Parents Competition Worries

[Ex member]

I don't often post regarding my oldest dd when it comes to worries etc. My dd has a competition in 3 weeks and it will last all weekend and involves an quite expensive hotel stay and a 6 hour minimum drive. My dd went last year and enjoyed it. This year dd has gone up a level in gym and will also be competing trampolining. As far as I know everything is ok with the Artistic Gymnastics side of things but she is worried about the trampolining side of things.

Dd does rec trampolining and she only gets 1 hour a week training not taking time out for warms ups and sharing 2 trampolines with 6-8 other children. Dd is in a disability group and things can get difficult with the behaviour of a few and time is taken with them. Dd has not started her routine and doesn't know what to do, the coach wasn't there this week and the lesson was taken by 2 other coaches who were suppose to go through the routine with dd, they didn't as they had to deal with other issues with other children. Dd has now got 3 lessons left and will only get around 5-10 mins per lesson trampoline time (unless they make other arrangements). Dd is worried that she will not be ready for her comp and I am secretly concerned due to the distance etc if she is not ready or happy. I don't want to put her under pressure and would be happy to not go if that is what she wants.

I don't want her to be worried over nothing or pressured into this comp with little time to do things. I dd does decide not to go will do you think the coach will be upset? It is not dd's fault and this competition was planned months ago. Dd will be doing a 10 bounce routine and is not secure on all the moves, she can do nearly all of the stuff except front drop which is more or less there but needs some work. Dd cannot go through the stuff in her head at home as she has no idea what she has to do.

 

[cbifoja]

If she forgets her routine, she will survive and live on to tumble another day.

Two days before my DD's first optional meet, her coach did a choreography change in her routine where she pulled something from the beginning and put it at the end. My DD struggles with sequencing and as expected....forgot to put the pulled out section back in at the end of her routine. So she sat in her ending pose for about 5 seconds....just holding, holding, holding. It was painful to watch.

Got killed on the score. High 7s because she didn't meet the requirements of the level. But she did better the next meet and the next and by the fourth meet, she wasn't even thinking about forgetting her routine. She didn't get made fun of, didn't get kicked out of the gym....just took a blow on her score.

 

[JMACAZ]

Do you think the overall experience will be worth it for both of you? I was just talking with one of the very high level T&T parents at our gym last night about a travel meet our gym does. She said her daughter did not do well at the meet but LOVED the experience overall. That it was totally worth it for the experience. Do you think she will do well on the artistic side?? If she has most of the moves in her routine on the tramp she should be ok I bet. As long as she is having fun.

 

[Sasha]

First, sorry your DD is worried about performing her skills. It's so hard to know what exactly to say and do to help our dear kiddos when they fret.

It would seem a shame for her to miss the artistic meet when she had fun last year and feels confident, so hopefully you and her coach can help manage her anxiety by encouraging realistic expectations since this is her first real go at the tramp portion.

Is her coach supportive and encouraging? Can you talk to the coach to share your DD's extra anxiety to try to work together on emphasizing just giving her best without worrying about the score?

If your coach isn't encouraging, or has unrealistic expectations for performance as a first-timer, then that's another issue... I'd like to believe that the coach has her best interest at heart, and feels the competition experience will be good for her, regardless of score/placement this first time out.

Hope it works out in her best interest.
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[mommyof1]

I don't know anything about gymnastics competitions yet, but here are my two cents as a mom and as a former competitor in other endeavors: I would treat the competition as an artistic competition with T&T added on just for fun. No pressure at all on the T&T, not even to remember the routine--it's just to see what T&T is like. I would not make or entertain any suggestion of skipping the entire competition, since she has already committed and she enjoyed it last year. If she suggests dropping T&T, I would have her discuss it with the coach.

 

[Ex member]

The coach already knew that dd was worried as she had begun to learn her routine and the coach had written dd's routine into the lesson plan for the stand in coaches to go through, the coaches didn't go through the routine with her and she now has a few rec lessons with a few mins tramp time to learn and clean up the routine. I am on the fence with the comp due to dd not being nowhere near ready and the expense also has a factor, around £200 for the weekend that she is not ready for is not something that I will do lightly, I am willing to go ahead if dd is completely happy (mild worries are ok) but I am not willing to spend that kind of money if she has more serious doubts as I would rather she missed this one then be put off competitions and gym etc due to a bad experience (meltdown), don't forget this is a disability group and change and rushing the routine is not a good thing.

Forgot to add that the coach is away this week and they have stand on coaches for trampoline and gymnastics.

 

[Faith]

I think I'd go with the mindset that she goes and does the artistic.

If she gets there and doesn't want to do T+T, don't. If she is ready to give it a go regardless, then go.

When you get to the week before if she's still not confident then tell the coach she will see how she feels, but you're leaning toward withdrawing from T+T as she doesn't feel prepared. There'll be a next time!

Good luck

 

[Noideaaboutgym]

Is the hotel expense only needed if she does both artistic and trampoline? Or would you need to stay over even if she only did the artistic? If the hotel is needed either way I would let her decide on the day, if the hotel isn't needed then that obviously isn't an option and I would let your DD make her decision now based on how she feels, she is the one who has to put herself out on show.

As an aside and I am not saying this is happening with you but may be relevant for someone. Is DD aware of the costs and that you are concerned about them? I have had a tendency to tell my kids too much so they picked up on concerns about cost etc and the older one will suddenly decide she doesn't want to do something because of the cost but give another excuse , now I have realised what I do I have stopped discussing anything financial when they are around, even if they do look like they are totally engrossed in something else.

 

[Ex member]

I am not giving up just yet, dd is unaware of the cost, just the distance - it is at least a 6 hour drive. I am hoping that something comes up like extra trampoline practice during the gym sessions if needed, I am going to speak to the coach and see what she says, I am happy if she goes or not (despite the expense, cheaper if she doesn't go lol) as long as dd is happy. I guess I find it a bit weird that they have know about the competition for months and have been working on the Artistic side bit not the trampolining side. Maybe the coach thinks dd will be fine with a small amount of practice (coach knows more than me about her ability).

 

[Ali'sMom]

I'd also add in that it depends on how your daughter handles things like this.

My daughter has been out sick for 4 weeks. We thought she'd have 6 weeks out and back with one week before the 2nd meet. We planned that she would focus on everything but bars that week and just scratch (trouble with kips). She was FINE with that. She agreed that she'd rather try even with just one week to polish her routines, than miss it,

We found out she can go back Saturday, one week before the FIRST meet. I said we'd keep the same plan, and she pretty much freaked out. Very anxious, tears, etc. (she does have problems with quick change that she's not prepared for). I explained it was the same plan, "one week, no bars". She tried to think it through, but the worry that she had in the 20 minute drive from doctor too coach told me there was no way she'd be mentally ready. ("I" think she'd be fine, but I could see the tears when she thought about it)

For your DD, I'd say keep the plan to move forward, if/until it bothers your DD so much that she feels she just "can't" do it. If she can stay calm enough to keep moving forward, that's what I'd do. And when it's "this close", ask her how she feels.