Parents Need prayers for DD

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My DD is a level 5. She has her second competition of the season this weekend. She had such a bad night at practice last night and came home crying and even apparently cried at practice which she has never done in her 3 years of being on team. She fell on her bar routine twice, she fell on her cartwheel on beam and then didn't do her BHSs on flooor, just stopped at the round off. The coach had her do her floor routine again, but she still stopped at the round off. She says she's not afraid, but maybe she thinks her ankle hurts when she does BHSs. It doesn't hurt her any other time, and she is not one to make up injuries, so I don't know what is going on. She was quite disappointed with her last competiton, because she had fallen on her squat on and her cartwheel. She still got decent scores over all, especially for her first meet, but she was not happy with herself. She set a goal for herself to get at least a 36AA at the meet this weekend, and I am wondering if she just put too much pressure on herself.

She has practice again tonight and then she competes on Saturday. There is always the possibility that if she doesn't do the BHSs in practice tonight, they won't let her compete. Please pray for her if you are a praying person and any advice is gladly accepted, as well. I am just feeling so bad for her and I know that this is a place where people will understand.
 
Sending the "have a good meet fairies" her way!! Just remind her to have fun. Maybe if she can take the pressure off of herself, she will be more confident.

It is hard to have scoring goals. Better to have specific goals (stuck cartwheel, fewer bobble on beam than last time...). Hope all goes well at tonight's practice!
 
Aww, poor baby! My daughter has her first level 5 meet this weekend. (different meet, we will not be at the one you and the rest of the state are going to!:p)

My daughter had a similar experience last year right before her second L4 meet...a meet that requires a 9 hour drive and a 2 day hotel stay!:eek: She had a horrible practice and came out of there sobbing. It really put a damper on the anticipation of the meet, and we were really worried about her but she ended up doing great.

My daughter is struggling right now at the gym. She is, I think, growing, and all kinds of things are just "off". She is having BHS issues also and hurt her ankle last week.

Anyway...the point of all my rambling is, I do understand and I know it is no fun for them to be upset right before a meet. I will send thoughts and prayers that she gets it together and is able to do a great job. A 36 AA is a lofty goal for early in the season L5 though!:) Maybe a goal of sticking the cartwheel, the bars, the BHS would be better. My DD is expecting to score like she did last year in L4 and that is NOT going to be the case, so I am going to do some goal-setting with her before the meet too.

Good luck to her this weekend. We'll be thinking of y'all!
 
I'm sending all the good luck fairies to you too!!! She needs to relax and just have fun with it. Focus on goals that SHE is in control of, as the other posters have mentioned. Score goals are bound to lead to disappointment. You can never tell whether it's going to be a tough scoring meet, or an easy meet. As much as this is supposed to be objective, there is a lot of subjectivity in this sport!! Have fun and good luck!
 
I'll be praying for her to relax, have fun and let the rest come. Is she feeling well? My son was home this week with a fever and cold and alot is going around the school I work in too ( I myself feel under the weather today with a sinus thing). As for the goal of 36AA I would encourage her to go with improving on one apparatus at a time and on meet at a time. That is what we do with our DD. She sets a goal that she wants to obtain at states at the end of the season as well as ones for each individual meet she does. It keeps it fun and not too much pressure :) Will be thinking of your DD too as my DD has a meet on Saturday which also happens to be her birthday LOL.
 
Sounds like she is feeling way too much pressure. SHe needs to have reachable goals that have nothing to do with judges, scores, medal, placements or anyone else.

Meets for us have become delightful since I started my girls making goals for each apparatus. Stuff like staying on beam, doing x skill for the first time, sticking a dismount etc. Wanting to get better scores is not tangible when she has no control over that at all.

We only have three meets a year and I wanted to make it fun for us all, this works. If we had lots of meets, like in the US, I really would not want any stress surrounding the meets,

Also maybe try to find a way to celebrate the meet, we do ice cream and we talk about it for weeks before. NO matter what the outcome we are straight out of the gym and into the good stuff. Everytiime she says, "ice cream is way better than anything else".

YOur DD needs help to refocus on things she can control and to not focus on things she really has no control over.
 
Sending prayers your way! I agree with everyone else, she needs to drop the idea of goals that are tied to scores. I think she's putting way too much pressure on herself. I like the idea of having goals related to improving certain skills on each event. That way she can concentrate on the positive things and not get down on herself if she doesn't get the scores she wants. Scores are so subjective anyway. Good luck to your dd! Meets should be fun!!
 
