Parents Subconscious sabotage before testing?

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CuriousCate

Proud Parent
I was wondering what you all think about this... my older DD is 9 and training level 7 for the second time. The first time was exactly a year ago; she got all her skills on time for testing and then "lost" the giant the week of testing. She went back and forth with the skill and ultimately competed level 6. Now a full year later, a gym switch, a succusseful season at Level 5 and 6 and she is again training level 7. She again had every skill, including the giant, until last night's practice. She could not get her vault timer even once. She has already competed this on L6 (Yurchenko timer) reasonably well (8.9-9.15 range) given the crazy scoring and has never had trouble. Until last night. And guess what? Testing for L7 is tonight.

Do you think this is a common age to just freak out before testing? Or is she subconsciously sabotaging herself because something inside her is telling her that L7 is out of her reach? The timing seems too close to just be a coincidence... She will literally do the skills beautifully and consistently all the way up until the week of testing. I'd expect her to feel frustrated but she does not seem to to the extent I know that I would be if I really wanted something....which makes me question if this is her stopping point, you know? Like maybe subconsciously she just doesn't want to move up?

Anyone with a similar experience? TIA!
 
I don’t have experience with this but I also don’t understand why coaches who work with girls day in and day out need specific testing days to decide level placement. Seems like it should be more holistic than that and is extra pressure for no reason.
I agree. Except maybe they want to see how she performs under pressure. You have so much time to slow down and let her enjoy the ride- she’s young!
 
I can only speak based off of our experiences, but even if a child can physically do the skills, that is not the same as being mentally ready. It sounds like your daughter was 8 years old last summer testing for level 7? I know there are kids who can do it, but that is, in my opinion, pretty young for level 7. My own daughter was also 8 last summer, and her gym was pushing her to go from 4 to 7. Physically she could do it, but it was so stressful for her. She didn't lose any of her skills, but she was just done by the end of the summer. Similar to your daughter, we moved to a new gym and more positive environment, and she did level 6 last season and was happy as could be. Similarly, this summer, she could possibly do either 7 or 8 assuming she keeps making vault progress, but the idea of 8 sort of freaks her out, so I doubt that is going to happen. I guess in conclusion, I kind of agree with the two previous posters about the "testing" being the sole determinant of what level she does. Her coaches should know what she is capable of doing after working with her every day. But I also think it is important to keep in mind, that these are YOUNG kids and it is a lot of pressure on them at a young age. I hate that the push seems to be getting the kids to higher and higher levels at young ages when this is a sport that demands so much of their little bodies and minds AND the idea is longevity (a marathon, not a sprint)!
 
I agree that it sounds nerves and too much pressure (self pressure?) . How important is the testing? Is it a one time thing or a regularly scheduled thing? It seems like the coaches know what she is capable of and know she can do it so I would be surprised if the results would affect her ultimate placement. FWIW, our gym is doing "testing" this week too. They do it every couple of months or so and rate the readiness of different required skills for that level on a scale of 1-5. The girls want to do well and are upset if they have a skill but just make a mistake during testing and get a lower score. But I think the coaches ultimately know where they are at and I would be really surprised if the results of the testing alone had any impact on what level they compete. I think it more of the case if someone is on the border between 2 levels then they can use the scores to objectively justify their actual placement if that makes sense.
 
Sorry to post a question and then disappear! Thank you for the replies! I also do not really understand the whole testing thing when you work with a kid that much and know their skills. Funny thing is that she can actually perform fairly well under pressure at meets but tends to freeze up during testing - she thinks waaaay too hard about it. But then it's like once she knows that she has "made it" (ie the level), she's good to go. But there is something about the evaluation that makes her doubt herself. And I cant tell if it is just nerves or if it is a subconscious feeling that level 7 is just too hard or stressful or something like that.

I'm trying to keep it positive but I am not gonna lie - it's getting hard. @LJL07, our kids definitely sound like they've had similar courses. Our old gym did level 4 and then did the 5/7 jump in one year, so had it gone their way, she'd also have gone from 4 to 7 in a year. I was grateful she got to do 6 instead but honestly don't want to go through another whole year of it if the same thing may happen again a year from now. Part of it is because I am not in love with this sport... it has taken me a while to recognize that about myself and I work pretty hard to keep it to myself and to let both my kids live out their dream. That was a lot easier to do when there was always excitement and forward progress...as that slows down (or stalls!) it is definitely harder to muster up the enthusiasm!

Thank you for letting me ask questions and vent openly. Tough things to say...
 
Did she have the testing yet? I wonder if you could talk to the coaches and explain all this to them? (Not the part about not being in love with the sport lol, but the rest of it..) They've seen her at meets last year and know she can do the timer. If they understand that it's move up anxiety maybe they'll be able to help. I am sure that she would do great at 7!
 
I agree. Except maybe they want to see how she performs under pressure. You have so much time to slow down and let her enjoy the ride- she’s young!
If she is competing and succeeding. She has dealt with the usual pressure
 
In their defense, they picked her up mid season in level 6 and she sort of came to them on a bit of an emotional roller coaster. So they don’t really know her very well yet. Personally, I feel like if she competed successfully enough for level 6, let her train for 7 at his point. If she is getting closer to crunch time and she is not consistent, then different story. I don’t know...and hence my lack of love!
 
Sorry to post a question and then disappear! Thank you for the replies! I also do not really understand the whole testing thing when you work with a kid that much and know their skills. Funny thing is that she can actually perform fairly well under pressure at meets but tends to freeze up during testing - she thinks waaaay too hard about it. But then it's like once she knows that she has "made it" (ie the level), she's good to go. But there is something about the evaluation that makes her doubt herself. And I cant tell if it is just nerves or if it is a subconscious feeling that level 7 is just too hard or stressful or something like that.

I'm trying to keep it positive but I am not gonna lie - it's getting hard. @LJL07, our kids definitely sound like they've had similar courses. Our old gym did level 4 and then did the 5/7 jump in one year, so had it gone their way, she'd also have gone from 4 to 7 in a year. I was grateful she got to do 6 instead but honestly don't want to go through another whole year of it if the same thing may happen again a year from now. Part of it is because I am not in love with this sport... it has taken me a while to recognize that about myself and I work pretty hard to keep it to myself and to let both my kids live out their dream. That was a lot easier to do when there was always excitement and forward progress...as that slows down (or stalls!) it is definitely harder to muster up the enthusiasm!

Thank you for letting me ask questions and vent openly. Tough things to say...
I don’t like it either. Don’t even get me started. I will qualify that by saying it’s a beautiful sport, and I love watching it. But our family’s experience has been nothing short of ridiculous and kind of miserable. I understand how you feel! I wouldn’t want to cycle through the same experience either. Do you think part of it is the level number for your daughter? By that I mean, my daughter for all practical purposes did a level 7 routine on bars and beam but just seemed more comfortable with the idea of 6. One thing I keep telling myself is that if my kids’ goal is really to go to level 10 and possibly do some form of college gym, then they both have many more years left. I don’t see the point in pushing a 9 year old up to level 8 or 9 unless the goal is elite. I know your daughter isn’t trying to do 8 or 9, but I am reminding myself that slow and steady is best for our situation. Hard to keep that in mind with all of the craziness on social media! And yes, the forward progress and momentum does slow down after or around level 7! And it might be more of an adjustment when that sets in for the kids who are used to acquiring skills quickly.
 

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