Parents Crazy Mom at the meet!!!

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So we went to DD's first meet this weekend. It was in a medium sized gym and there were two seating areas for parents. One area was folding chairs and the other area was bleachers. So as we all know bleachers can be crowded and you get to know the people around you very well by the end of the meet, lol. We had the girls that had competed the day before in the bleachers with us, they stayed to support their team. The girls ranged in age from 6-14. I will admit they were getting up frequently, which can be annying, but they were going to the restroom and snack bar and the older ones were getting up to take the little ones. The kids always said excuse me and thank you as they scooted by everyone.

There was a mom sitting at the very end of the bleachers by the stairs. About 1 hour into the meet as the girls walked past her to go potty she threw her hands up, looked at our group, and said "Oh my God. This is ridiculous. You need to have your children sit down and stop running around. I'm here to watch gymnastics, I don't know about you!" One of the Moms with me told her- "Are you serious? They're little kids and they're not running around. They're going to get food and go potty. Kids do that. You're at a kids sporting event, calm down" After that we tried to ignore her and have the kids go down the other side of bleachers but it was very uncomfortable. She kept giving us dirty looks. She started in on us again and one of our moms told her "that we have class and will not be responding to her drama." Of course that made her even more mad and more derogatory comments about our kids followed. As some of the girls were coming back up the stairs one of our older girls told them not to go that way or they'd get in trouble (referring to the lady). The lady turned around and told the girl ( a child!) that "she is a piece of trash." We were all kind of shocked at this point. The mother of the girl told the lady that she has no place talking to her daughter and to please stop talking to us and our children. For the rest of the meet the lady gave our little kids dirty looks. When one of the 6 year olds accidentally touched her she gave the child a very dirty look and sighed loudly.

These kids were not running wild. They were sitting quietly in the bleachers watching the meet. They weren't kicking anyone, making it hard for anyone to watch, etc. They did get up quite a bit but they're kids and they weren't getting up to run around wild. It was so shocking to me to see another parent act like this and especially in front of the children. I've never seen anything like it! Thought I would share the craziness and see if any of you would have handled it differently. We did speak to someone at the host gym just to give them a head up in case it escalated. They thanked us and apologized for the parent because she was from their gym. From then on one of the gym staff came and sat close to that mother and kept an eye on the situation, which we appreciated. Total craziness!!!
 
I have to admit, I am torn on this one. While it was way out of line for the woman to speak that way to adults and children, I am also annoyed by the jack-in-the-box people at meets. For goodness sakes if you have to get up a million times sit where you won't be bothering people. Nothing bugs me more than when I am videoing my daughter and I have people in front of me who are up and down through it. If I am trying to watch a meet and there's a group of girls who are not competing and "watching" their teammates, if they are sitting in the bleachers they should be respectful of those around them. If they have to go "potty" constantly with a group of girls tagging along/helping them maybe they can find a nice seat on the end of an aisle where they aren't in the way. Gotta say I am not feeling too bad for you or the kids on your team- "excuse me" or not- up and down, up and down at a meet is bothersome to those around you! That woman was out of line calling people "trash" but two wrongs don't make a right- you also need to corral your kids/team IMO.
 
That is too bad that happened......I in no way condon what this lady did or how she acted. it was totally uncalled for and you did the right thing by telling the meet hosts.

However I do want to say I see both sides of the coin. The last meet we were at had plenty of places to sit no need to be crowded. A large team of girls from the previous sessions chose to stay and support teammates. In theroy this is nice however, I highly doubt they saw much of their teammates meet. They sat near us in the middle top of the bleechers. Our team was by the exit so we expected traffic. These girls were about 10-14 and they never sat down for more than about 20 minuets and proceeded to climb over a row of about 5-7 people every time they left. I am not talking 1 0r 2 of them but al 7-8 of them. After 2 hours about half way through the meet we were all very tired of them. The parent with them did nothing to address this.

So some amount of not climbing over folks every 20 minuets or so is needed also. I do not condon being rude to folks and if you think your kids may need to move in and out a bit sit lower in the bleechers. This helps so as not to climb over everyone often. My friends with youngerish kids do this it gives the kids space and keeps them from climbing over folks when they need to move often.

So sorry this happened.....try not let it get you down to much. There are crabs everywhere.
 
