Parents 6 year old Level 4 struggling

[soccergymmom]

My dd made the switch from Level 3 to Level 4 mid-season. She had trained pre-team for a year but needed some extra time to get some skills. Level 3 was great; first or second AA. Now that she is back to Level 4 she is struggling. (Our gym doesn't have a Level 3 team). I believe she has so much potential to be a great gymnast - there are moments watching her when I see it. But then her inconsistency frustrates me constantly. I know it has been hard for her, having to learn two routines. She was a really good Level 3. But now it seems she is always in last place and I feel so bad for her. Beam - she can't get the L4 dismount. Or hold the scale properly. Floor - she will only do round-off bhs on the mat and bonks her head a lot on the handstand to bridge kick over. Vault - first L4 meet it was a 5.4, she worked hard and the next two meets she scored 8.5's, but now she is piking into it again and scoring mid 7's. Bars - can't get mill circle. She hooks her leg and it kills her score. Strangely enough, when she drop it in L3 she still was scoring mid 8's. But not now - her highest score has been a 7.8.

I just don't know what to do as a parent. She loves gymnastics and does not want to quit the team. But I get so frustrated that it seems at times she isn't doing her best. She will be tight and beautiful one day in practice, and I'm like, where was that at the last meet? Now her state meet is next weekend and she will be lucky to medal at all. Where do we go from here? Is this normal for a young one like her? She is also very small and short. Strong for her size though. She trains TOPS and so does a lot of conditioning. She didn't turn 6 until the end of October. Do I just expect too much from her? Should I give her another year as a Level 4 (well I guess it will be 3) and see how it goes?

Thank you.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

oh, man. reality check. she's only 6. the first 4 sentences of that last paragraph are painful to read. maybe you better put her in soccer where everyone looks the same. runrunrunkickkickkickrunrunrunkickkickkickrunrunrunkickkickkick.

i'm certain parents here will talk you off the ledge. hurry up, guys & gals!

 

[soccergymmom]

*cringe* Yes, see this is what I needed to hear. Thank you. And lol it is my son that is in soccer.

 

[cbifoja]

I'll start....

For me, it isn't that she is only 6 or only L3. It seems that sometimes the younger/lower level kids are treated somewhat dismissively. But do hang in there. Her behavior is normal for her age and it is too early to make drastic decisions about her future in gymnastics.

Just enjoy what she is doing now. You said she was great at L3. A lot of kids are and that's wonderful but you will find a lot of people tell you that success at L3 doesn't guarantee success at higher levels. It also doesn't preclude it. It's just too early to tell yet.

My advice is to take a deep cleansing breath and give her a couple of years to find her place in the sport. In a couple of years, then you can start asking yourself those painful questions and have some history with which to make some decisions.

ETA: when my kid was 6, she was....oh man.....bouncing off the walls crazy in love but so not detail oriented. She has grown up a LOT in two years and the change in her has been amazing to watch. I bet you'll find the same thing!

 

[soccergymmom]

Thank you cbifoja. I appreciate the advice.

 

[LizzieLac]

I would also add that the "struggling with xxx" is going to come back with other skills down the road. Even gymmies who kick butt on some things or at some levels, have a struggle here and there they must overcome. Just keep supporting her and if the coaching is there, things have a way of working out. Hang in there!!

 

[Gymmonkeymomma]

How does your DD feel about herself? Is she happy? Is she ok with not medaling? Does she feel sad or is she just enjoying training and competing?

My DD is/was small, she turned 6 in July and had her first L4 meet 6 weeks later. Back then we didn't have L3. She had good days and more bad days. She placed sometimes, more often not. Never got that darn mill circle!!! But she stuck with it because she had do much fun and loved gymnastics! We then watched her work and struggle thru L5, twice. Then level 6. Through this she was learning new skills but not placing very often. She had decent scores but not what someone would call "great". It was after that year that things started to come together and now she's having one of her best seasons as a young L9.

So as long as your DD is having fun, and progressing even in tiny amounts, stick with it as long as SHE wants to. We parents are just here to foot the bills and give support

 

[MeetDirector]

OK, what cbifoja said - breathe!

I have been associated with this sport for 12 years (yikes! it didn't seem that long) since our dd was 4. Your frustrations will come and go, but as long as she is loving the sport, just roll with it. You have to reach a point where you put her progression in this crazy sport in the hands of her coaches. It takes a long time to reach that point, but it is worth it when you get there. My dd is a successful lvl 9 now and still loves this sport; we just can't watch the training anymore because it is too frustrating. Watching the end product is so worth it though.

Good Luck.

 

[Moxiegrl83]

I have a 6 yr old, who's birthday was at the end of October too, who's got about the same skills. All I can say is just wait a while, and enjoy her progress as it comes. All the little improvements are fun to see, and as long as she's happy at the gym, don't stress. Like the much loved mill circle....my DD hooked her knee too, but then she started making it around, still bending her knee. A month later, it's not perfect, but it's a lot more straight. Baby steps. Focus on all the stuff shes improving on, and if she gets down, point out what she did better, like improving her vault.

