Parents DD officially invited to join pre-team...and we're not sure.

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I've posted a few times about my oldest daughter, who is five years old. She started gymnastics last June, and moved up quickly through the rec levels these last few months. The coach mentioned pre-team, so we filled out the interest sheet last fall. Today I received an email inviting her to join pre-team.

Our gym doesn't compete until Level 5, so their pre-team program is broken up into three levels - Training Team 1 (1 day a week), Training Team 2 (2 days a week), and Training Team 3/Level 4 (3 days a week). DD was invited to join Training Team 2. She would go 2 days a week for 2.5 hours at a time.

I'm just...nervous. She LOVES gymnastics, and that's all she wants to do. She's a hard worker, and a great listener. It's just such a commitment - both time-wise and financially (Training Team 2 is $233/month). I asked her what she wants to do and she was nervous about not knowing the other girls or the coach. I'm pretty sure the hours aren't the issue, as she wants to go all the time.

Our family and friends are against it (not that we let them make our decisions). They said it too much for a five year old (she'll be six in two weeks), too much money, she'll burnout, etc. None of them have/had kids who do gymnastics.

What are your thoughts?
 
I asked her what she wants to do and she was nervous about not knowing the other girls or the coach. I'm pretty sure the hours aren't the issue, as she wants to go all the time.
It's easy enough to do it for a few weeks and then go back to the other class. If her reservations are that she doesn't know the people, give her a chance to get to know the people.

Our family and friends are against it (not that we let them make our decisions). They said it too much for a five year old (she'll be six in two weeks), too much money, she'll burnout, etc. None of them have/had kids who do gymnastics.
I hear that from family and friends all the time. So far, DD loves it and begs to go more than she already does. If her love for it changes, we'll scale back or find something else. It may happen tomorrow, it may never happen, but my guess is that it will come from something outside of gymnastics (boys, friends, etc).
 
It can't hurt to try it for a month and see how your DD does.

As far as the family and friends comments go - if they aren't a "gym family" that is about all you hear.

You do need to think about this though. Going the team track is a big commitment in time, money and sacraficing events for practice and meets. It defintily can be your families way of life especially as she progresses up in the levels. the higher the level the more commitment.

My DD started at 3yo on the pre-team and was L4 by 6yo she is now L7 and from Thanksgiving until the end of May almost every weekend there is a meet somewhere and now at the optional levels there is also travel (hotels, airfare, big meet fees, etc). We don't plan the winter/spring weekends until we get the meet schedule. DD has missed sleep overs, B-day parties and other "fun" friend events but she loves gymnastics and for her missing those things aren't a big deal. She does go to some of this stuff but not all.

You have to decide if the "team lifestyle" is somthing you would be able to do
 
We had those same concerns when we first started down this path. You do need to realize that the time, energy (both mental and physical for parents and kid), and money commitment will only increase over time as she moves up in the levels. And the farther they get down this path the harder it is to stop it or say no. Those are just some of the things I wish we had known when we started. That being said, I knew that if we never gave dd a shot that I would regret it and my dd likely would to. It was something dd loved with all her little 6 year old heart and she desparately wanted to do it. i grew up never being allowed to do the things I wanted to do, so I couldn't say no.

And here we are 5 years and thousands of dollars later and she still loves it as much as she ever did, she wants to do gymnastics in college, she wants to be a gym coach when she grows up and eventually a gym owner, but thinks maybe she will become a physical therapist so that will help her be a better gym coach and owner in the future. I am sure she would have found another passion had I not let her do gymnastics, but I am so glad I said yes and am helping her fulfill her dreams.
 
Well, it IS a lot of money. We pay that much at level 6 for my daughter to go 15 hours a week! But then we're in a semi-rural-ish area (a town with a large state university but sort of in the middle of nowhere). I know that in more urban areas where rents and salaries need to be higher, the cost to do just about anything is higher as well. At that price for pre-team, I can only imagine what it costs as she moves up through the levels. Before you commit, I would say to figure out, not only if you can afford it now, but if you will be able to continue to afford it as the costs increase (figuring in stuff like meet fees, competition leotards, travel expenses for meets, etc.). Will there be negative consequences on your family's finances and/or on your other children (if you have any)? Of course, you don't know if she will want to continue to team, but it would be sad to have her get that far and WANT to continue and for you then to have to tell her that you can't afford it.

