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For Parents Heartbreak

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JessMom

Member
Proud Parent
Mar 6, 2009
479
3 weeks before nationals . . . on the day the meet fees went in . . . the gym fired my daughters coach.

I am speechless and my daughter is heartbroken.

they told the girls they don't need a coach that the coach only sets the equipment and spots . . that's all. they can do this themselves.

Basically we spent THOUSANDS of dollars to travel to nationals without the coach she has been working with all year - without the coach that worked every meet all year.

The gym is SHOCKED we are unhappy and concerned. They have 3 weeks to get the other coach ready. Of course they will know the girls bar settings etc . . . in the mean time when the coach they fired wasn't in on Monday none of the equipment was adjusted and last night they yelled at a girl for a bad vault - she told them maybe if it was on my setting I wouldn't kill myself.

My daughter, who is SEVEN, asked me "Are they going to hire someone that does something?"

Several people walked out - not to return. others are trying to get meet fees and airline tickets refunded. Our concerns were met with indifference and disrespect. As if we were ridiculous . . after all the girls don't NEED a coach.

My peanut wants to go anyway . . . I am very worried.

Just needed to vent. It was a long night filled with drama.

Did I mention that 3 weeks before nationals the workout schedule is cut back . . . and costing extra . . . and was required :mad:
 

gymmomntc2e6

Moderator/Proud Parent
Aug 25, 2007
2,842
North Carolina
wish I had some advise / words of wisdom. My jaw is still on the floor. All I can seem to muster at the moment is ((((( HUGS ))))) for your family and especially your DD and her teammates.

This is truly awful.
 

bogwoppit

Former Admin
Gold Membership
Former Gymnast
Feb 26, 2007
16,760
Country
Canada
I am speechless! Totally unproffesional and dangerous.

I'd jank my kids out of that gym and not look back. Parents need to let their feet and wallets do the talking. To put your child at risk and to care so little for the families that have made the huge commitment to travel to nationals is disgusting.

Jess must be so sad, but you have to put her safety first, she is doing big skills for a little one and needs to feel safe and be spotted correctly.

So sorry this is happening to you now, I be going for the refunds or taking anice trip somewhere else. She is little and will have many other great opportunities. Maybe this is time to look at that new gym.
 
C

cher062

Guest
WHAT!!!!! I can't believe that!! What gym would think that this is OK. Of course the kids need a coach. Not only do they need a coach they need one they trust and feel comfortable with. That is half of the confidence the kids have. Unless there was some major child endangerment issue I can't even imagine why a gym would do this.

I think I would still have DD go to nationals as they worked hard to get there and they are looking forward to the event. But I think I might be in the market for a new gym as soon as its over. I would be looking NOW so you can start right up as soon as you get off the plane from Nationals.

It's gyms and management like that, that give this sport a bad name.
 

ginnymac

Parent/Coach
Coach
Former Gymnast
Proud Parent
Jun 26, 2008
386
From reading your posts, isn't this the gym that you are leaving anyway? If so, I would not let her go to nationals with this gym.

Parents could probably pay the fired coach to come to nationals with the girls...he is still registered as a coach, just will be unaffiliated? Check it out
 

JessMom

Member
Proud Parent
Mar 6, 2009
479
They don't know if they are going to be able to get anyone's meet fees back. We have to ask them to try today if we're not going. But if you say you're not going and they can't get them back I'm scared they are going to treat DD differently.

Yes, we are leaving this gym immediately after Nationals. I have been spoken and treat with such disrespect. it is only for my daughter that I remained calm.

They found out some girls tried / looked at another gym and they were cornered . . yes, they cornered 12 year old girls and wanted to know if they were staying or going and told them how disloyal, dishonest they were etc etc

I don't know what to do - I really don't.

I'm sick to my stomach

they are not answering any questions - all our questions are stupid
 
N

NOG

Guest
Wow! How totally unprofessional! I'm so glad that you had already made the decision to switch gyms before this.
I realize that Jess had been competing USAIGC, so maybe the rules are different than with USAG, but you should be able to switch now and compete at Nationals with the new gym (unless new gym doesn't do USAIGC). My dd does USAG, and she had a teammate switch to her gym 2 weeks before STATES and was able to compete for the her new gym at States. They just petitioned to have her USAG number changed to the new gym (no problem). If this AT ALL an option for Jess, I would RUN to the new gym now. Why wait? Unless the new gym doesn't compete in her format?

I really feel for you and Jess! Good Luck working through this situation!
 

monkeymom

New Member
May 14, 2009
10
The firing of the coach was the gym's decision, and therefore they need to fix the situation and deal with the consequences of their actions. This seems highly suspicious; especially if they did not attempt to have a "moving forward" type of team or gym meeting to at least discuss the future and particularly nationals with with parents! More importantly, if your gym does not have concerns about a 7 yr old competing without a coach, I would definitely look elsewhere.
 

gymjoy

Member
Jan 31, 2009
410
Oh My Gosh - I think I'd be running away.
I can't believe they said the girls don't need a coach - especially the little ones. At my dd's gym the older/upper level girls spend some time alone training, but never the younger/lower level girls.
While I understand your dilemma with the money spent and your dd's desire to go, I don't think I would risk it. These people don't seem to care about feelings or safety.
Your situation really stinks.
Best of luck.
 

mariposa

Proud Parent
Proud Parent
Sep 25, 2007
3,529
Country
USA
Personally, I wouldn't trust this gym with my daughter. It is obvious they do not care about the girls. If they did, they would have had a huge meeting, plan, been sympathetic to the girls, etc. They could have waited til July to fire this coach, unless of course it was something really big, which I doubt or you would have likely heard rumors or suspected already yourself. They have shown this kind of disregard in the past and I would not trust them not to do it again.

