Parents How do you know (or do you?) if you child is cut out for this sport?

[rjb123]

Long term I mean? Can you really tell at age 7 if they have the "ability" or whatever to even have a chance of making it to level 10? Does how they perform at that young age tell the tale of what will be (all other things being equal) down the road? What qualities (physical and otherwise) would stand out to you? I was just thinking about he losing thread, the statistics thread, and the thread on talent and wondering how (or if) you can tell who will (or at least has a shot of it!) make it to 10 or higher.

 

[GymBee97]

They tell you they love it!
For us really it never mattered if the kids made the top levels so long as they were having FUN!!. If your child is having fun then anything else is gravy. Think of it like Little League. would you stop your kid from playing if you though he wouldn't make a high school team, the minors or the major league teams? Of course not.

They don't have to be super stars at the young ages to make the top levels. In fact those who it comes easy for at the young levels and are revered to as those super talented kids are the ones that I see quit when they hit optional levels as it isn't so easy anymore. The kids who had to work hard for every skill and weren't always in the top at the lower levels I see usually going on to the upper levels because nothing ever came easy so working harder has been the way it always was.

 

[iwannacoach]

They tell you they love it!
For us really it never mattered if the kids made the top levels so long as they were having FUN!!

They don't have to be super stars at the young ages to make the top levels. In fact those who it comes easy for at the young levels......
......quit when they hit optional levels as it isn't so easy anymore.

The kids who had to work hard for every skill and weren't always in the top at the lower levels I see usually going on to the upper levels because nothing ever came easy so working harder has been the way it always was.

Well said!

I'll add a story to this later. So check and make sure you have some milk and cookies on hand,

 

[Jen H.]

I am going to completely lose all my street cred. here and be totally cheesey and quote this song (by Miley Cyrus no less).
Try and listen to it while thinking about your girls gymnastic journey without crying.
(Or maybe I can just blame PMS)


I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I'm not breaking

I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep going

And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on

'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Somebody's gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

Keep on moving, keep climbing
Keep the faith, baby
It's all about, it's all about the climb

 

[iwannacoach]

Here's a story that might put an exclamation point on GymBee97's post. The story you're about to read is true, but the names and dates (if any) have been changed to protect the anonymous. The described events, actions, and situations took place back when I was coaching 24/365. At the time I was the head coach for our level 8 and 9 ish optional kids. I also had the top level kids on beam, and meddled their other training as time allowed. I was pretty much in the middle of it every day and made it a point to keep track of the lower level kids to see who might join my training group for the next training cycle.

Because of that, I felt I had a pretty good sense of who had a solid future in the optional program, as well as who didn't, and where kids fell between those extremes. It's really not that hard to get it right, or so I thought. I'd look for qualities like strength, potential for flexibility, how fast or slow they moved while doing certain skills, how quickly they caught on to new instructions and progressions, and how they moved while doing skills..... in rhythm, or with little to no coordination. So that's was my "club me over the head" list of physical traits. I'd also want to see if they were hard workers, could handle adverse circumstances and changes, listened well, asked questions, and always showed up for everything.

I felt my lists, gut instincts, and a margin for error were adequate tools to fairly forecast a child's ability to either tolerate..... or thrive in their first year in my group. Surviving the first year would lead to a second year, and then a third. Some of these 3 year kids moved up to the advanced group but no guarantees were given that a move to advanced would stick. The outcome was usually predictable for the "thriving" kids. A few rare kids would make it through to the advanced group in a 15 month train and compete cycle, but most were with me for two years.

So there was this kid named Libby who had moved through the compulsory program in typical fashion, but was on the lower side of average when scores were considered. Basically she was there, but I could go through an entire week without noticing her, and when I did it was either because we were in the same area, or Chuck (her coach) had asked me to watch her doing a new skill.... and those were just a little too few and far between to keep her on my "move up" radar. She did move up, but not to my group.

