Parents Parental "rewards" for basic gymnastics skills?

[Deleted member 18037]

Conversations wander and eventually wane. And lots of times good points come up.

No skill rewards here. Perhaps some ice cream for hard work.

 

[John]

@SophiaPD My DD is 11 Level 8. She is not the best at practice. She gets her work done but doing X number of routines is not her favorite thing. But on competition day she has the ability to "turn it on". I am not sure what she does different or if she has internal conversations with herself. I just wanted to tell you to keep your head up you are only trying to be a good parent.

 

[MuggleMom]

I've only ever offered up rewards for conditioning type stuff--primarily her presses. She got a video game when she got to 5 and every now and again I tell her if she can do 10 at practice that day we can stop for an Icee. That Icee is a miracle worker she seems to hit it every time the offer is made lol. But I stay away from the same types of deals on meet related skills and results she has her own goals for that stuff and I just offer encouraging words.

 

[gymmom41]

To play a little devil's advocate... I used to completely agree that this is their sport and I should offer nothing external to motivate. So the 1st 2-3 years at lower levels we did nothing. But when they reach higher levels, and it takes longer to get a skill, we often offer a little bribe. I think of it more like a celebration? My DD also plays VB and has a very inconsistent serve. (just like everything in gymnastics So we decided the day she gets 5 serves in a row in- we will go get snowcones. Will it make her an awesome VB player- no- it just makes it more fun. Had a hardtime with the squat on- so we decided after she did a 100 good ones she got a little stuffed animal. She decided on it and it gave her a little courage and motivation that summer. Pretty sure we are going to do something to celebrate this meet season if she can go 4 for 4 at a meet. I figure I reward myself after a long week at work so sometimes it's nice to reward them for the hard work they do. But she knows we're rewarding/celebrating the work done- not a score.

 

[Taxidriver]

I don’t offer rewards for skills or staying focused that is totally up to her however we will sometimes stop for a treat on the way home to celebrate either getting a new skill that’s taken her a long time or just when I think she needs a bit of a pick me up and to acknowledge all the hard work she puts in as gymnastics can be a very demanding sport and at times seems like there are no rewards as the skills get harder they take longer to learn.

 

[Dahlia]

I don’t offer rewards for skills or staying focused that is totally up to her however we will sometimes stop for a treat on the way home to celebrate either getting a new skill that’s taken her a long time or just when I think she needs a bit of a pick me up and to acknowledge all the hard work she puts in as gymnastics can be a very demanding sport and at times seems like there are no rewards as the skills get harder they take longer to learn.

I'm similar. No incentives. But when she gets a new skill and is proud of it we may go "celebrate" with ice cream or dinner at her favorite restaurant. It's the same type of things we do for my son when his team wins a tournament or he hits a triple, we might go have a little celebration. At the same time, if it's a busy weekend or night we might now always get a "celebration" in and they are ok with that and do not expect it. I think there is a big difference between celebrating and recognizing accomplishments and bribing with incentives.

 

[mommyof1]

Yesterday my daughter asked, during a water break at practice, if I would buy her a donut if she improved her kips. (Still muscled up.) Sure?
She tends to do things like this when she is very motivated about a skill. She wants to add external motivation to her internal motivation.

Mine sometimes requests a particular "celebration" for a new skill she is about to get. I think it is really a scheme to get doughnuts and ice cream, not a way to add external motivation.

 

[gymmom10]

Yes, maybe that’s the way to think of it... we have at times celebrated meets or events when she is pleased with herself. My daughter did ask for a leo years ago when she was working towards her giants. She wanted those giants more than anything else in the world and certainly didn’t need a leo to motivate her. But it was symbolic of what she achieved and she wore it proudly.

 

[duyetanh]

HAHAHA.

Omg! So did I!!!!
And I was thinking about how I rewarded myself with wine and crocs if I actually got through an entire meet without throwing up. Word.

 

[sce]

Had a hardtime with the squat on- so we decided after she did a 100 good ones she got a little stuffed animal. She decided on it and it gave her a little courage and motivation that summer.

I don't have the attention span for that. How did you guys keep track?

For my kids, the reward for getting something they struggled with was the skill itself. I celebrated with them (cheers, hugs etc.) because I was happy for them and proud of their hard work. No other rewards offered or given.

 

[gymmom41]

LOL. She had a wadded up piece of paper in her gym bag and made tally marks. I of course didn't see them all but it made her feel like she was making progress.

 

[reluctant]

My two girls, ages barely 7 and 11.5, have started Xcel Bronze and have been sloppy about staying on the beam. They are capable of doing staying on the beam during their fairly simple routine if they concentrate, but neither of them is solidly paying attention to balance.

I am considering having them work together toward a reward -- five practices each falling off the beam no more than once and you can get a toy/fro-yo/app or something similar. If it were a skill where I thought they had physical limitations and were trying, I wouldn't do it -- but for something like staying focused enough to not fall of the beam as much -- what do you think of offering an external reward?

The reason I don't like external rewards for gymnastics is because then she's doing it for you not for herself. If she's not doing it for herself, get out of the gym. It is way too expensive and time consuming to be involved with if you are not in it for its own rewards. The minute my kid asks for a treat for doing a skill is the day I tell them to think about cleaning out their locker. I'll take that $10,000 a year and spend it another way.

 

[3rd_time_around]

You could do like a report card-type thing. Have skills they are working on or would like to get, and when they do them, they can put a star sticker on the square. When the card spaces are filled up, have a celebration for all their hard work. This way, it's rewarding the effort and not the outcome. Or you can do beads on a string or marbles in a jar, etc. I'm not against rewards, I even rewarded my dd with a pedicure for her and a friend the first time she earned all 9s at a meet. It helped her focus on her performance, because before that she was just going through the motions. When she had the goal, she became more focused and determined. It took her two seasons, but when she finally accomplished it, she was pumped and her and her friend had a great time celebrating at the nail salon.

 

[Pirouette]

DD15 runs cross country in addition to gymnastics. She asked me if I would reward her any time she got a PR with a visit to Tropical Smoothie. She is still waiting to earn that reward this season . . . meet tomorrow morning at her favorite course . . . positive vibes welcomed . . .

I think it's different because she's older, she asked for the incentive, and she herself is the one who cares about the PR, not me.