Parents Confused and wondering what to do (rec gymnastics related)

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I have 2 girls who are in rec gymnastics, ages 3 (Tiny) and turning 5 (Big) in a few weeks.

At my gym, there are 2 more advanced rec classes the kids go to from which they select kids who go to pre-team. One class (let's call it Jr.) is for children ages 3 to 5, and another (Mini) is for ages 4 to 8.

Tiny took a few sessions of a rec class that was being taught by the Pre-Team and Level 3/4 coach. She recommended Tiny go into the more advanced rec classes as she felt she was a good candidate to eventually go to pre-team. So I signed Tiny up to the Jr. class.

Meanwhile, Big was in the middle of transitioning out of the Jr. class into the Mini class. When the coach for the Jr. class found out that Tiny was recommended to go in her class, she sat me down and told me that she wanted Tiny to be in a rec class she coached first that was the same level as the class she had been taking, but a different time. Keep in mind that the Jr. coach had never met Tiny before. That was 2 sessions ago. We are just finishing up the 3rd session in a row of the same class. For the Fall, Tiny is still in the same rec class (4th session), but I see her withdrawing and being very bored in class now. Meanwhile, other kids who are recommended continue to get to go straight to the Jr. class without having to pass the Jr. coach's extra requirement.

So for the Fall, Big will go to her second session of the Mini class, while Tiny stays in her rec beginner class which is boring her.

I've tried to ask the Jr. coach before if she was satisfied with Tiny and if we could put our recommendation from the pre-team coach into play, and she was very noncommittal about it and wouldn't tell me what was going on or why she didn't think Tiny should go into that group.

At this point, I'm thinking about putting Tiny back (as she has asked for) in the pre-team coach's rec class because she had more fun and will actually get to learn and progress a little bit rather than just do the same thing she's been doing for the past 3 sessions. Unfortunately, in beginner rec classes, there still is a lot of absolute beginners so she won't be able to do as much as if she were in the Jr. class.

I don't have high hopes of her getting past the Jr. Coach, and I'd rather she enjoy herself more than anything else. Keep in mind that Jr. Coach was the one who recommended that Big go into the Jr. class out of rec, but held her back for 2 sessions which another Jr. coach (the one that did the AM class) got into an argument with her about as "she was more than ready." I was told about this after the argument.

I hope I'm not the CGM, but I won't be offended if you tell me that I am. I do not talk to

To be honest, I was planning to allow the kids to go as far as they'd like in gymnastics, whether they stayed on the rec side or went to the competitive side. My main concern is that they are still enjoying it and having fun.

With that in mind, should I just do what I've been doing and ignore the drama and just let Tiny enjoy rec with another coach? Or should I keep her in the Jr. coach's class one more session for the possibility of being selected into the Jr. class? Jr. coach keeps hinting that she will promote her, but hesitates when it comes time to sign up for the next session.
 
Well, I'll venture a response. :) I cringe whenever I hear of coaches holding kids back, whether rec or team, unless there is a really good reason. Bored kids in class is not helping anyone, especially the child, and only serves to keep a monthly fee coming in. If there is another program you could try, I would take your girls there and see if its a better fit for them.

I don't usually advocate switching gyms, but sometimes you have to. Children should be continually challenged in a safe way so that they don't get bored or quit. From what you're describing, you're not going to get very far with this coach, and your daughter is probably miserable. If there's no other place to try gym, insist that she gets a chance at the higher level class, or insist that this coach tell you exactly what is going on. If they won't work with you, why are you paying them your hard-earned money? If your dd loves gymnastics, or used to, this gym will crush that love if they don't let her advance when she is ready and able.

good luck!
 
It brings out the CGM in everyone when you're being told different things by different coaches and you're watching your DD continue in a class that is boring to her. The coaches need to be presenting a unified front and it needs to make sense. "Your daughter needs to be in class x for these reasons and as soon as she can x, y, and z we'll move her into this other class." If you think team is an option for your girls, check out the team. If it seems to be an amazing, well-organized team, then maybe you just need to struggle thought the rec classes in whatever way seems to make the most sense to you. However, if these "right hand doesn't know what the left is doing" issues seems to just be a harbinger of what is to come, then by all means check out your other options!
 
You may be right. Something kept feeling off, especially since the gym has doubled their tuition fees since we started there 2 years ago.

Jr. Coach had a problem with Big because she said that she felt she couldn't be focused in the bigger gym. So I signed her up for a beginner 4 to 6 year old class in the big gym one day a week in addition to her Jr. class, and she excelled. That was when she finally allowed my bored Big to get out of the little gym.

