Parents Well, not sure if this feels horrible or good

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emorymom

Proud Parent
My kid just beat half the L3 team of her Dream Gym that was so horrible to her.

She had done preschool at this gym but did L2 team at the Y because she was only offered the 1-hour hotshots type class the year she was six. When she was 7 we went back when they offered her team.

Last March when she was 8, they told me she would never be an L3 at their gym. No matter what. No matter that she was willing to be demoted without complaint from L2 team (after transferring from the Y) to pre-team, and then not moved up but left another year on pre-team, and then was told she should switch to rec. When I said no, her dream is to compete for you, she is willing to stay on pre-team for another year ... here is the kicker.

Last March, in response to being told she was willing to do another year of pre-team to make team with them, they said she could do L2 team again for them but "it wouldn't go any farther than that." Not if she did extra hours while competing L2 again. Not if she was willing to do 2 years of L3. It just wasn't going to happen. They were lucky enough to be able to be selective.

:mad:

Instead of doing L2 team for you in 2012-13 and being thrown out, my kid is doing L3 team at the Y and just beat half your L3 team.
 
It's all relative. I'm glad you moved on and found a gymnastics outlet that works for your daughter, as very few gyms are the right fit for every child, and as you now realize not every gym is a good fit for an individual child.

The gym that you left has obviously a narrow criteria for team kids that those who seem well suited to the sport are not going to thrive in and enjoy their program. Consider it a good thing they held the position they did, for they may have saved you and your dd a bunch of angst for many years to come.
 
Wow, what an odd situation. Im glad you got out of there! I know my DD would have been devastated to watch her friends move up while she had no chance of mobility! I hope she's much happier where she is now! As for how it should "feel"..... I wouldn't base it on competition, just how your DD did and how much she enjoyed herself! :)
 
I assume you mean "not well suited." Yeah.

What I mean is there are a lot of kids who look very capable of being a team member at one program or another, and will enjoy gymnastics for a few years....and longer. I believe this gym has such a narrow view of the physical gifts a kid needs to be allow a spot on their team, that they "pass" on many kids that are welcome elsewhere, and indeed do reasonably well.

Those kids that they refuse a spot to will generally, in their opinion, fail to "catch on" to their program. If they were to take these kids in, they would expect them to fail and coach them accordingly, and that usually hurts the kids far more than being refused a team spot in the first place.

It just may be a real life example of "Be careful for what you wish."
 
I'm glad you found a gym that is a good fit for your daughter. In my opinion the old gym did you a favor, although rejection can sting, from an outside perspective many gyms do not take kids on their team for various reasons. It's better to be honest than to string you along for tuition $ at the lower levels.
 
What was their reasoning behind why they'd never let her be a L3? Did they even explain why to you? Was it a specific physical limitation, or form issues? It is true that there are gyms that have specific criteria for the girls they take on team - you can tell the ones that do this just by looking at their team at meets - if they are all look the same physically, are all equally flexible, all in one age group, etc. you can assume they only take a certain type of gymnast.
 
I'm glad your DD has found her niche and is doing well . As the other posters have said, it's probably better that the original gym was honest with you, rather than stringing you along.
I have 3 daughters, the 2 oldest are on team. The youngest was on preteam and it looked to me, after a year, that she wasn't really progressing . I asked the coach of the preteam if I she wasn't really suited for gymnastics. I was assured, no, she just needed some more time to mature. Fast forward 6 months ( and tuition $$ later) and I got a letter from the gym director that my youngest was being moved to preteam.
 
wow, that IS an awful story. If I were you, I think I'd feel terriffic!! To your daughter, way to go!! Great job. We have stories like this with my little daughter too. Some gyms are just meanies.
 
You know telling more of this story with my family only gets worse. So I'll try to keep it short.

To clarify, she didn't transfer over from her first competition team as a pre-teamer. They took her onto full team. They demoted her after a couple of months of working out with their L2s for not learning fast enough.

She is very tall, she tends towards tight shoulders and she isn't the most coordinated person in the room. Did I mention she outscored five of their ten ohso-highly-selective L3s on Saturday, who work out 50% more hours? She is also spot-on the most typical age for their L3 team.

Oh well, luckily her first team was willing to take her back. They're a very sane team. I wasn't super eager to move her off of there to begin with, but DD loves gym so much she wanted a more intense program.
 
I'm glad you are in a gym that works well for your dd and your family. Obviously the other gym is being highly selective in their girls. They are likely looking into the future, not the lower levels. Many gyms are like this. They are not as concerned about scores and performance in the lower levels, as they are working on higher skills for he upper levels. Unfortunately, when they overfocus on the future, they often miss out on some great girls because they just don't fit that mold at that particular moment. Like I said, sounds like she is in a great position now and that's what counts
 
Ok I'm a little confused here. Maybe I need to reread the thread. I got that your DD beat most of the L3 at her old gym that wouldn't let her on their L3... ever? Right? (BTW good job lil one!) Now I'm confused as to why the other gym wouldn't allow your DD on their L3 team. What were their reasons for that besides being "selective"? I can understand that if DD wasn't picking up skills fast enough to be moved back to L2, but why would she never be allowed on their L3 team?
 
Was told: It just wasn't going to happen. Not if she worked more hours. Not if she was willing to do two years of L3 after another year of L2. She wasn't good enough. Her shoulders are tight. They have the luxury of being selective. So they were willing to let her back on L2 to compete for 2012-13 and then they just didn't see it going any farther than that.
 
I think it's for the best you switched back. You can't have her at a place where the coaches don't believe in her- what's that going to do to her self-image?
 
Re-reading my thread, they moved my littlest back to rec classes...

I don't know why some gyms do what they do. But in the long run, if the coaches don't believe your DD is capable, then she is not going to be coached to her full ability, so she's better off somewhere else.

I'm glad they were wrong , though! It does make you feel like going "na na na boo boo! Stick your head in doo doo!"
 
I think your DD is at a good gym for her, is happy, and the fact that she beat some of the girls from the other gym is just icing on the cake. :p (sticking tongue out at old gym there). Not every gym works for every kid. Keeping them happy and in gym for as long as possible should be the goal for us as gym parents. My advice would be...try not to look back or think about the old gym and what they are doing too much. You've moved on and it's clearly a good fit for your DD.
 

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