Parents Sour grapes/navigating jealousy

[ProudDad]

I am just catching up on this thread and find it fascinating that there are such intense feelings about whether or not a child wears a medal that they won.

Agree, I had never even thought about it before - outside of making sure my DD understands the importance of good sportsmanship, I never thought it was my place to say anything about it... I didn't compete, they aren't my medals - If a kid who has struggled with an event finally breaks through and medals wants to wear the thing 24/7 for the next week, so be it... if another is sick of all the clinking a foot away from their ears and takes em off... ok. As long as they demonstrate good sportsmanship, win or lose, that's all that matters to me.

I will say, at our recent state meet there was one girl who was so sour about being called up for the later places (she got called up at least 3, if not more times, but all through like 6-10 place). I don't know the whole story so I try not to judge, maybe she had a really bad meet or a bad fall or has really intense parents, but she was obviously so displeased about not being higher up. Her coach was trying to joke with her, get her to smile, but she just had this nasty face and half-salute. All I could think of was how much my DD (who did end up with one event medal for 8th place) and her little teammate who ended up with nothing would have loved to trade places with her and were all smiles just from being there and enjoying the day. Her attitude up there was really embarrassing, especially for an 8 year old.

Speaking from seeing a teammate of my DD who did not achieve a personal goal and just had a a really hard meet about a month ago, every kid is different - I know that this one in particular is wonderful and would never want to detract from the accomplishments of others. She had overcome a mental block and had a great practice, but when it counted, fell. She had a sour face when getting called up, but it was because the top 6 medaled, but they called up EVERY place which went to 19, which I could understand her feeling as rubbing salt in a very fresh and raw wound. The whole thing was very emotionally challenging for her at a personal level - and I imagine she would have had the same look even if she had been in the top 6 because of her not meeting her goal... not sour grapes or envy of another girl. Would it have been better to put on a big smile and look the part, sure, but sometimes it's just too much for a tween girl to handle. (Father of 4 daughters... I have seen my own kids lose it because their mashed potatoes reminded them of some boy who talked to some other girl that day - so I may be biased )

 

[Texasmomof3]

What exactly are these medals made of anyway?

hah

I'm not up on my metal alloys, but it was a very thin, aluminum-like metal, shaped like a gymnast, connected to a larger circle by just one foot. The interior gymnasts broke off at the foot, leaving her with two hollow circles and a separate gymnast with a jagged edged foot. Like I said, they appeared to have already been -played with a bit and when she tried to straighten it back out, it popped off in her hand. And my daughter, not bring the brightest bulb, proceeded to do it again.