. Other parents seem fine with asking questions, even crazy ones. I do have to say that once I get to know some of her coaches and especially once they stop coaching her, I lose that fear quickly.

 

[okie]

I totally stink at confrontation and conflict in general. Approaching a coach just to touch base is easy enough but expressing concerns is very difficult. As I am not the expert, I tend to trust the coaches and their decisions. There was an ankle weight concern that I solved indirectly (cowardly) by buying my DD with 1/2 lb weights instead of 2 lb weights.

I actually get along very well with the coaches and frequently joke/converse with them. So, to answer your question, in my case it is me, not the coaches, that is at the root of avoidance.

Sent from my SCH-I535 using ChalkBucket mobile app

 

[LizzieLac]

Not terrified or afraid, but our coach's always seem to have their guard up and put out the "unapproachable"vibe. If you want to talk small talk, current events, weather, funny things that happened on the way to work - fine. But, as soon as you want to talk about your kid, her training, meet performance, or something more serious then it all changes.

 

[wallinbl]

Afraid? Only that one day they'll come out and say that DD stinks and isn't going to get as far as she wants to get.

Avoid? If you give me the opportunity, I'll ask a million questions. I know they get tired of that, so I try not to get into too many conversations with them that aren't necessary.

 

[taylortumbles]

I'm afraid ill annoy them, piss them off, or be labeled as 'one of those' moms so yes aside from saying Hi if I encounter them face to face, I tend to shy away. I'm an overly paranoid and shy person

 

[AlexsGymmyMom]

I am very non-confrontational. I am the same with my kids teachers as well. I guess somewhere in me I am afraid if I annoy or disagree with them that my kid will be the one that the teacher or coach takes it out on. Whats even weirder is that I work at the gym 1 night a week and still can't approach the coaches with a concern! I guess thats why I come here!

 

[AnotherGymParent]

It depends on the coach dd has had one that we would disagree have hard candid conversations yet he really cared for dd and we were still friends. Then other coaches have presented themselves as off limits or don't want to be involved with the parental aspect. As a teacher I know how important that relationships with parents is. Some coaches just aren't good or don't want to deal with that just my experience