As for her not seeming to do her best, that has to be on her. I know it's frustrating, when you watch and think how much better you "know" they can do. But ultimately, even at 6, it's her gymnastics and how hard she tries, or how well she does is her choice. She will learn to reap the rewards from working hard and doing her best, but needs to figure that out still. Your choice is whether to pay the gym that month.

 

[soccergymmom]

How does your DD feel about herself? Is she happy? Is she ok with not medaling? Does she feel sad or is she just enjoying training and competing?

My DD is/was small, she turned 6 in July and had her first L4 meet 6 weeks later. Back then we didn't have L3. She had good days and more bad days. She placed sometimes, more often not. Never got that darn mill circle!!! But she stuck with it because she had do much fun and loved gymnastics! We then watched her work and struggle thru L5, twice. Then level 6. Through this she was learning new skills but not placing very often. She had decent scores but not what someone would call "great". It was after that year that things started to come together and now she's having one of her best seasons as a young L9.

So as long as your DD is having fun, and progressing even in tiny amounts, stick with it as long as SHE wants to. We parents are just here to foot the bills and give support

She enjoys the practices and being part of the team. She has fun at the meets and is mostly OK with not getting a medal, but then she does get upset about it as well. At our gym's invitational, we split out the 6 year old L4's and she ended up only going up against her own teammates. Which was tough. There were 4 of them and she placed 4th on everything except beam in which she placed 3rd. We went all out on medals she ended up with 5. At first, she was like, I got 5 medals! Then she was like, did I come in last on everything? I told her the truth and she started crying. Makes me sad for her, but all I can do is encourage her to work harder. I am trying to warn her that if she wants to medal at states, she has to get xxx skills. Trying to push her past her fear. But she is stubborn (gee wonder who she got that from) and so who knows.

I hate the mill circle lol! Did I read something in the new rules that says that hooking your knee on the upswing is not a deduction next year (is that a basket swing or am I crazy)?

Congrats to your DD, Gymmonkeymomma. That is awesome that she is now a L9. Gives me hope for my little gymmie!

 

[soccergymmom]

Moxiegrl83......thanks, I am so glad I joined CB. It is so nice to hear similar stories from other parents. And yep, it's on her. Hard to see it, but you're right. I think I need to back off and chill out. Yikes lol!

 

[krisnkids]

I completely agree with the others but wanted to add one thing. Remember, your little 6 year old will constantly have coaches and judges telling her what she is doing wrong and right so don't worry about any of that. Worry about being her biggest cheerleader and encourager. If she gets down on herself about something, bring her back up by reminding her how great she is doing in something else. It sounds like she has a lot of talent, but at such a young age she is going to get frustrated quickly if she cannot do something she thinks she should be able to do. Encourage her to ask for help, ask the coach what she is doing wrong, ask for a spot etc.

I forgot to add about placement. My gymmie struggled her first year at level 4 so her coach, myself and her decided no matter what the meet we went to, her goal was to score better than she did the last time. If she didn't then she would ask her coach what she did wrong and why she scored lower so she knew what to work on.

 

[EastCoastGymMom]

Our state doesn't have many 6 years old that compete L4, but the 6 year olds I've seen at the L4 meets tend to struggle. It sounds like your dd could definitely use another year at L4/new L3, unless they plan to move her up to avoid doing more mill circles and other skills she won't use later on anyway. Our gym does not move girls up from preteam to Level 4 until they have all their L4 skills, especially the really young ones. In hindsight, it may have been a good idea to keep her on preteam a little longer, but since the end of your season is approaching, she'll have a lot of time to work on her skills and form.

She sounds like a very normal (if not advanced!) six year old gymnast! I bet she blossoms and matures as she becomes 7/8/9 years old. No sense stressing her out now!

 

[Gymmommy71]

She's only 6 years old...don't worry . I'd have her repeat Level 4 (lots of gyms make girls do that anyways regardless of scores)...she'd be a young Level 5 at 8 even w/ the repeat. If she loves gymnastics and is having fun, definitely keep her in it. So much can happen in a year in this sport and every kid develops differently.

Oh, and IMO, that mill circle is the worst skill ever......it looks sloppy even when done well, it's painful for the girls when they fall (I see the young little gymnasts come out of practice w/ bruises on their thighs from falling backwards on it and I just hate that move so bad )...and it doesn't seem to have any progression value towards the higher level skills . I was really disappointed to see that the USAG didn't take it out of the new compulsary routines. I will say that if your DD never gets it consistent and has to take a score hit on bars in L4, it certainly doesn't mean, IMO, she won't be able to score well in the higher levels. Basically, don't let the mill circle define your opinion of her gymnastics potential ...

 

[soccergymmom]

krisnkids - Again, you are so right. I feeling very guilty as I read all these wonderful, honest replies because I see that I have made a mistake. It is HER sport, not mine. And starting today I am going to give her a big hug when I pick her up from school, and let her know without a doubt that I support her and believe in her, and as long as she wants to do gymnastics she will have me supporting her. As long as she is happy, I will be happy for her - even if it is in last place. It IS hard for me to see her in last place, because I know what she is capable of. But you all are right - she is the athlete, not me. All I can do is encourage.

