WAG Taking an "F" for middle school PE

[sce]

Ok....this really irritates me, mainly because of how it was handled. If they told you fine, but an F will be forthcoming, then its your call. They made their own call based on your decision, and you weren't notified. For me this is a problem.

I agree with this. It was not made clear ahead of time for you/your daughter t decide is she was willing to take an F. The school needs to find a way to right this situation.

 

[Daphne Banks]

Thank you all for your great replies so far! You have all suggested such great things to be concerned about-- honor societies, dances, student council, etc. I may check into a few of these though in most cases, sleep wins anyway. I'm not sure I've seen an item that would cause us to send her to PE. Please do keep them coming though! This is what I was hoping to learn from this community.

We are in California. I spoke again with the administration. Her options are 1) go to PE or 2) take the "F". There is no PE exemption, home study, etc. available in our district for middle school.

I also talked to my DD about the F (decided to put it all out there). She gets it and is okay with it. She gets all As in other classes, cares about grades immensely, but understands the situation here. Sadly, she ends practice at 8:30 PM, commutes 30 minutes, and needs 11 hours sleep minimum. Which makes it tricky to even get her there for second period! Sigh.

 

[bookworm]

To the OP, I'm kind of puzzled...is PE at the same time every day? And as a middle schooler, we exactly does she go when she decided she wasn't doing PE (if it's in the middle of a class day)? Our schools were great with letting mine out early etc but not showing up for a class during the day wouldn't fly.....missing just this one class seems to be a lot of hassle, schedule wise.

 

[NutterButter]

I think OP's DD has gym 1st period so she just gets to school late.

 

[profmom]

Just warning you that it will not get easier when she gets to high school. My beloved offspring are on the bus just before 7 AM. They have learned over the years to try to work ahead on non-gym days and they do try to catch up on sleep on weekends, but they have had to adjust. Continuing in public school is important to both of them because they have identities that go beyond gymnastics, and because their district is very strong academically and in the arts. My son, who's in ninth grade, is just about to start a big math project after napping for an hour. He set an alarm. I'd encourage you to take advantage of the opportunity that middle school/junior high provides to figure out the balancing act that will be necessary later.

 

[txgymfan]

It seems nearly impossible for any one to maintain 11 hours of continuous sleep, let alone an athlete.

 

[Daphne Banks]

Correct, she has PE first period four days a week. Yes, it is hard to get 11 hours sleep. She needs so much! Often she'll get less and be very hard to wake. On weekends she often sleeps 12.

My DD, like most gymnasts, is an efficient homework goddess. I'm not sure to there is anything gained by dealing with less sleep in training for HS.

 

[profmom]

I'm just telling you that for most public high schools, yours is not a sustainable model. If your daughter needs 11-12 hours of sleep a night, something's going to have to give.

 

[Daphne Banks]

I'm just telling you that for most public high schools, yours is not a sustainable model. If your daughter needs 11-12 hours of sleep a night, something's going to have to give.

Hopefully in three years for HS her sleep needs will decrease! In the meantime I don't want to give up on needed sleep, brain/body development in anticipation of that. Just want to get through a month staving off injury, illness, and exhaustion. I realize my DD has somewhat extreme sleep needs. Her little sister gets by on 9 no problem.

We take it year by year. Given her schedule this year, my DD is happy and healthy. Just the dang F has thrown our perfect situation for a small loop.

 

[wandrewsjr]

Thank you all for your great replies so far! You have all suggested such great things to be concerned about-- honor societies, dances, student council, etc. I may check into a few of these though in most cases, sleep wins anyway. I'm not sure I've seen an item that would cause us to send her to PE. Please do keep them coming though! This is what I was hoping to learn from this community.

We are in California. I spoke again with the administration. Her options are 1) go to PE or 2) take the "F". There is no PE exemption, home study, etc. available in our district for middle school.

I also talked to my DD about the F (decided to put it all out there). She gets it and is okay with it. She gets all As in other classes, cares about grades immensely, but understands the situation here. Sadly, she ends practice at 8:30 PM, commutes 30 minutes, and needs 11 hours sleep minimum. Which makes it tricky to even get her there for second period! Sigh.

