I am really stuck... I know every gymnast has that phase of wanting to quit and I have had a couple...This time it just feels very real though, and I don't know where to go. I was very irritated last night and didn't know why, my mom sat me down and said we were going to write down my worries and I just started to cry..
I have been off gym for 5 weeks due to 2 bulging discs and a hairline fracture in my back, plus I kneed myself in the nose doing and double front- which caused a lot of damage and led to nose surgery, which was REALLY painful and uncomfortable (Surgery was just 4 days ago).
I switched gyms in August 2011, There are some cruel thoughts from the coaches. We aren't allowed to eat/drink unhealthy because they do not want their gymnasts to be fat and prancing around in leotards, they are recommending dropping our electives at school to train earlier, they are strictly focusing on winning... Most of the girls on our team have some sort of injury that are kinda being ignored, and the conditioning we do is CRAZY: It is sooo painful! I dont really bond with anyone on my team... Not like at my old gym at least.. I miss having friends, I feel like I don't have a social life..
I feel like gymnastics isn't me.. I feel like I would much rather have fun, and enjoy myself then be an intense athlete.. Me and my mom thought I should try track and field (I did it before gym and loved it) or swim team (which dosen't seem exciting).... I can't really think of another sport I want to do though, and I really do love gymnastics... I don't know who I am without gym, and I dont want to be anyone else..
BUT I am batteling a lot of fear also... Im not progressing that much because of fear. I read a story on Avery Downing, and how she was perfectly fine and then one fall on bars and now she is paralyzed.. It really scared me... I can NOT get it off my mind. I am scared to death now that will happen.
Also, I had competley made up my mind I was going to quit last night, and I felt GREAT about the idea... I was so excited to try new things. But today, I am sad and confused on that idea. I was at the store and I was thinking "What is the point in life?" As a gymnast, I have been structured, something to look forward too everyday, a goal I was chasing.. Without it, I cant even see the point in being alive. Its such a weird feeling...
I dont know to move on, but it might be time? I dont know if my body is giving me signs to quit, or if its ok... HELP!
Maybe its still the surgery meds that are making me all looney?
I have been off gym for 5 weeks due to 2 bulging discs and a hairline fracture in my back, plus I kneed myself in the nose doing and double front- which caused a lot of damage and led to nose surgery, which was REALLY painful and uncomfortable (Surgery was just 4 days ago).
I switched gyms in August 2011, There are some cruel thoughts from the coaches. We aren't allowed to eat/drink unhealthy because they do not want their gymnasts to be fat and prancing around in leotards, they are recommending dropping our electives at school to train earlier, they are strictly focusing on winning... Most of the girls on our team have some sort of injury that are kinda being ignored, and the conditioning we do is CRAZY: It is sooo painful! I dont really bond with anyone on my team... Not like at my old gym at least.. I miss having friends, I feel like I don't have a social life..
I feel like gymnastics isn't me.. I feel like I would much rather have fun, and enjoy myself then be an intense athlete.. Me and my mom thought I should try track and field (I did it before gym and loved it) or swim team (which dosen't seem exciting).... I can't really think of another sport I want to do though, and I really do love gymnastics... I don't know who I am without gym, and I dont want to be anyone else..
BUT I am batteling a lot of fear also... Im not progressing that much because of fear. I read a story on Avery Downing, and how she was perfectly fine and then one fall on bars and now she is paralyzed.. It really scared me... I can NOT get it off my mind. I am scared to death now that will happen.
Also, I had competley made up my mind I was going to quit last night, and I felt GREAT about the idea... I was so excited to try new things. But today, I am sad and confused on that idea. I was at the store and I was thinking "What is the point in life?" As a gymnast, I have been structured, something to look forward too everyday, a goal I was chasing.. Without it, I cant even see the point in being alive. Its such a weird feeling...
I dont know to move on, but it might be time? I dont know if my body is giving me signs to quit, or if its ok... HELP!
Maybe its still the surgery meds that are making me all looney?