I think it is just a problem with this specific coach, and Big LOVES it there so I am going to just move tiny into another class out of Jr. Coach's domain for Fall. I think I may keep Big at this gym since Jr. coach doesn't have any interaction with them after they go to Mini and move Tiny to the other gym in the Winter session to see how she does.

The other option is to keep Tiny in rec until she is old enough to skip the Jr. class and go straight into the Mini class.

This gym has a lot of different groupings.

Normal progression from rec to team at this gym would look like{rec for a few sessions }--> advanced rec for a few sessions in Jr. --> Advanced rec for about a year or 2 in Mini --> Pre-Team level 1 for about 1 year --> Pre-team level 2 for a 1-2 years --> Team level 3 (and it's about a year or so between levels)
 
Are your sessions 4 or 8 weeks? I probably would talk with the coach one more time before switching anything. Let her know that dd is getting bored and not appearing excited about gym anymore. Ask if she is being held back for the same focus issues as dd1 was. At least then you will have more info to make a decision. If she is 3 and the mini group starts at 4, its not that long to wait it out. in the mean time, talk to your dd about how important it is for her to listen in class. the coaches are not just watching the skills. They want girls to be focused and cooperative, even when it is boring...because Preteam/team can be really boring with increased conditioning, high repetitions, learning routines to perfection.
 
I would think the pretem coach would have more authority to decide which class your dd is in. If preteam coach says she belongs in the advanced class, then she does. I don't get why the rec coach can override the preteam coach's decision. I'd talk to the preteam coach. Does she know this is going on? You have been very patient, more than I would be. It's a lot of money to pay to have your kid stagnate.
 
Part of me says, she's 3, don't worry about it. The other part of me thinks that if she's bored, and there is another option, ignore the rec coach, sign her up for what the preteam coach suggested, and that's that.
 
We went through something very similar and made the break to go to another gym. It was the best decision for my son and we've never looked back. When a child is bored and the coaches can't commit/talk in circles it's time to explore other options.
 
gymgal -- our rec sessions are 11 weeks long with 3 week breaks between them. So 4 sessions is pretty much a year. The Mini group "starts" at 4, but it's more like 4, almost 5. As for the focus issues, Big was tuning out because she was bored and the coach would do the same circuits on the same # week as the previous sessions so she knew she didn't have to listen and could still stick to the script. Tiny is actually a much better listener. She sits quietly, pays attention, and will remember everything you tell her in the right order. Tiny is much more patient than her sister and very quiet.

CreateMagic -- If only I could. Since Jr. coach teaches that class, she'll just kick her out again.

One more thing. With the increase in the Rec class prices, there is only a difference of $10 a month per child between rec classes and pre-team classes even with the practice leotard/etc!!!!

I haven't spoken to Jr. coach in 3 weeks. I was wondering if I was pestering her too much because she would never give me a straight answer as to what Tiny needed to work on other than, "she's doing great." This is such a departure because she would tell me that once Big got her pullups down and worked on her handstand a little more, she could go on to Mini.

There are only 2 gyms within a short distance of me. This one is the better one. The other one is even worse as far as not challenging the kids. It is more of a creative movement class than learning anything at all. But I'm willing to send Tiny there to give her a change of pace.

If I expand my commute to 45 minutes or even an hour away, I have 2 elite gyms and several other gyms to choose from. But, I'm not looking for a college scholarship for the kids, just to let them have fun. When a rec class becomes too easy and ceases to be fun, but the child still loves the sport, I'm not sure what to do.

At almost 5, Big has tried tennis, tae kwon do, swim, dance, music, softball, and soccer. She likes dance and gymnastics, but her main love is gymnastics. I'd just feel terrible if I had to pull her over something out of her control.

Tiny likes gymnastics, but I think this is pushing her away from the sport.
 
Can you go above Jr. Coach to head coach with the information in the original post and see what they can tell you? Be specific and get specifics. Explain that you're worried that Tiny is getting bored and its pushing her away, and you're worried that she'll be distracting if not challenged, and ask what would be the best option for her. Present it to the head coach as looking for advice, not telling them what you want done. You'll do best if you have examples of x, y, z (skill level and behavior you see of your child). Don't compare her to any other child. "Personality conflict" with the coach and wanting to try a new one is a good way to approach situations too. Honestly, there are kids that respond very well for some coaches and not so well to others.
 
