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Gym Decisions and Need Advice

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Gymbugs

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My Daughter is six and very strong. She’s been training for TOPs testing when she turns 7. She is at a small gym with great Elite results. They qualified more kids than any small gym in the country. However, we have been upset lately with the gym for decisions regarding holding back team girls when they have all their next level skills. One being her sister. They want the girls to get high scores. My daughter wants to advance. It’s a big deal at the gym and the atmosphere is upsetting.

We are upset with other things to. We are considering moving gyms. There is a gym much closer to my house that is much cheaper. It’s rated one of the top large gyms in the NE. They have an exceptional elite program and a ton of level tens. However, they strongly suggest homeschooling. They have their own homeschool program. Also, they are very severe in their coaching methods and I don’t want them to “break” my daughters. That is why we didn’t go there sooner. Out of frustration with our current gym (where my kids are happy but we aren’t) we brought my kids into the other gym to be evaluated. They will move up my older one. She deserves and wants that. They were extremely impressed with my six year old and want her on the elite path. She will be their youngest one training for this on top of JO practice she’ll train one on one twice a week. This gym has several girls with developmental team invites.

My question is...is it worth it? What do we do when we are so angry with a gym for numerous reasons that you don’t want to pay or go in there but the kids still like it? Would you risk leaving for a better but more severe program? I think the bigger gym has a better chance to get her far and more connections. It’s also cheaper and closer but I don’t want them yelled at the way I’ve heard. I want them to be happy. I’ve noticed the current gym yelling lately pretty much just as much though. But the larger gym has parents leaving saying they are verbally abusive. Do we talk to the coaches at the big gym about our worries and expectations? We may burn bridges at the current gym and not be able to go back. The owners dislike the larger gym. I’m so torn.
 

amiandjim

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Why are they not moving the girls up? Is it really because they want high scores? What levels and ages are we talking about? I certainly wouldn’t take my young, talented child to the new gym. That’s a recipe for disaster, and exactly the reason we keep hearing all these stories of abuse. Parents think that’s what they have to do to help their children “succeed.”’ It’s not.
 

Gymbugs

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Why are they not moving the girls up? Is it really because they want high scores? What levels and ages are we talking about? I certainly wouldn’t take my young, talented child to the new gym. That’s a recipe for disaster, and exactly the reason we keep hearing all these stories of abuse. Parents think that’s what they have to do to help their children “succeed.”’ It’s not.
 

Gymbugs

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Yes. They say they want the girls to get high levels and lots of medals so they are holding them back. They say it’s for them and their confidence but it’s really for the gym I believe.
 

Gymbugs

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I would look for a different gym. I wouldn't be happy with either of the gyms you've described.
I wish we could but there are no other gyms with competitive programs in the area.
 

Gymbugs

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I wish we could but there are no other gyms with good competitive programs in the area.
 

amiandjim

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We need more information here. Did these girls have a largely unsuccessful first year at their levels? It is very different for a gym to hold back girls who say scored 32-35 the first year and want them to have success than for a gym to hold back girls scoring 37+ their first year.
 

Gymbugs

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We need more information here. Did these girls have a largely unsuccessful first year at their levels? It is very different for a gym to hold back girls who say scored 32-35 the first year and want them to have success than for a gym to hold back girls scoring 37+ their first year.
 

Gymbugs

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No not at all. They scored high eights and low nines mostly at every event.
 

amiandjim

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No not at all. They scored high eights and low nines mostly at every event.
So, to some gyms, that’s a successful season. To others, it’s not. I know quite a few gyms that want an average of 36 or even as high as 38 (which is crazy!) to move up. I would consider having a meeting with the coaches or gym owner and discuss your concerns. I would NEVER consider moving my daughter to a gym that you already view as abusive and have had multiple parents say is abusive. No way.
 

DebraNC

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So, to some gyms, that’s a successful season. To others, it’s not. I know quite a few gyms that want an average of 36 or even as high as 38 (which is crazy!) to move up. I would consider having a meeting with the coaches or gym owner and discuss your concerns. I would NEVER consider moving my daughter to a gym that you already view as abusive and have had multiple parents say is abusive. No way.
We have a local gym in the area that has their team move up policies published on their website because they refuse to argue about them. You have to earn a 36 at a minimum of one sanctioned meet and have all next level skills before being allowed to move up for compulsories, for optionals you have to have a 37 at a meet to move up. I think it's a little bit bananas but they're open about it.
 

Gymbugs

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We have a local gym in the area that has their team move up policies published on their website because they refuse to argue about them. You have to earn a 36 at a minimum of one sanctioned meet and have all next level skills before being allowed to move up for compulsories, for optionals you have to have a 37 at a meet to move up. I think it's a little bit bananas but they're open about it.
She did get a 37.5 at one meet. She did well...
 

my4buffaloes

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You don't say what levels your girls are currently. Scores at precious levels don't matter so much if they don't have the skills for the next level. Also, is this a blanket decision or a decision for each girl individually? I would have a meeting to discuss your children alone, don't mention anyone else.

I would not switch gyms if there are no other options. I am curious though - are there truly no other gyms or just no other Elite track gyms?
 
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Gymbugs

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You don't say what levels your girls are currently. Scores at precious levels don't matter so much if they don't have the skills for the next level. Also, is this a blanket decision or a decision for each girl individually? I would have a meeting to discuss your children alone, don't mention anyone else.

I would not switch gyms if there are no other options. I am curious though - are there truly no other gyms or just no other Elite track gyms?
She does have the skills for the next level. She muscles up her kip still but just got it. She should be moving to level 4. Over half her team got held back. All but one have their skills for level 4. All but a different one scored over 37 last season as a level 3. This is the first year the gym is doing this. We don’t want to pay for them to repeat a level they proficient in because they muscle up their kip. They just got their kips this summer so they are already getting better.

There are rec gyms. They have two other competitive gyms but one has a very weak program and no elite. The girls there are very sloppy. The other one is an hour away.
 

Gymbugs

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You don't say what levels your girls are currently. Scores at precious levels don't matter so much if they don't have the skills for the next level. Also, is this a blanket decision or a decision for each girl individually? I would have a meeting to discuss your children alone, don't mention anyone else.

I would not switch gyms if there are no other options. I am curious though - are there truly no other gyms or just no other Elite track gyms?
Oh and my six year old is going to level 3. She just turned six a week ago.
 
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