Based on my (albeit limited) experience in our gym (we've only been in 1), and from what I've gathered from CB posts here and there, it seems that by and large, parents are seen by coaches as public enemy #1. Or at least the antagonist. Lip service is given to the coach-parent-gymnast triad with the coach and parent being the "base" of support, but where and how does this actually happen? It seems that we're bombarded with "bad gymnastics (or sports) parents" articles and blog posts (what not to do, what questions not to ask, etc.) and questions for coaches are not often welcome. In general, issues about coach-parent (or gym-parent) communication often come up in posts here in CB -- some gyms are good at this, many are awful, etc. How can this be improved??
Yes, there are truly awful sports parents who should be banned from all practices and competitions for all of eternity. I get it. I'd like to think, though, that these parents aren't the norm. Still, the reaction to this (i.e., above-mentioned blog posts about what not to do as a sports parent and coaches seeming to hate to talk to parents) seems to presume that most of us ARE like this. At my gym, at least, we really don't have any truly CGParents. We have parents who just are confused about why coaches seem to hate to talk to us. I'd like to believe that when we have questions, or speak up on behalf of our kid, or wish to provide insight about our kids' needs, we really just are honestly curious and are otherwise trying to be helpful. Am I living in a bubble? Are these kind of parents really that rare? The world of competitive gymnastics is such an unknown entity to most of us parents -- I, at least, had absolutely no clue what we were signing up for. I so wish coaches would help us learn what TO do as gym parents (beyond the same old adages of "tell your gymnasts you love to watch them nothing more than "have fun and work hard" or whatever). Also, frankly, I wish to better understand skills and how they work and what judges are looking for, etc. Why is that so awful? (yes, I know, b/c many parents have terrible motives when doing this, coaching starts to happen at home, etc.)
So, coaches or anyone else with insight: What questions from parents are appropriate? What questions aren't? What conversations are deemed helpful (and which ones aren't)? Can I ask a coach why Suzy got x score on beam without coming across as being crazy? Can't I just be asking out of innocent curiosity?
Again, I know -- many crazy parents have ruined it for us so now we're all suspect. I KNOW coaches have reason to see us as the enemy and run when they see us coming. I wish this could change though. (right -- pipe dream)
If you are in a gym that does this right -- where parents and coaches seem to have a great relationship and open communication happens without malice -- please share. I want to know what such a picture would look like.
Yes, there are truly awful sports parents who should be banned from all practices and competitions for all of eternity. I get it. I'd like to think, though, that these parents aren't the norm. Still, the reaction to this (i.e., above-mentioned blog posts about what not to do as a sports parent and coaches seeming to hate to talk to parents) seems to presume that most of us ARE like this. At my gym, at least, we really don't have any truly CGParents. We have parents who just are confused about why coaches seem to hate to talk to us. I'd like to believe that when we have questions, or speak up on behalf of our kid, or wish to provide insight about our kids' needs, we really just are honestly curious and are otherwise trying to be helpful. Am I living in a bubble? Are these kind of parents really that rare? The world of competitive gymnastics is such an unknown entity to most of us parents -- I, at least, had absolutely no clue what we were signing up for. I so wish coaches would help us learn what TO do as gym parents (beyond the same old adages of "tell your gymnasts you love to watch them nothing more than "have fun and work hard" or whatever). Also, frankly, I wish to better understand skills and how they work and what judges are looking for, etc. Why is that so awful? (yes, I know, b/c many parents have terrible motives when doing this, coaching starts to happen at home, etc.)
So, coaches or anyone else with insight: What questions from parents are appropriate? What questions aren't? What conversations are deemed helpful (and which ones aren't)? Can I ask a coach why Suzy got x score on beam without coming across as being crazy? Can't I just be asking out of innocent curiosity?
Again, I know -- many crazy parents have ruined it for us so now we're all suspect. I KNOW coaches have reason to see us as the enemy and run when they see us coming. I wish this could change though. (right -- pipe dream)
If you are in a gym that does this right -- where parents and coaches seem to have a great relationship and open communication happens without malice -- please share. I want to know what such a picture would look like.