Does the other gym have a team program? Evaluate their program by how well their team does and if they have one. MOST gyms have "creative movement" type classes for kids aged 3. A "pre team" track program for 3 year olds is NOT the norm, nor is it really realistic or necessary. It's somewhat of a red flag to me as well that there might be something "off" about the program. The preschool program should be designed to have FUN and fitness (strength building at the child's own pace) as the main priorities, so the children develop motor patterns and strength that will be the foundation for skill-based progression classes at age 5 and up.
 
Does the other gym have a team program? .

According to meet scores, the other gym pretty much has kids dead last in every local meet except for one girl in level 6. Meanwhile, this gym is usually in the top 5, if not the top team in state, which is good for a non-elite gym without Olympians in its past.

Creative movement is what I'm expecting, but having the kids sit on the mat for 30 minutes of a 45 minute class is what I experienced when I went to the other gym before. The current gym at least keeps the kids moving and occupied with 2 instructors for every class.

Just before she turned 3, Tiny was doing cartwheels and could do her skin the cats with no problem. Can she do them now? I highly doubt it. She used to be able to do a forward roll without problems on a beam. Crabwalks, tables, bear walks on the parallel bars, straddle roll on flat ground, candlestick, etc.

Now, these are not pre-team skills, but these are skills they teach over and over again at the rec level. In Jr., they mainly work on strength, preliminary kip drills, and bar pullups as well as perfecting cartwheels and 3/4 handstands.

They do some conditioning in Mini. As far as I can tell, and I don't usually watch the practices, Mini is about the form when doing handstands, more beam work, starting bridges, pullovers etc. I don't know much more than that. I'm just pretty quiet, and I listen and remember what other parents are saying.
 
You're sure there's no other gym? Sometimes they don't come up in google searches...maybe check your state USAG website? Are there any Little Gyms? Neither gym sounds like an appropriate preschool program, as kips and bridges are not appropriate or relevant skills. I find it really odd that they would push a just turned three year old into anything like this. Four years old would make a little more sense, but five would be much more appropriate. It's like preschool versus kindergarten. You can push a kid to do some things like "reading" (memorizing) at as early an age as possible, but the brain is developing at a certain pace and neural connections have to be completed in order for some things to happen. You can't literally speed up development significantly, although you can enrich it in a sense by "creating" more connections. Some programs are a bit confused about this with the thinking of the earlier they push the kids the better because they will "speed up" development. In the end, given similar training, these kids will overall be the same at 7 as 7 year olds who started when they were 5 or 6 and moved to preteam.

It sounds like the last class was more developmentally appropriate. I would DEFINITELY move back into that one for a long time, myself. If she was doing more and more interaction was promoted, it was better for social and emotional development (working independently). This is another problem with putting preschoolers in a "team style" training program since it doesn't promote the skills they need to develop socially and emotionally, as it usually requires more complex and detail instruction where the kids work without talking, etc.

But if you do hear of other options, I'd definitely check them out, because it sounds like your gym has some management problems (coaches fighting and then telling you about it later, raising prices so much, this one coach is doing something different than everyone else with no comment, etc). Just the doubling prices is pretty out there. Usually tuition increases are small at any one time in a stable business.
 
gymdog -- The Jr. class that I'm speaking of does not do kips, but some exercises that strengthen those muscles they will use later if they are going to do kips. They do pullups and then hold themselves up on the bar. They usually don't start there until 3.5. Tiny is actually closer to 4 due to being held back. They do not do bridges until they are almost 5. Big can do bridges, but she figured that out on her own. When I say the ages, they will allow a few at the lower end start there at those ages, but usually if it starts at 3, it's more like 3.5 and if they say they start at 4, it's more like 4.5 Big is almost 5 and going into Kindergarten. I'm not worried she is being started on bridges 3 weeks before the experts say she should. In my opinion, 3 weeks is not a very big difference.

I just learned today from another mom that the rec class I signed Tiny up for in the Fall is taught by compulsory Team coach. She teaches rec classes one day a week, the Jr. coach teaches 3 days a week, and the pre-team coach teaches rec classes another day in the week. I had no idea, but I'm kind of interested to see how she does.

There's tons of gyms in the area if I want to commute over 45 minutes to an hour and a half each way. One elite gym with a couple of ex-Olympians, another elite gym that is aiming for Olympics but with a bad reputation of verbally abusing their gymnasts even in rec, 2 gyms that are combo-gyms that do swim/martial arts/etc etc/ and about 16 other USAG gyms. But within a 15 minute commute, I've got 2.
 

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