As for the rest, if she's in gymnastics for the long haul, just get used to other people saying that it's too many hours. It is what it is. If she wants to continue on the team path, that's the way to go. If people tell you she'll burn out or that it's too many hours say, "That may be true. As soon as she doesn't love it any more, we'll let her try something else. But for right now, this is what she wants to do, and we're going to support her." Nobody whose kid doesn't do gymnastics will "get it." Year-round practices (there is no "gymnastics season." There is "competition season" and then there's the rest of the year when you're getting ready for competition season), high number of hours, high costs... it's crazy, for sure. If you had told me I'd let my kid be involved in something this intense and expensive, I would have told you that you were nuts. And yet, here I am, writing another check for my 11-year-old's upcoming States meet, looking at the summer schedule which will be 25 hours a week (at $275/month... after reading your post, I'll consider that a bargain!). And as soon as she doesn't love it any more, we'll let her try something else. But for right now, this is what she wants to do, and we're going to support her.
 
Looks like a lot of us were posting very similar things at the same time! ;)
 
The hours seem about right for pre-team, and most 5 year olds can handle those hours very well. It is certainly way more than I ever paid for gym. It is a good way to see if she is cut out for team, as clearly five hours a week is just the very beginning. Gymnastics is just a sport that requires a lot of hours to train skills well.

This is a decision that needs to be made by you and your husband, friends and family have never understood the commitment that gymnastics requires.
 
Thank you for the replies!!!

I emailed the gym and asked if she could meet with the coaches or try out a class, and they invited her to workout with the team on Wednesday. We'll be going to that, and I'll talk with the coaches afterward. Hopefully that will be a big help in making our decision.

Finances is definitely our main issue. We're in a major metro area in an upper midwestern state, and the gym is pretty good, so I understand why it costs more. They've have a wonderful history of gymnasts getting college scholarships, which is really nice, and their teams do pretty well. I feel like it's one of those things that's so good for a child - learning commitment and dedication at an early age while still doing something you love. That's something we really want to encourage.

I think my next step is to talk to my husband and go over our budget. If we can get that figured out, we'll see how DD does on Wednesday. If we can make the financial commitment, it's up to her.

I just did not expect this last summer when I signed her up. lol
 
Yikes on the fee. That IS high!
Let her try the work out. If you can swing it into the budget, let her try pre team for a month or two...Pre team is a great way to figure out if competitive gym is going to fit into your family lifestyle-without all the team commitment yet. As a family, you will be able to decide if it is something she can continue doing and then venture up to team. Otherwise, she can always return to the rec classes or do tumbling. Or cheer, or dance, or any other number of sports she may have an interest in.

My dd didn't step into a gym until right around her 6th birthday. She immediately started going 4 hrs a week, then was on preteam at 6 hours a week. Then team at 9 hrs a week by age 7. Every time she was moved up I would think, "okay, we'll try this and see how it goes..." If you just keep that attitude, I think it will all work out-knowing that you always have that option to cut back if it seems too much. I'm still waiting to be told that she wants to cut back or try something else. So far, she only loves gym-but I realize that could change at any time.

Congrats on getting the invite to preteam...let the rollercoaster ride begin... :D
 
My DD joined pre-team last year when she was 5. She did fine with 4 hours a week (2 hrs / 2 days). You will need to give her some time to adjust though. My DD wanted to go back to her old class for about a month since she didn't really know any of the girls, and they were all together for a while so it was not so easy for her to make friends. And she was also very tired getting used to the extra time and conditioning. After about 6 weeks and a couple other new girls joining, she did much better. So it did take quite some time for her to adjust. She loves it now that she has lots of friends, and she can easily handle the 2 hours. Also, I now have a snack ready for DD right after practice or in the car (yogurt or string cheese usually). It helps take the edge off the fatigue and hunger :).
 
Our family and friends are against it (not that we let them make our decisions). They said it too much for a five year old (she'll be six in two weeks), too much money, she'll burnout, etc. None of them have/had kids who do gymnastics.

Four years down the track and with two kids in competitive gymnastics and I still hear this ALL the time! If you they are not a gym parent they just do not get it. I've learnt to smile politely and move on to another topic. I never ever voluntarily bring up the number of training hours in conversation with other parents unless they also have kids in gymnastics... or swimming, swimming mums seem to get it ;)
 
Every time she was moved up I would think, "okay, we'll try this and see how it goes..."

That has always been my attitude. I have no idea if DD will stick at it long-term but I like her having something she has to work hard at, I think the discipline is good for her. My DD went from rec to pre-comp at 6 and it wasn't a lot of hours but she found it very tiring for a while because they trained so much harder.
 
Like Nicki, my DD moved from rec to comp just after she had turned six, again it wasn't a lot of hours but the intensity of training was a lot harder. I would say it took her a month to six weeks to adapt.

The other thing she had to adapt to was the difference in coaching and the expectations. At her gym rec was about fun, fitness and learning the skill. Team gymnastics was still about fun, but there was more emphasis on fitness levels and it was about trying to perfect the skill. So it was a totally different mind set that she had to find.