Is at least good your school is allowing her to miss without recording her as truant. Not all schools in CA would even give you the level of cooperation you are receiving. She is 11 yr old 6th grader, right? Who knows if she'll still need the same amount of sleep in 3 years. Heck, who knows if she'll still be in the same sport. Glad you have found something that works for you and your family now.

 

[profmom]

Actually, I'm wondering if it might not be a bad thing to have a quick thyroid check, unless she has always needed a lot more sleep or she is entering puberty. I know gym is strenuous, but this seems unusual to me. I hope her school year goes well, and her gym year as well!

 

[mommyof1]

Is at least good your school is allowing her to miss without recording her as truant. Not all schools in CA would even give you the level of cooperation you are receiving.

I was wondering about this as well. Where we live (not CA), the truant officer would already be involved.

 

[rjb123]

Honestly the sleep thing doesn't surprise me at all. When my son was that age he slept ALL. THE. TIME. Puberty hit, growth, etc and the kid was always exhausted. It is pretty typical. Glad you found something that is working for you now. I agree- taking this sport year by year is the best way (at least for me!!) to cope/ plan.

 

[Texasmomof3]

Where I live in Texas, 10 excused absences still lands the parents in truancy court. I cannot imagine a whole semester of unexcused. Are they recording it as absences?

 

[Jard.the.gymnast]

Honestly the sleep thing doesn't surprise me at all. When my son was that age he slept ALL. THE. TIME. Puberty hit, growth, etc and the kid was always exhausted. It is pretty typical. Glad you found something that is working for you now. I agree- taking this sport year by year is the best way (at least for me!!) to cope/ plan.

When I was 11, I could not live through an entire day without a nap. I slept 8/9 hours a night plus an additional 2/3 hour nap. Still don't know why. I'm 14 now and I can function normal with 5/6 hours, although I usually sleep 7 to 9 hours a night ( depends on how late school starts)

 

[tucktwisttumble]

Unrelated to the initial question (as I am not in the USA - thus I cannot speak on your districts administration).. but...
Another poster mentioned it - have you examined any medical rational as to why she could be requiring so much sleep? I am speaking from personal experience- as I am not an MD, and not legally qualified to provide medical advice. As a highschool student i would sleep approximately 7 hours a night IN ADDITION to about a 3-4 hour nap afterschool before I had cheerleading practice (which often was between 7 and 10pm).
My mom was concerned that I legitimately could not function without the 3-4 hour nap each day which was totaling about 10-11 hours of sleep per 24 hour day. Turned out I was EXTREMELY low on my iron levels.
Something to ponder...

 

[kecks]

second the iron level thing. a too low iron level is a very common problem for female youth athletes.

 

[momstrong]

Actually, I'm wondering if it might not be a bad thing to have a quick thyroid check, unless she has always needed a lot more sleep or she is entering puberty. I know gym is strenuous, but this seems unusual to me. I hope her school year goes well, and her gym year as well!

YES! I just had the same thought - thyroid/hashimoto's etc. Which I have... a regular doctor may not do all the necessary tests to detect it though. there are several thyroid levels to check - particularly the thyroid peroxidase (TPO) should be below 9. Good luck!

 

[Daphne Banks]

Thank you everyone for your concerns! My DD has always slept a lot though-- even before she was a gymnast. I looked up iron deficiency and Hashimotos, but she has no other symptoms, so I'm not sure. When she is awake, DD is a high energy, high performing kid so I am skeptical that she has any issues. Other than needing a lot of sleep... She isn't the best at getting her needed calcium or protein, but we work hard at getting her protein she likes and give her a teen multi-vitamin as well as a calcium supplement.

Also, researching further, it seems 9-11 hours is normal for 6-13 year olds:
https://sleepfoundation.org/excessivesleepiness/content/how-much-sleep-do-babies-and-kids-need. Certainly, life would work better if she only needed 9. Maybe her 11 hours sleep seem surprising to others here because it is really hard to be a gymnast AND sleep 11 hours a night. Maybe the sport selects not only for strength, flexibility, stature, etc. but also low hour sleepers!

 

[GymmieC]

I agree with others about scheduling a sit down with admin and teachers. As a teacher, I need to add to find out your state regulations. Keep in mind, there are some administrators and teachers alike who simply like to be in control. If they think they can strong arm you they will. I would be very upset if they pulled that fast one with my daughter.