Been wondering how your DD was doing. I agree that it sounds like she is putting too much pressure on herself and it is taking it's toll. 36AA is a really big goal for first season of level 5. Even first year L5s that we know that are at a gym that works ONLY routines and level skills and really push for those high scores, haven't hit that yet and they finish their season with States soon. Judging is tougher and it is such a big jump from level 4. Sure some girls hit that 36+ the first year, but not most I think.

I prefer my DD to make goals that aren't to do with scores when it is at a meet. She does have a long term goal chart on her wall that she made and it is mostly skill related, but she does have "get an 8 on XXX" and a separate "get a 9 on XXX", but no date set, nothing more than she hopes to someday get those scores on each apparatus, not necessarily at one meet, just sometime in her level 5 seasons.

I definitely would sit down and talk to her and try to get her to see that she is being VERY hard on herself. It would help if her coaches could be on board, helped my daughter a ton (unless the coaches are the ones talking scores, placements, etc). She was just seeing bad stuff and not realizing all the good things at practices for awhile. Talked to HC and she watched her, talked to her and saw what I was talking about. Now she will talk to her after practice sometimes and point out great things she did, etc. It has helped a lot. Whenever she comes out of practice in a funk over something, I ask her what good things happened and don't let her dwell on the bad.

Hugs and sending her lots of positive thoughts for practice tonight and her meet this weekend.
 
Sending your daughter big hugs and positive vibes.

I know it probably won't make you feel any better, but there was a girl on my daughter's team that was a L5 last year and started balking her RO-BHSs on floor the week before states. The poor girl just had a total mind block and could not tumble backwards. The coaches didn't pressure her though, there was no talk of not competing, they just told her to go home and not think about it. By the time she competed she threw the pass just fine.

I agree with everyone else though, don't have her get in the habit of seeking a score. The judges are just non-compliant half the time and you end up with a disappointed kid.
 
Thank you for all the thoughts, advice and encouragment! You guys are awesome. I think I will talk with her aboout realistic goals and encourage her to calm down and just have fun. She is super serious about gymnastics, which I respect so much in her, but it appears to have gotten into an unhealthy area right now. I'll let you know how she does. Thank you!!
 
My dd (also level 5) left practice crying the night before her first meet. She knew that she was probably going to have to scratch on bars, she had developed a sudden fear of the vault, and she felt like she couldn't do anything. It was the first time I had seen her cry out of frustration at a practice.

And it wasn't a great meet. But, even though I couldn't see her where she was sitting, I could hear her cheering louder than anyone for her teammates who were competing on bars, and I have to tell you, that made me as proud as the mom whose DD won 1st AA.

It's only been 5 weeks since that first meet and now she has her whole bar routine and has gotten over her fear issues of the vault. She placed AA in her 2nd meet, and I know she will do even better in her next one!

So, I guess the best you can do right now is try to give your DD a little perspective. If she doesn't do as well as she would like this time around, there will always be more meets. If she doesn't have the best routine on her team, she can still be the best sport on her team. And make sure she knows how proud you are of all of the hard work she's put in so far.

I'm probably not telling you anything you don't know, but I did feel like I should chime in since 5 weeks ago I was the mom posting on Chalk Bucket saying "My DD has a meet this weekend and left practice crying last night!" It's nice to have gotten through it (this time... I'm sure there will be more) but I do think that it was a good learning experience for my DD (and me). She finished off the level 4 season as "leader of the pack" and I think it's important for her to know it won't always just automatically be that way.

Best of luck this weekend!!!:D
 
Update on DD

Well, she did well enough at practice that she got to go to the meet. Floor was first, which I thought was just as well, so she could get past that BHS fear. She did a good routine, I thought, and finished with double backhandspring. I was so happy she got through it and did the BHSs! She got a 8.150, which I thought was low, but scoring seeming to be very tough. Then to vault, usually her strongest event. She got a 8.000. Again, I was surprised by how low it was, but I am not good at judging so perhaps something was off that I didn't see. On bars warm up, she did her squat-on every time, no problem. I was so excited for her. Then it's her turn to compete and she falls on the squat on. This time instead of doing another squat on like she did at the last competition, she does a climb on. Does that cause greater deduction? She got a 7.250. At her last comp, she fell on the squat on and still got like a 8.1. Anyway, on to beam, usually her least favorite and lowest scoring. During warm-up, she nailed the cartwheel beautifully every time. Then she competes, and you guessed it, she falls on her cartwheel. But she kept her composure, finished the routine and we were both surprised by her score of 8.525. She ended up with an AA of 31.925. Not exactly her goal, but I was just glad she got through it.

I have attempted to post a link to her video below. Hope it works! Thanks for all the encouragment!

My Montage 11/20/10 at One True Media - share slideshows, slide shows, Facebook slideshows, free video sharing, video montages.
 

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