Others moved up before my daughter and team mates

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Jumeriah

Proud Parent
I recently posted a thread here however it has disappeared so am re-posting.

Background:- My daughter is 10yrs old turning 11 this year. She is currently in Level 3 and has been in that level for 3 years. She has been training at 17hrs a week for 1.5yrs. She competed in her first regional comp this year and is off to state in October. Another member of the team who is better then my daughter has been in level 3 for 4yrs, and only competed in 3 level 3 comps.

Recently (beginnig of this year) 3 new girls were brought up from development squads. They were training 2 x a week and are aged 8&9. Since these girls moved to the team there has been alot of *****ing and nastiness amongst the girls. Mostly from the 2 of the new ones. Parents have been complaining to the owner who said he had sorted the issue.

At the end of last term 3 the 3 new girls received an email from the owner saying their girls have been working extremely hard and they are being moved upto level 4. Both my daughter and the other child were so upset and disappointed as they were told last comp they will be moving to level 4. My daughter and the other girl have been learning the same skills and want to move up, however these girls who don't have half the skills mine and another child have have been put up above our children.

I asked to speak to the owner about it all, and he told me its all to do with age and skill, and that he moved them up to level 4 to be with the other 8&9yr olds. I confronted him by saying that my daughter and in particular the other girl who is better then my duaghter should of gone up first as they have alot more of the skills achieved then the ones who were moved up.I said well why can't you move my daughter and the other girl up to level 5 to be with the older girls and push to learn more skills. They told me some of the skills she needs to be able to move up, yet the other girls who were moved up don't even have the skills to move up, nore some of the skills they need for level 3. our girls aren't allowed to use chiken grips or grips and these girls have been told to get them . It's all confusing and very upsetting for my daughter and the other girl who has worked their arse off.

He's sort of not telling us the same story (me and the other mum) and we don't know where it has left our girls. They have a comp coming up in October and i'm wondering if after that comp, i should ask him for a timeline on my child development and where he see's her going? I am paying a hell of a lot of money to this gym for her as she loves it, but if he isn't going to move her forward i don't know what i should do????

It's apparently the best gym in the Sutherland Shire, but if he isn't going to move her along, is it best to move to another gym?

What would you do?
 
I would check out another gym.
It certainly doesn't sound like it's a good gym for your child. From what you describe I would not be happy at all.
That's an awful lot of hours for level 3...

I would think of she hadn't been moved up after 3 years especially with the new levels etc. then it's not going to happen. Try another gym or another gym sport.
 
I'm not sure that moving your daughter up to the level 5s would be a good course of action. Level move ups should be based on ability and meeting of skill prerequisites, not age. (That goes for your daughter and all the others.)

If it didn't worry your daughter and she was happy to continue in the same level, then there would be no issue, however it is worrying/annoying her, so it is time to take some action. I would wait until after the comp though. Let her do that first, and then investigate other gyms.
 
I remember your previous thread. I said then that there's no way I'd be paying for 17 hours a week in level 3. That's even more true if she's doing 3 again. Just no way. Waste of money.

I'd be looking at other gyms. The "best gym" is not the same thing as "the best gym for your daughter".

I wouldn't be pushing for level 5 though either. My DD jumped from 3-5 this year and it was HARD. So many struggles and tears. She ended up doing ok in the end, but I spent a good portion of the year stressing and wishing she was doing 4.
 
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We have just made the heartbreaking decision to pull our daughter out of our current gym for coaching,safety and similar issues to yours. Even though it was hard we had to do what's best for her. We just couldn't leave her there any longer. So I know sort of how you feel but if you have the option I'd try another gym. Hang in there.
 
gymnastruby that is exactly what the other mum and i are saying.. It cost me a fortune per term ($1000 plus holiday programs) and she hasn't moved anywhere. I do understand if they aren't ready they aren't ready, but she has the skills so i just don't get it. The other mums daughter is better then my child and she defiantly should of been moved up first out of any of the group including my daughter.

COz- Can you explain the new levels and how it affects my daughter?

After the comp i will get her assessed by another gym. The problem with this owner is he tells you one thing, yet does the opposite. he told me that the level 3 and 4's train the same skills, yet my daughters level is not doing the same skills as the 4's so thats crap
 
The new levels are almost a "step down" from the old program. So new level 3 is pretty equivalent to old level 2, new 4 to old 3, new 5 to old 4 etc etc. this is why my dd jumped from 3-5. She was ready for old 4 after old 3. It was still a huge step though. Especially on bars. Even our old 3's who were in no way ready for old 4, went to new 4, (was that clear as mud????)

I just have no idea why they would keep her in 3 for so long. There seriously has to be a reason?? Any chance you have your mum goggles on? What have her scores been like in the past? What skills does she have and are they clean?
 
I'm new to the whole gym scene so don't understand it a whole lot. Mum goggles? as in what way?
Does age matter with the levels?