And I have told her so many times to ask the coaches what she is doing wrong and how to get a skill. Like the mill circle - she knows that she is supposed to push up and out and keep her arms straight as she comes up and push down on the bar. But she just can't get it. I guess it will just take awhile. Probably states will be here next weekend, and it won't be the best ever and I am just going to have to be OK with that. Thank you all for opening my eyes.

It is still hard though lol!

 

[soccergymmom]

EastCostGymMom - interesting that you say that. Our gym changed ownership last year. I heard with the former owner's, if you didn't have the skills (especially the tumbling), you didn't move up. Therefore, she WOULD have had another year on the pre team. Ah well. It is what it is now. Like you said, plenty of time between now and start of next meet season to get better. Thank you for comments and compliments.

 

[soccergymmom]

She's only 6 years old...don't worry . I'd have her repeat Level 4 (lots of gyms make girls do that anyways regardless of scores)...she'd be a young Level 5 at 8 even w/ the repeat. If she loves gymnastics and is having fun, definitely keep her in it. So much can happen in a year in this sport and every kid develops differently.

Oh, and IMO, that mill circle is the worst skill ever......it looks sloppy even when done well, it's painful for the girls when they fall (I see the young little gymnasts come out of practice w/ bruises on their thighs from falling backwards on it and I just hate that move so bad )...and it doesn't seem to have any progression value towards the higher level skills . I was really disappointed to see that the USAG didn't take it out of the new compulsary routines. I will say that if your DD never gets it consistent and has to take a score hit on bars in L4, it certainly doesn't mean, IMO, she won't be able to score well in the higher levels. Basically, don't let the mill circle define your opinion of her gymnastics potential ...

Yep, she has those bruises. At our gym, all of us parents hate that skill. What is the point......interesting that my dd has no problem with the front hip circle. Which is a L4 skill, but the mill circle skill starts on L3.

 

[MaryA]

I forgot to add about placement. My gymmie struggled her first year at level 4 so her coach, myself and her decided no matter what the meet we went to, her goal was to score better than she did the last time. If she didn't then she would ask her coach what she did wrong and why she scored lower so she knew what to work on.

I agree that focusing on her own improvements, and not about how she's doing compared to anyone else, is important. But scores don't tell the whole story either. A better routine at meet B might get a lower score than her worse routine at meet A... it depends on the judges.

She will never have to do a mill circle again after level 4. A lot of coaches on this site argue that you shouldn't even start competing till level 5 just because then you don't have to spend time learning skills (like the mill circle) that they will never use again.

Some of the tightness/body awareness stuff just comes with age. I want to say DD was about 8 when I watched her and thought, "hey, she's looking like a gymnast out there!" Sure, some kids are born with that, but that's not the norm.

As long as she's loving it, and you are happy with her coaches, try as best you can to trust the process. How she does as a brand-new level 4 has very little to do with how well she'll do as a 5, 6, 7, etc.

We have all BTDT as far as having a hard time watching our kids struggle and looking for that magic solution, but keep in mind that she is learning from the struggle as much as from the accomplishments. When I watch a meet and DD does a beautiful vault and the the HC tells her what she needs to do to make it better, I think, "Wow, she's going to go far in life." because she is comfortable with getting constructive criticism and because she is looking for ways to improve her skills, even when they're already good.

 

[Moxiegrl83]

krisnkids - Again, you are so right. I feeling very guilty as I read all these wonderful, honest replies because I see that I have made a mistake. It is HER sport, not mine. And starting today I am going to give her a big hug when I pick her up from school, and let her know without a doubt that I support her and believe in her, and as long as she wants to do gymnastics she will have me supporting her. As long as she is happy, I will be happy for her - even if it is in last place. It IS hard for me to see her in last place, because I know what she is capable of. But you all are right - she is the athlete, not me. All I can do is encourage.

And I have told her so many times to ask the coaches what she is doing wrong and how to get a skill. Like the mill circle - she knows that she is supposed to push up and out and keep her arms straight as she comes up and push down on the bar. But she just can't get it. I guess it will just take awhile. Probably states will be here next weekend, and it won't be the best ever and I am just going to have to be OK with that. Thank you all for opening my eyes.

It is still hard though lol!

It's a lot easier to preach it then practice it. I work at the gym, she's there all time, so I bite my tongue frequently. There are days I'm so glad to be busy because she drives me nuts the few minutes I can actually watch....but then there are days like yesterday when her coach comes in and tells me she had an awesome beam practice, which she struggles on, and was the only one on her team to get a press handstand. Its a roller coaster, and all you can do is encourage her accomplishments, and get some ice cream on the bad days.

Also, I think a basket swing is different then just a hooked knee mill circle.....and if your little one is making it around, they seem to clean up a lot quicker then learning them. Only 2 of our current L3s have them.

 

[gymdog]

Smile, embrace the crazy, and record every hilariously awkward moment for posterity. She loves it and doesn't want to quit. I guarantee you will look back and smile at these years and wonder where they went. Just be her biggest cheerleader. I have seen kids who at age 6 didn't qualify to level 4 states, were in last place, go to level 10 and test elite.