With both my gymnasts, we still take it year by year and level by level. Even if they quit tomorrow and never set foot inside a gym again they have still learnt valuable lessons from their time in gymnastics.
 
Everyone has said all the right things and I don't have much to add other than we have all been in your shoes at one point and you are not alone. Also, you are asking all the right questions and handling it great.

Being a gym mom can be a lonely endeavor until you get hooked into the gym community. All of my friends think I am insane for letting her be in the gym so much and think that I am depriving her of something magical that all the other kids are getting that she is not. It's total crap, but you just have to come up with your one line answer and move on. And once you get to know all the other team parents, you will have a support network and that helps a lot.

My most recent example of the value of gymnastics came two weeks ago. I picked my daughter up from school and she told me about her music class that day. Her teacher asked if anyone played an instrument and would like to come up and play for the class. So, we are very casually learning to play the piano at home, very casually and I'm just going to say she's not very good. Not that she couldn't be, but she doesn't practice and I just don't feel right pushing her in this right now (gym and school are already a lot) so she drives this one entirely - all on her to practice and ask me for a lesson. Anyhoo, she says that she raised her hand and went right up there and played in front of everyone. She also said it went very badly and that she had started on the wrong note and got all screwed up.

What I loved is that she did that. My quiet shy daughter got up there in front of everyone and didn't even flinch about it and when it went terribly wrong she took it gracefully and examined what had gone wrong and wasn't upset or embarrassed, just aware that if she wanted to be a better piano player she was going to have to practice more.

Those are the values and lessons of gymnastics and no one outside of it will understand it. I wouldn't trade those kind of life lessons for play dates and random after school activities.

Good luck with your decision, everyone has given you great advice. And about the cost, we live in an expensive area as well. Prices are different all over the country so it is all relative. Thinking long term about the financial impact is important though, because if she ends up getting hooked, good luck getting her to stop anytime soon. They get pretty attached. :)

I am a huge advocate of pre-team as a great way to test the team waters. It is a dabble in the extended hours and a more rigorous coaching environment. It's also still easy to change your mind at that point.

I hope she has a great time at practice tomorrow!
 
Hope the practice today went well! I agree with others--people who aren't in gymnastics (or similar sport) will always say it's too much time and way too much money. My reply is that it isn't their time or their money (or their child!). You will know if your daughter can't handle it. And only you can know if your finances can afford it. I would definitely look at the costs of team as you move up. Do you think you'll be able to handle a doubling of the cost within the next few years? (well, maybe 5 years).

Keeping all that in mind--I always vote for letting them try it and see how they like it.
 
I agree, don't talk about the number of hours your daughter spends at the gym, you'll def get raised eyebrows! My 8 yo spends 13 hrs a week at the gym. However, she has friends who spend 2 hrs at scouts, 6-8 hrs at sports, and 1 hr at a music lesson, so they are just as busy.
 
Thanks, everyone!

Practice on Wednesday went well. DD definitely wasn't used to the amount of conditioning they do, but her coach said that will come with time. After practice we talked to her, and she decided she wanted to do give team a try.

Friday was our first 'official' practice, and it went well! The girls are all around her age, and they all seemed to be having fun. It's definitely more serious than rec, but the coaches are great with them and have no issues with them being goofy as long as they are working hard and paying attention at the appropriate times.

I think this must be the time of year girls move up a level, because I spoke to two other moms whose girls had also just been invited to the team. We were all nervous. lol. There was a huge packet of information and forms to fill out. Our gym has a booster club, in which membership is mandatory for team families. Do you all have anything like that?

I think that's it! Sorry not to update sooner, but the last few days have been a whirlwind! :)
 
Had to quickly chime in...my tiny DD (5 yrs old) was invited from rec to pre-team in September (doubling her hours). I thought, no way is she going to sit there and pay attention that long and work on conditioning. Well, I was completely wrong. She loves every minute of practice, gets mad if she is late or has to miss. She was just invited to train for team and again will be doubling her hours...again, I worry that it will be too much but I will let her be the guide. She will also be going twice a week for 2 hrs, similar to your DD. I think it is a good amount of hours, definitely not too much as long as it's still fun for your DD (sometimes conditioning can be fun! :))
Hope it continues to go well. My tiny DD starts her new schedule in 3 weeks. I'll let everyone know how it goes!
 
Ah what I'd give for 2 days a week for 2 1/2 hours each....but that ship has sailed many moons ago. I do have to say though the tuition rate that you quote does seem a bit high for 20 hours a month ($223 ish...roughly 10 bucks an hour) ...it seems like they are still charging you at a class rate (team rates seem high initially but hourly they are much lower) .. out of curiousity, what would be the team rate for say a Level 7? with this type of rate in preteam, it's something I would check out before she gets immersed and loves it and you then find out it's 600 bucks a month!
 

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