Thanks for the replies. I can see both sides too, I just don't think it's ever appropriate to be ugly to children. We sat as close to the end as we could, the lady was the only one between us and the stairs. There were stairs so they only had to go behind her to get to them to walk down. The bleachers were the wide, carpeted kind where the feet of the person above you are right at your back. There wasn't a lower bleacher for feet like in the traditional metal bleachers. So when the girls got up they didn't walk in front of her but went behind. She didn't need to stand up or move, just the person behind her-one of our parents- had to move her feet. So I understand her getting frustrated with them walking behind her but I don't see how it obstructed her view because they were behind her back. We were at the top so the girls were not blocking anyone's view who was not part of our group. I can totally see how it gets annyoing when people are up and down, I get frustrated by that too. But it wasn't blocking anyone's view of watching, taking pictures, etc. I guess what really shocked me was the ugliness. I would hope that if she was that bothered she could have politely asked us if we could keep the girls from getting up so much. That would have been received much better than the ugliness and it wouldn't have made the rest of the meet so uncomfortable that we felt like we couldn't get up to even go to the bathroom because we didn't want her to start yelling again.
 
I have to agree with the others here. I don't think this gal should have addressed the kids or you that way - totally inappropriate and you are right very ugly.

But I too am torn as I can't stand the jack in the box kids at meets either and I have to say if the bleachers were as tight as you say even going behind can be a big annoyance. My suggestion is always try to sit where you won't bother any one if you know you will be up and down throughout the meet with kids and make sure you have other activities for the kids to do that they can sit in the bleachers and do. I see alot of kids with DVD players watching movies - they forget about being bored and wanting to get snacks and go to the bathroom. Most of the kids really don't need to keep going to the bathroom or need that many snacks at a meet that often. Sorry but kids can go to school at 7am and not need a bathroom or snack until lunch they can make it a few hours at a meet with out the snacks that will cause them to need the bathrooms.

I know for me if there were a big group up and down like you described your group was and it was bothering me I would have tried to see if there was another seat I could move to where I could avoid being bothered. I know I have moved because of excessive cheering parents screaming in my ears at the top of their lungs.
 
Definitely a learning experience. We did try to sit as close to the end as possible, will definitely try to get there a little earlier next time so hopefully we're more successful with that. We don't go back to that gym again so who knows what seating will be like at the next one. Thanks for the insight everyone. I really do try to look at both sides in every situation. I appreciate all the advice. :)
 
The woman was wrong to address the children like this, but I say totally fine to ask the adults to get a hand on this. I have so many ruined videos because of kids and adults who walk right in front of you...or worse stop right in your way. I get so mad. The worst ones are the awards presentations where there is inevitably a parent in the front row who stands to take her picture...thus ruining everyone else's shot who is behind her (which is everyone because she is in the front row!) I guess I remember being told to sit through mass which lasted over an hour--without fidgeting, and we did it. I really do sympathize with you for how unpleasant this woman was, but I do wish kids were taught to sit still for a while so as not to disturb everyone around them.
 
Mom acted badly. Period.

She could have moved if it was so awful. Anyway, a suggestion. Maybe have parents work on monitoring the situation. Let the kids up at various times depending on what is going on in the meet. During the warmups for each event, any lulls in the action, or even a break on a particular apparatus that is in the line of vision of where you are sitting to minimize the interruptions. If there is a break in the action suggest to the little ones that now would be a good time to use the restroom or get a snack. Try to discourage up and downs that appear to have no reason. Ultimately it is a event for children, and they have a right to be there and to leave their seat every once and awhile. But the parent should also pay attention to how it is affecting the people around them. It sounds like you tried to minimize the situation by having them exit a different way etc. She just was extra grumpy and rude about it.
 
"White trash?" Really?

I am horrified at the idea that I would have had to explain to my daughter what that woman could have possibly meant when she called my child "white trash." No matter how badly the children behaved, that ill-tempered woman was the adult, and as such, it was her responsibility to be the ADULT in that situation. Perhaps she should have spoken to the adult chaperones of the children and teens; maybe she could have moved herself to a different spot. Doesn't matter, there was absolutely no excuse for the verbal abuse (and yes, I classify calling a child "white trash" as abuse) levied onto the girls. No matter how irritated/mad as hell/angry you are that a child might have been blocking your view as your filmed or watched the meet, imagine your horror if you'd have overheard a woman calling your daughter "white trash."
 

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