The beginning optional coach moved her up to his group because she could do the skills in a kinda sorta way, and we always gave kids an informed opportunity if they were close to the standards we felt were necessary for a kid to move up and feel comfortably challenged. So in Libby's case the informed opportunity was a meeting with her and her parents. Chuck led the meeting and I attended to answer questions about her long term prospects. I think they left the meeting understanding that Libby would fit with the group, but would likely struggle if she moved up to the intermediate level at the same pace as the kids she was to join in the beginning group. She and her parents thought about it for a few days and told us she was determined to do it, and it didn't matter what might come in the future.

I'm gonna take a shortcut here and skip over some details, maybe because my memory isn't entirely clear, but also to get me to bed at a reasonable hour.

I'm not gonna boast or take credit for any of the accomplishments I've witnessed and played a role in as a coach. I just want to provide perspective and say there are a mutant handful of kids, no they weren't mutants...... but a typical handful is 5, and there were more than 5 kids I coached who can look to their achievements in the sport and say that on results alone, they had a pretty good run. As it turned out, Libby was among that handful by the time she went off to college at a D1 school. I can't remember if she got a full ride scholarship because I was gone by the time that happened, but that's the way I remember it when I think back to those times.

I also remember she worked harder than most of the kids, and had little time for chatting once the training started. You never know if a kid is going to keep up that kind of work pace, but she did and that's what got her to where she wanted to be.

I'm not saying every kid can work hard for years and end up like Libby, but I'll guarantee you that anybody working as hard as she did will end up one or two levels higher than you'd expect, and those who don't work hard will end up one or two levels lower than thought likely.......

Just ask Libby, she can tell you all about it.

 

[Guenhwyvar132]

Thanks for sharing that story. I always wonder how far I would have gone if my parents wouldn't have made me stop when I was a 10/11 year old level 6. They said they stopped me because they didn't think I'd make it to college. I hoe to never pull my daughter out for that reason, but only when she decides she's ready to move on to other things. She's really young right now and though way more coordinated than my oldest kid not necessarily one if the top at her age so it'll be interesting to see how she progresses.

 

[my4buffaloes]

I am not sure how you tell. But there have been a lot of girls at my dd's gym that I thought would go all the way. They appeared to have the drive, the ability, etc. They worked hard, they scored/placed well, they seemed to love it. And then one day they quit. Because I know some of the parents I know some of the situations. It was still a shock. Injuries played a big role in a few of them. Especially when they had injury, after injury. I think they got tired of having to work so hard to come back just to get injured again. I don't know that you can predict that.

 

[Fliptwisttumble]

I am going to completely lose all my street cred. here and be totally cheesey and quote this song (by Miley Cyrus no less).
Try and listen to it while thinking about your girls gymnastic journey without crying.

I totally agree with your sappy choice I put DD's first gym video to this music.

 

[rjb123]

Thank you all for your replies. I have just been thinking a lot about this lately. DD is a new four, second year competing (did old four last year) and is 7. In our state/ area there are just not kids her age so she ends up competing against kids who are 9 and have had more years, more training etc. She loves gym, works til she drops, and then gets up and works some more. I am her mom so of course "I" think she is amazing and has talent, but she has never scored like other girls in her gym. (there is a group of girls who starting out the season for the past two years score 9.7-9.8 and no I am not kidding!) She tends to hit 9.0-9.4 ish. If I am being really honest, she likely does not have the talent these other kids have. She is younger, yes, but she is not looked at as a "high scorer" and I am not told (as other parents tell me they have been told) that she has "so much potential". She doesn't have the body type that these coaches tend to gravitate towards (very very skinny and tiny- they have 10 year olds who weigh maybe 35 pounds) she hangs around the 40% on growth charts, no fat, all muscle. Super strong legs, and people tell me she has very much of a "mary lou" body as opposed to as "nastia" body (preferred at her gym).
Anyway, the girls who win it all (and they really are amazing!) got an "extra" year at old 4 (last year, DD first was their second) as they were held back when they were similar ages to DD last year. I assumed that since she was SO young, she would get the same. But she has been moved ahead. And she is doing "fine". But I just wonder- she is going to be going up against these kids "forever" who are older, stronger, more years of training, etc and she is always going to play catch up. Is this her gym's way of "weeding her out"? Maybe she doesn't have the ability? She has more work ethic and passion and determination than most kids, but...it seems to me that she is almost being set up to fail. IDK.

