WAG Coach's comment...

[All Chalked Up]

In the last few weeks my coach has made negative comments about my body type/weight.

Fortunately I'm leaving this gym in springtime, but for the moment I don't know how to deal with this. I believe that comments about body types have no place in the gym... especially when directed towards teenage girls! Advice please

 

[Iwannabemargo]

Good job you are leaving ! - there are so many threads here about athletic builds etc, you are who you are genetically programmed to be. My Boy is short and stocky, my daughter long and lean, genetics, worry about the things you can change and not the things you cant

 

[All Chalked Up]

It did bother me, however I know I'm not a big girl! Shawn Johnson build- definitely not big... muscular. I don't want this to happen to anyone else in my gym with a similar build, and I'm not sure how I should go about doing that...

 

[txgymfan]

Since you are leaving in the spring anyway think of a few subtle things you could say back. Maybe, "well I'm sorry you feel that way, I'm really proud of my strength" or "no my body is not perfect but it does allow me to do XYZ".

I once had a female boss tell me I was "so cute". I said I work really hard I hope I am more than just cute". Same woman called down a long hall to me "hey skinny" after I lost weight. Ugh she drove me crazy with her comments but I out lasted her at the agency.

 

[All Chalked Up]

Those are good ideas, I would just kind of look at her funny and walk away.

I get quite uncomfortable talking to her about things like that as she gets angry/hurt quickly. Don't really know how I could get her to stop

 

[Iwannabemargo]

I would go with " I don't think remarks about my body shape are appropriate" and then I would run away ( cause I'm only a little bit brave lol)

 

[All Chalked Up]

LOL that's definitely my style- get out of there before she can give me conditioning for "back talk" (it's not back talk if I ask you to "please don't call me the F-A-T word") or kick me out of practice!

 

[Faith]

Those are good ideas, I would just kind of look at her funny and walk away.

I get quite uncomfortable talking to her about things like that as she gets angry/hurt quickly. Don't really know how I could get her to stop

If you're leaving anyway maybe just tell her making comments like that is inappropriate in the gym. Or tell her if she has any worries about your health or fitness, or conditioning, maybe she could adjust your training to strengthen that area, or give you some ideas to take to the new gym.

If she thinks you have a real health issue- like losing too much weight, it's something she should discuss privately with you and your parents, not via comments in the gym. Next time she comments ask her if she thinks you should set up a meeting, as her comments are worrying/upsetting you.

 

[All Chalked Up]

I KNOW I'm not big- the doctor commented on my muscles and said I was very healthy, great shape- I just don't want to hear them because I don't want the littler comp girls to hear it and start worrying "if coach A thinks ____ is too big for gym I am too" or whatever. Negative comments on my body type have no place in gymnastics

 

[txgymfan]

Just say that then any of the following three " I really don't want the younger girls to hear this discussion." "According to my doctor I am strong and healthy ( or stronger than most girls my age) " or simply " Negative comments on my body have no place in gymnastics". Tell her what you told us. Simply, directly and without shame.

 

[All Chalked Up]

Thank you! Good ideas again

 

[Flip_Twist_Tumble]

Wow. Why would a coach say that? It doesn't matter the body shape or build of the gymnast, what matters is their gymnastics skills. I know a lot of girls who have all different body types and are very talented. Just ignore the coach's remarks, because listening won't help at all.

 

[All Chalked Up]

Yes that's what I do, I just don't want it to "rub off" on the others

 

[Deleted member D3987]

In the last few weeks my coach has made negative comments about my body type/weight.

Fortunately I'm leaving this gym in springtime, but for the moment I don't know how to deal with this. I believe that comments about body types have no place in the gym... especially when directed towards teenage girls! Advice please

give him the finger. then leave with a smile.

 

[iwannacoach]

give him the finger. then leave with a smile.

I was close to a solution but couldn't quite put my finger on it. Thanks dunno, now I remember what it was.

 

[BlairBob]

That's what we did to our coach when I was about 14. Then we went to the park.

Getting chewed after decimating the other time 13-1. While we were undefeated. OMG 1 run in 7 innings. 2 of our assistant coaches also left before and after that.

Fairly soon after, a lot of our team got burnt out (namely our pitching staff) and our 2nd half of the season wasn't nearly as dominating.

 

[seoulmama]

I admire your desire to protect the other girls at the gym from this coach's negative attitude. I hope your new gym is a good fit for your positive and encouraging attitude, you surely deserve it and not a coach who feels the need to degrade you!

 

[Becauseisaid]

Well, I have a bit of a temper so I'm afraid my response would be along the lines of "THAT is not appropriate. Apologize RIGHT NOW." And there darn well better be a "Yes Ma'am" at the end of the apology.

 

[All Chalked Up]

LOL preferable reaction is the finger... that totally WOULD NOT fly seeing as "please don't say that to me" was considered back talk & resulted in a lot of stair running