Tough situation. I can understand how Jess would want to go to Nationals after all her hard work, but I don't know that I would even let my daughter stay at a gym that thought so little of her and her teammates. I would probably demand a refund for June tuition and either take a break from gym for a month/or start at the new gym now. Can you find the old coach? Could he/she take the girls to Nationals? That would be another option, but I think I would just take my kid and run.

If I couldn't get a refund of airfare/hotel, I would go to where Nationals was going to be and do something amazingly fun with my daughter to celebrate what a wonderful year she had. Go to a salon, get manicure/pedi. Hang out at the beach, just really have a great time.

You have a hard decision to make. Good luck figuring out what to do. I am sure whatever you decide, it will be the right one. Hoping things will work out positively.
 

JessMom

Member
Proud Parent
Mar 6, 2009
479
Cancelled

Hotel and Plane canceled . . . costing me 150 ea ticket but saving me thousands

Left a message for the gym telling them I'm not going and want all my fees refunded.

I'm done

And the more I say that - the more relaxed and better I feel.

I can't let my daughters memories of the gym be tainted. I want her last memories to be happy and fun

thank you all for your support
 
B

bigtiny

Guest
I think you made the right decision. Jess is so talented - she has many, many more successful years ahead of her at a gym that will treat her (and you) with respect. Your Chalk Bucket family is behind you! :)
 

bogwoppit

Former Admin
Gold Membership
Former Gymnast
Feb 26, 2007
16,760
Country
Canada
Good choice, and this is exactly why we are all here for each other. This is a very tough time for you and we all want to help. Jess has far to go in gymnastics and she will reach her potential in a gym with coaches and owners who care about her and all the gymnasts.
 
F

flippymonkeysmom

Guest
Very good choice. I am so sorry you and your dd had to go through that. Unless they are planning on writing a book, "What NOT to do when running a business" - I can't imagine what the heck those people were thinking.
 

mariposa

Proud Parent
Proud Parent
Sep 25, 2007
3,529
Country
USA
Tough decision, but I think you made the best decision given the circumstances. Jess deserves to be in a gym that has her best interest at heart and you deserve to get what you pay for. Hope Jess will be okay. I am sure she is sad, but one day, if not already, she will understand.

I would still do something really fun that weekend with her. A girls day out or something. Buy her a special leo to remember the occasion, something that she really loves and will look at and know she qualified for nationals.

Hope the new gym works out. I am sure that Jess will thrive in any situation as long as she is challenged. :)
 

hunde2

Active Member
Nov 5, 2007
664
Sorry to hear you are going through all this in such a stressfull time.We went through something similiar.My daughter went to Level 9 Ntionals with a coach that has never once coached them on beam and only a few times on bars and vault.
I believe it does make a difference who is coaching them at the meet.
We already had the airline tickets and she deserved going.
My thought about all this was: Do they take high Level gymnasts(like Olympians) to their meets with a different coach?I know our kids are not Olympians but they deserve better than that especially since we are paying for it.
We left the gym after Nationals.There were alot of different reasons why we left.
She is happy at the current gym were all the kids get the same attention.
 

JessMom

Member
Proud Parent
Mar 6, 2009
479
devastated

Jess was just heartbroken and sobbing. 2 additional coaches were also let go.
This was the hardest and smartest thing I have ever done. The next few weeks at the gym are going to have way to much stress and drama - and I want her to remember the gym as the happy place she loved.

She sat and cried for over an hour in my arms.

Now she's feeling better. I spoke to the new gym and they are going to let her compete USAIGC and USAG . So she can continue to work on her silver skills while trying to get the USAG compulsorys out of the way. She's looking forward to going tomorrow and picking any one thing she wants from their "store" and getting sized for grips.

Thank you all so much for your support. I can not tell you how much it helped to have people that "get it" for feed back.
 

emorymom

Active Member
Proud Parent
Oct 10, 2008
1,155
They found out some girls tried / looked at another gym and they were cornered . . yes, they cornered 12 year old girls and wanted to know if they were staying or going and told them how disloyal, dishonest they were etc etc

OMG did they consult the 12 year old girls or their parents when making the decision to let the coach go right before nationals? NO then they have no reason to complain.

I'm shocked. If there was a reason not to wait the three weeks ... they should probably pony it up.
 
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momofagymmie

Guest
This is horrible! How odd to do that and to say you don't need a coach??? I'd leave that gym immediately. Wouldn't your registration for nationals still be valid? You'd just need to have the new gym change her gym affiliation. What a shame and such a horrible way to end the year. So sorry for you and your dd.
 

TnTTaxi

Member
Jan 18, 2009
141
WOW, that is awful. I really hate to sound mean but someones head is screwed on crooked. Kids do not do well with crazy changes like that right before Nationals?? I really don't have any words of wisdom, just some of support and((((((HUGS))))))). I really hope you guys can get through it. Good Luck
 
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