 

[luvmygymdtr]

This is a GREAT question RJB and I'm so glad you put it out there. The only thing I can add to it is everyone in my gym, who seems to know anything, will swear that scores at the compulsory, and lower optional levels, mean little, and are not a good indicator at how they will do in 9 & 10.

Have some of you parents of 9s and 10s found this to be true?

 

[vagymmomma]

This is a GREAT question RJB and I'm so glad you put it out there. The only thing I can add to it is everyone in my gym, who seems to know anything, will swear that scores at the compulsory, and lower optional levels, mean little, and are not a good indicator at how they will do in 9 & 10.

Have some of you parents of 9s and 10s found this to be true?

I think level 3 scores mean very little. I think you've got a pretty good idea on natural talent if they're scoring well as a first year L4 or L5. I think gymbee97 and iwc's example are great responses to the original question.

 

[my4buffaloes]

As you progress through the levels the age ranges will even out more and there will be more girls at meets your dd's age and she won't forever be up against girls 2 years older than her. Plus 9.0-9.4 are definitely good (great really!) scores. It sounds like she can hold her own so you probably shouldn't worry.

 

[mouey77]

Thank you all for your replies. I have just been thinking a lot about this lately. DD is a new four, second year competing (did old four last year) and is 7. In our state/ area there are just not kids her age so she ends up competing against kids who are 9 and have had more years, more training etc. She loves gym, works til she drops, and then gets up and works some more. I am her mom so of course "I" think she is amazing and has talent, but she has never scored like other girls in her gym. (there is a group of girls who starting out the season for the past two years score 9.7-9.8 and no I am not kidding!) She tends to hit 9.0-9.4 ish. If I am being really honest, she likely does not have the talent these other kids have. She is younger, yes, but she is not looked at as a "high scorer" and I am not told (as other parents tell me they have been told) that she has "so much potential". She doesn't have the body type that these coaches tend to gravitate towards (very very skinny and tiny- they have 10 year olds who weigh maybe 35 pounds) she hangs around the 40% on growth charts, no fat, all muscle. Super strong legs, and people tell me she has very much of a "mary lou" body as opposed to as "nastia" body (preferred at her gym).
Anyway, the girls who win it all (and they really are amazing!) got an "extra" year at old 4 (last year, DD first was their second) as they were held back when they were similar ages to DD last year. I assumed that since she was SO young, she would get the same. But she has been moved ahead. And she is doing "fine". But I just wonder- she is going to be going up against these kids "forever" who are older, stronger, more years of training, etc and she is always going to play catch up. Is this her gym's way of "weeding her out"? Maybe she doesn't have the ability? She has more work ethic and passion and determination than most kids, but...it seems to me that she is almost being set up to fail. IDK.

I am new to allll of this with my only experience prior to 6 yr old DD being my sister who was a competitive gymnast in the early 90s. So, if you have a 7 yr old competing level 4 (new) and achieving those kinds of scores, I am wondering how you can question her talent/potential? I don't know where you live, but I don't see any children that age competing that level. There is a difference physically between 7 and 9 yr olds. And how many 10 yr olds weigh 35 pounds?! Good gracious. A big yikes to that. Anyways, everything I'm reading seems to lean towards hard work playing a much bigger role than talent. Your DD sounds very impressive to me!

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

I don't know that neither dd nor I are cut out for this sport. What I do know is that dd loves it, and she's working hard at it. If you had asked me if I thought she would make it even this far a year ago, my answer would have been that she would have tired of it and picked up something else. She has always been our "I want to try this activity.... Ok, now I have done that, wasn't my cup of tea, now let's try this other thing" kinda kid whereas her sister found her passion before age 3.
Dd started rec gym at almost 6yo. She was in the beginner class for quite a while, and saw many of the other girls move up ahead of her. Some skills didn't come easy to her, she wasn't super flexible naturally but she had fun and when asked, always wanted to continue going. I remember oohing and aaahing over some of those wunderkinds and the rec head coach kinds laughed at me and said that most of the time, it's really not about natural talent but hard work and training. Dd moved through the ranks at a normal pace, no wunderkind here, and by the time she was in the gold level class in rec a year later she had this one little girl in her class, let's call her Lucy. Lucy was naturally very bendy and clearly way ahead of the other girls in the class even though she was the youngest. Pretty soon, Lucy was snapped up by TOPs. About a year after that, dd had been asked if she wanted to try TOPs but I had always said no, thinking she was not taking things seriously enough... The time came when she really wanted to do it and I let her try and she was accepted. Of course by this time, Lucy had gone through the ranks of TOPs and was 2 levels above dd, not surprising. Dd did Tops for about 5 mo and never advanced (during which time Lucy was put in national tops). Dds previous coach from her gold class really believed in her and kept telling me that doing well in tops didn't mean everything, even though dd was somewhat struggling with the strength requirements she could still become a great team gymnast. I'm glad for that encouragement! Dd was approached by her coach to try team instead as her skill level was much higher than her strength, so she moved over and absolutely loves loves loves it. She advanced faster in team than some kids who had been in higher level tops than she was. She isn't the most talented gymnast on the team, but she works hard, is tenacious and is definitely picking up the skills at a rate I had never believed possible. I also would have never guessed she would work so hard at it, she's always been the easygoing, careless one but she is really working her butt off for this and I am very impressed with her gumption.
And Lucy..? She is now training with the same level dd is in, and although her bar skills look prettier than dds, dd surpasses her in all skills. She is still an amazing little kid and still younger than most on the team, but it is with some pride that I can honestly say that as of right now, my dd is a better team gymnast than she. I'm sure Lucy will catch up and surpass dd, and that's ok, I will be happy for her when she does, but for now, hard work has temporarily trumped natural talent. I highly doubt that dd will ever become a level 9 or 10, and that's ok with me. As long as she is having fun and loving it, we're good! Are we cut out for this...? A year ago, I would have said no way. Now, I'm saying for as long as she wants to be, she is!
Oh, and during the past year, she was doing other activities. When she was asked to do level 4, the time commitment was such that she had to choose between doing team and cutting out everything else or going to a high rec class and continuing with all her activities. She obviously chose team!

 

[Fliptwisttumble]

Thank you all for your replies. I have just been thinking a lot about this lately. DD is a new four, second year competing (did old four last year) and is 7. In our state/ area there are just not kids her age so she ends up competing against kids who are 9 and have had more years, more training etc. She loves gym, works til she drops, and then gets up and works some more.

DD competed old L5, so equivalent to new L4 when she was 7. She is a hard worker as well. There were not a lot of kids competing that level, because they are only 7, and many kids are in rec, or lower levels at that age. That is why she is competing with 9 year olds, etc. this is an ACCOMPLISHMENT!

I am her mom so of course "I" think she is amazing and has talent, but she has never scored like other girls in her gym. (there is a group of girls who starting out the season for the past two years score 9.7-9.8 and no I am not kidding!) She tends to hit 9.0-9.4 ish.

I think that some of the finesse that gets kids from a 9.0 to a 9.8 comes with time/age, but is sometimes less important (don't shoot me here) at younger ages. Last year DD's coaches said they would forego some of the finesse they would require of older kids at DD's level, because they looked at it as a step to the next level, as opposed to focusing on the scores. They wouldn't have let her compete that way at say a provincial qualifier, but she competed invitationally just to get some competition experience. It was OK. And as for not being told "she has so much potential from coaches"..... I never heard that from any coach until the end of last year...... She was 8 years old competing L7. Just because no one says anything doesn't mean hey don't have a plan, and I highly doubt they would move her up if they didn't think she could handle it.

She doesn't have the body type that these coaches tend to gravitate towards (very very skinny and tiny- they have 10 year olds who weigh maybe 35 pounds) she hangs around the 40% on growth charts, no fat, all muscle. Super strong legs, and people tell me she has very much of a "mary lou" body as opposed to as "nastia" body (preferred at her gym).

This is my daughter to a tee. She is sort of smallish in terms of height, but is built like a Mac Truck. She is 9, weighs likely 65-70 lbs....100% a lean fighting machine. She is the Shawn Johnston to all the Nastias out there. I don't give two hoots about that, and thankfully neither does she (although she has recently taken up ballet to look more like the Russian gymnasts she so admires). She is the powerful muscular type, and when designing routines they pick skills and music that caters to that (I recognize you can't do that in level 4).

She has worked her tail off,and continues to do so. She surrounds herself with people like her at they gym,and enjoys it. It is her experience. Whether she hit L10 or stops tomorrow, we can say that she did it because she wanted to and she enjoyed it. I would not worry about your DD and let her enjoy what she is doing, and let her excel at the pace she is comfortable with. I expect she is not being "weeded out" but rather is being moved along at the rate the coaches think will work best for her

 

[Jen H.]

Oh yeah, and see my sig.

 

[Kiwi]

Does it matter if they don't reach level 10? I don't expect my DD to get that far, I just want her to go as far as she can, for as long as she wants to do it. I don't think it means she isn't "cut out for" the sport, she probably isn't "cut out" to go to the top in any sport. But if only the extremely talented took up a sport, there would not be many people doing sports. I am happy she got the opportunity to try a competitive sport, as she is learning many valuable life lessons. I've also seen others who were more talented give up due to injury, mental blocks and so on.

 

[GymBee97]

It doesn't matter what level they reach so long as they are having FUN!

 

[iwannacoach]

DD is a new four, second year competing (did old four last year) and is 7. In our state/ area there are just not kids her age so she ends up competing against kids who are 9 and have had more years, more training etc......rjb123

Are you kidding me? A first year kid will almost always be the runt of the litter. Don't be surprised if this coming season sees your daughter pull up to level, or nearly, with the girls who had a one year head start.

I don't know that neither dd nor I are cut out for this sport. What I do know is that dd loves it, and she's working hard at it........She advanced faster in team than some kids who had been in higher level tops than she was. She isn't the most talented gymnast on the team, but she works hard, is tenacious and is definitely picking up the skills at a rate I had never believed possible. I also would have never guessed she would work so hard at it, she's always been the easygoing, careless one but she is really working her butt off for this and I am very impressed....SurprisedGymMom

Well you can doubt that you're cut out for the sport, but so far it looks like your darling daughter is. Consider talent and experience as a piece of paper. Add to that the entire alphabet minus the vowels, and try the two together to write an interesting story..... You quickly discover the futility of attempting that task with essential parts missing. You really do need the vowels.....

Let me introduce you to a good supply of vowels.....

When she was asked to do level 4, the time commitment was such that she had to choose between doing team and cutting out everything else or going to a high rec class and continuing with all her activities. She obviously chose team!....SurpriseGymMom

If I had to choose between a kid who could barely walk and chew gum, and an obviously capable kid who didn't care to dedicate herself nearly as much as the gum chewing dreamer........ I'd choose the gum chewing dreamer because they usually get to their own personal "there" and are a delight to work with.

Sure, there's a bunch of talented kids that work hard and surpass the gum chewers because everyone can have a dream. What's odd is the quit rate seems higher in the talented group..... Maybe it's true that nothing great comes easily.

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

Thanks for the insight iwannacoach! I do feel like dd has found her thing and as long as it makes her happy I will support her in her choice! My fears (for her) while she was in tops and to some extent still is that she will get discouraged by people passing her by and moving up faster than her. Nobody likes feeling like everyone is better than them... