Parents First post - very different gym children cause me to stress!

[Vikspoolie]

First of all Ive enjoyed lurking and reading on here for a few months but I fear now I need help ! And its not even the kids its me!

Let me explain, my daughter started gym in the UK in rec classes age 4. She was a slow burn and stayed in rec until her 6th birthday when she moved to pre team (4 piece) suddenly she's flying ! after being over looked for 2 years she is suddenly really coming on BUT she is always going to be one of those kids who has to work hard for it.

Contrast, my son, watched my daughter for a year then casually said he thought he might give it a go. Age 8 he did 3 rec lessons and was moved to pre team and is now about to compete. He doesn't try, he resists conditioning etc and sits down on the nearest mat when its not his go, but he is so quick at picking things up he is more than holding his own.

They both had their first in house comp. My boy got a bronze which i was delighted with, fine. My daughter got a 4th and for some reason I am gutted. I cant get perspective on it at all. I feel like the kids who got higher than her dont put the work in she does but got lucky or "pulled it out the bag" on the day which doesnt feel fair. but then I think thats probably what other parents think about my son ! Its really tough, I dont like to be competative but I'm disclovering I clearly am.

Anyway, its less about me needing advice, more that I need another gym mum to say "there there you little mentalist" and give me some lovely tales of when similar things have happened!

I'm off to read the thread on "how not to be a pushy parent" :-(

 

[Iwannabemargo]

hmmmm, the inner CGM is strong in this one !

lol

Seriously, you see the work your daughter puts in and you want her to be rewarded for that.

At this age/stage natural talent will win out over hard work - but that will only take your son so far - especially when he starts competing 6 pieces. My boy was very similar and I told him to not cheat on his conditioning as he would regret it when he grew.

He gave up gym at 12 when he grew and his strength to weight ratio suffered.

Her hard work will pay off soon - just enjoy her 4th (really well done) and think how proud you will be when she gets her first medal.

 

[Jen H.]

Hard work beats talent, when talent doesn't work hard.

That is something that I tell my slow and steady girl all the time ( well really I tell myself this about her).

 

[Committed]

Remember, your DD is younger than your DS. Yes, she has put in more time, but it was as a 4-5yo. Those ages are more focused on fun and learning very basic skills. When children start later, they can do most of the things 4-5 yo's can already do. I know you feel badly for your DD (though you shouldn't), and you should be proud of your DS.

I have a 6yo hard worker, but in her case, her work is paying off. The kids that goof off and don't put in the work just aren't progressing as quickly. However, from what I understand, she will be joining a team where there will be a few level repeaters. She will be bumped down the totem pole of "talent". DD does better when she has someone who she needs to 'catch', skill wise. I will probably always think she works the hardest (whether it's true or not).

Just relax and enjoy the show. Just beware of the other CGMs that will pull you into their craziness!! When you're having your own doubts, you can get sucked in very easily!

 

[Jenny]

That is a tough one! Welcome to Chalk Bucket.

All parents go through this watching their child compete in sports. Either your kid is the hard worker you want to be rewarded or you have the pull it out on the day kid that needs a dose of reality. Just to compound it you have both! But the fact is eventually hard work does pay off so hang in there. And your son has a great role model to help him understand how to be successful long term. So they both could be winners in the end!

 

[Vikspoolie]

You guys are great and lol lol lol I wannabemargo ! I feel I am going to settle right in *pours drink and squeezes in on sofa* we have some horrid CGM's one in particular who has a child in my daughters group (she beat her ;-))

The head coach persuaded me to train as a coach, I've only got my uk level 1 so far, level 2 in Feb, but I think that made it harder to watch - I could see the bits they were doing wrong! And she lost out on silver by 0.5 (0.25 splits between silver bronze and fourth. She's really angry that she didn't get a medal "just a lousy bookmark" (she got a ribbon!!! Lmao) but she's cross with herself - no one else. So I have administered cuddles, given praise, made a "top three things FH wants to achieve next" pictorial with her (back w'over, circle up and c'wheel on beam) and we are going back to the basics, why did we start gym. To make friends, keep fit, learn a new skill and to HAVE FUN. Thanks for the support x

 

[Iwannabemargo]

Its hard, mine (Pink and Fluffy) is uber competitive and she hates not medaling. It didn't help that she used to win everything. Going out of county has been a real eye opener to her.

 

[Ex member]

First of all Ive enjoyed lurking and reading on here for a few months but I fear now I need help ! And its not even the kids its me!

Let me explain, my daughter started gym in the UK in rec classes age 4. She was a slow burn and stayed in rec until her 6th birthday when she moved to pre team (4 piece) suddenly she's flying ! after being over looked for 2 years she is suddenly really coming on BUT she is always going to be one of those kids who has to work hard for it.

Contrast, my son, watched my daughter for a year then casually said he thought he might give it a go. Age 8 he did 3 rec lessons and was moved to pre team and is now about to compete. He doesn't try, he resists conditioning etc and sits down on the nearest mat when its not his go, but he is so quick at picking things up he is more than holding his own.

They both had their first in house comp. My boy got a bronze which i was delighted with, fine. My daughter got a 4th and for some reason I am gutted. I cant get perspective on it at all. I feel like the kids who got higher than her dont put the work in she does but got lucky or "pulled it out the bag" on the day which doesnt feel fair. but then I think thats probably what other parents think about my son ! Its really tough, I dont like to be competative but I'm disclovering I clearly am.

Anyway, its less about me needing advice, more that I need another gym mum to say "there there you little mentalist" and give me some lovely tales of when similar things have happened!

I'm off to read the thread on "how not to be a pushy parent" :-(

Hi, my youngest dd was like yours and did 2 years of rec before being invited up to a development group after it seemed she was overlooked. My dd has only been in her new group for 2 weeks so its all new, she is enjoying it so far and seems to cope with the conditioning, she has just turned 7 (started rec at 5) and goes once a week for 2 1/2 hours at the moment.

I also have an older dd aged 9 who started disability trampolining late June and after a quick 5 minuet assessment in July was invited to the disability development gymnastics group and has been doing it for 4 months, had her first competition in October and got medals on all 3 pieces she competed, Silver on Vault, Bronze on Floor and Beam.

I have created an group for preteam parents in the Social Groups section, please feel free to join.

I am from the Uk as too

 

[iwannacoach]

hmmmm, the inner CGM is strong in this one !.........

Hmmm. Worry you should not. Have she will, the rewards in time.

Gymnastics is a sport you have to love to do well over the long term, and talent has far less to do with it than you may think. Why? Because the kid that loves doing it will persistently work hard and try to correct as the coaches indicate.

They tend to buy in to what the coach is selling, and that's how gymnastics wealth is accumulated.