I have no clue re why she is still in level 3, she only started gym at the age of 8yrs so had to work hard to get where she is.

I don't remember the skill names, if you throw them at me i'll tell you where she is at.

The thing about the skills and being clean, doesn't make sense in her not going up when the girsl who just went up don't have the same skills and are def not clean.
 
By mum goggles I mean sometimes we think that everything our kids do is awesome, but unless you have a background in gymnastics you often can't see what coaches see.

maybe the other girls have good form on progression skills whereas your dd might not? There's usually good reasons why some move up and others don't.

I'm not sure what skills were required for 4 this year, I didn't watch many comps. From memory bars was a glide swing, pullover, back hip circle, squat on, tap swings, baby giant, under swing.

Floor, front handspring, round off, split jumps and leaps, and quit a bit of dance.

Not sure about beam.

Anyway, I still wouldn't be paying $1000 term for level 3. I'd be gym shopping for that reason alone.
 
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LOL@ mum goggles, I know what your saying here and I have spent a few hours in the gym with the owner and he has explained what is needed, but it's the same thing over and over again and no movement. He has told me she has the skills to progress and that after the comp (in may 2015) he was putting her and the other girl up to level 4, yet here we are still in level 3 with the 3 newbies who were only in level 3 for a short time be moved up. I even said the other girl should go up before my daughter so i'm not one of the mums who says oh my daughters the best. I even told the owner and coach i think the other girl should of been the first to go up.

Looking at the list below she can already do all of the level 3 skills, she got 3 firsts at the comp and a 2nd on beam at the regional comp.

The one thing she hasn't got yet is the front handspring, she can do the rest for the floor, she can do the bar skills also, beam she has some of the skills, so clearly could be training in level 4 to get the skills.

Level 4 has a comp coming up so i might go and watch....

The money is alot to pay but it's supposed to be a great gym.. however if they can't give me a timeline or guide to her progress i think i'll have her assessed at another gym.
 
I'm thinking that OzZee..........Do you know which one to look at? Can you PM me as the one she is at is the only one i was told to go to so have no clue whats the next best ones.
 
I completely understand why you would be frustrated and definitely agree you should look at some other gyms. Three years is a really long time to stay in one level. However I did want to add that it will be easier for you and your daughter in the long run to just focus on her gymnastics and her progress, not what is happening with other gymnasts....that will just drive you crazy! The problem here is not that he moved these other girls up (possibly prematurely)....it is that the coach doesn't seem to be attentive to your daughter's progress and seems content to let her stay in level 3 forever. He should have a plan for her and if you can't get that out of him that's definitely a reason to look into other options, but what happens with the other girls isn't relevant.
 
Gymdilettante, i hear what your saying but it is relevant when he has told my daughter and the other girl they were moving up to level 4 after the comp in May, did nothing to move them, then all of a sudden three new girls come up from development, and then a few months later he moves them to level 4 and not the two that i believe should of gone up. it left my daughter and the other girl confused upset and disheartened. When i'm paying the money i'm paying it would be nice to have an explanation that is the same as the one he gave the other mother and then a few other mums. I fully understand some kids move up quicker then others and it has never bothered me at all. but this one i just can't get my head around and have no clue whats the go with my daughter.

After the state comp i am calling a meeting to find out what his plan is for her and where he see's her going. The thing is he tells you what you want to here and his actions don't match up with the words he told you.

The reason its frustrating and i'm considering other gyms is my daughter has told me the girls have been rubbing it in their faces that they moved up and these girls didn't.. there is alot of nastiness going on at the moment in the groups.... My concern is my daughters happiness and if she isn't happy and he's not going to progress her then another gym may be the solution ..
 
Hopefully (for your family) it is just a case of the owner holding your kids back in order to win states.... and hopefully the others have been moved up so they are out of the way so that the children being used to sandbag are getting maximum attention to ensure the win. I would definitely look around if they are not moved after states.
 
It sounds like you have a pretty good plan. Whatever you agree to though, I'd email to them for confirmation so you have it in writing, given your feeling that they say one thing and then do another.

I think there are two important things to hang on to during this:
  1. Trust is an essential part of gymnastics - your daughter has to trust her coach and you have to trust the gym; otherwise your daughter will either stay miserable or her safety could be compromised. If you can't build up trust with your current gym again, then I'd say it's time for a fresh start somewhere else
  2. Lots can change in three or four months in a gym, which can be hard to understand from the sidelines - things that look set in stone do get changed, sometimes for the better or worse, but then it can all change in a different direction a few months later
As gymnastruby said, there may be some valid reasons for these girls to move up even though they don't look like they have the skills when your daughter does. At our gym, the most hours you can do at Level 3 is 12 hours, and girls rarely spend more than one year in Level 3, even when they only do 6 hours a week. Level 4 though, can be a sticking point for some kids to get past, although that will probably be Level 5 now under the new ALP program.

All the best!
 

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