WAG Advice on Twins?

[mariposa]

After your update, I think you need to stand your ground and move up girl who is ready and keep twin with the level 3s. We have girls of all ages at level 3 and level 4 and it's part of gym to learn to get along with kids of all ages, not just same age, much like in life. Many twins are at different levels in gyms all across the country. We have had several sets of siblings where younger one moved up quicker and it all worked out. I think if you give in now, you'll always be giving in every move up time. Won't do either twin any good.

Good luck!

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

With the practices being at the same time.... I would separate them. It's likely what I would do anyways, but that really decides it for me as there is no need at all to consider "convenience". The parent needs to understand that you want both girls to have a chance to be the most successful they can be, and right now that is NOT in the L4 group for Kate.
Good luck!! Sometimes the hardest part of this job is making those difficult decisions that you know are in the best interest of the kid but the parent will dislike....
You should do what is best for Kate and if the outcome is that mom gets huffy and pulls Kate (and perhaps even Emma) out....then so be it. As a coach I don't respond well to parents trying to dictate how I place kids and I do not take kindly to parents trying to hold one "desired" kids presence over me in order to have a less talented sibling in groups they don't belong (yes, I have had this happen.)

 

[2G1B]

As a mom of 3 gymnasts, 2 of them twins, this mom needs to suck.it.up. I have seen this before with twins and it blows my mind. I gave even seen it with siblings. Either holding one back or pushing one ahead so that they have the same schedule or so that feelings aren't hurt. Both are bad reasons. If you have more than 1 kid they are going to gave different schedules and strengths. She should count herself lucky that she made it 12 years before dealing with it. I'm 3 years into this sort if thing and my oldest us 10!

 

[gymdog]

Let Kate stay 2.5 hours longer on Saturday then. She is 12. I think that is significant. The other parents don't have 12 year olds.

 

[emorymom]

I agree with gymdog. At twelve, if she is ambitious about moving forward in gymnastics, let her do more hours.

 

[MaryA]

As a mom of 3 gymnasts, 2 of them twins, this mom needs to suck.it.up.

You and I can plan a mother-of-twins intervention!

 

[Gymmonkeymomma]

Mom of twins here.... As long as these girls are not Siamese twins, move up. The one who is ready!

 

[Kcanflip]

Move her up. It's called being an individual. And lifes not always fair just because you are the same age. Mom doesn't quite get this! I can say this as I am a triplet (all girls) and have twins (boy/girl) myself. I love my sisters but despised being 'grouped' as one growing up.

 

[htimcj]

We have a set of twins at DD gym and they both compete different levels. Not a big deal. Easier actually since they aren't competing against each other. I would move them up but I am a parent not a coach

 

[rgmom]

I also have 13 Year old twins. They have always been about the same skill wise, and have always competed the same level. They have flip flopped over the years in winning. Both have had ups and downs, but have essentially remained about even. One is a bit injured at the moment with a sore back and elbows. For the first time, the healthier twin is pulling far ahead of her sister. I would never hold either one back to keep them even. That's ridiculous. Even though they are identical twins, they are not the same person.

 

[cbifoja]

We had a set of siblings that the mother insisted on keeping the girls at the same level. I believe they started at the same time (before my DD was on team so I could be wrong) and despite a 2 year age difference, Mom always demanded they be together.

Older sister was a truly beautiful gymnast. Gorgeous lines, mature for her age, progressed quickly but was held back to stay on level with her sister. She ended up getting discouraged at old L6 but carried on. She started training for optionals with the plan of "skipping" L6 and going straight to L7.

Younger sister was a cute girl who had many of the same skills as big sis but they never looked quite as good. She was also pushed a little to keep up with big sis and developed some freaky crazies during her L6 year. During her L6 year, the coach had to come and stand on the floor while she did her final tumbling pass (scared of the back tuck). She started training for optionals with the plan of competing L6. Mom threw a royal fit but HC held firm that lil sis was NOT going to L7.

Mom said older sis had to compete L6. HC said no. Older Sis then developed back problems and quit before competing in a single optional meet. Little sis did a year a L6, developed an eating disorder, crashed and burned at state and left the sport.

So I guess mom "won".....both girls are still at the same level. :-(

 

[cbifoja]

Now compare that to the twins we have. Mom is very detached from levels. She wants both girls to enjoy their sport and do their best. Twin A has moved steadily, one level per year. She will be an L8 this season. Twin B struggles some. She did a stint in Xcel, started her optionals at L6, and will either have a rough L7 year or be a specialist. But she is moving on her own terms, not being forced into a level by her mother.

Both girls have been in the sport for years. They are happy, always smiling and laughing. They enjoy the sport and mom enjoys watching them. But mom doesn't try to dictate what level either girls will compete.

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

I just truly don't understand the parents who insist on trying to dictate placement of their children. As a parent, I just wouldn't have the brass ones to even ASK..! I see it in dance too. Just don't get it.....

 

[Aero]

We had a set of siblings that the mother insisted on keeping the girls at the same level. I believe they started at the same time (before my DD was on team so I could be wrong) and despite a 2 year age difference, Mom always demanded they be together.

Older sister was a truly beautiful gymnast. Gorgeous lines, mature for her age, progressed quickly but was held back to stay on level with her sister. She ended up getting discouraged at old L6 but carried on. She started training for optionals with the plan of "skipping" L6 and going straight to L7.

Younger sister was a cute girl who had many of the same skills as big sis but they never looked quite as good. She was also pushed a little to keep up with big sis and developed some freaky crazies during her L6 year. During her L6 year, the coach had to come and stand on the floor while she did her final tumbling pass (scared of the back tuck). She started training for optionals with the plan of competing L6. Mom threw a royal fit but HC held firm that lil sis was NOT going to L7.

Mom said older sis had to compete L6. HC said no. Older Sis then developed back problems and quit before competing in a single optional meet. Little sis did a year a L6, developed an eating disorder, crashed and burned at state and left the sport.

So I guess mom "won".....both girls are still at the same level. :-(

This mom is the very definition of "idiot." This is a very sad story.

 

[NoDramaMama]

I have twins, too, but they are G/B, so I don't have many of the same issues as parents with same gender twins. Both of them are competitive with each other, in spite of my diligence in not comparing them, etc. If I were in your situation, I would follow your gut and allow the one twin to move to L4. I would give the other twin the option of practicing the additional 2.5 hours on Saturday with the L4's because she is 12 YO. We have girls that have trained with L3 and L4, but ended up not getting their skills and competing down a level. They still stay with their training group and when they practice routines, each level does there own. It really is a non issue.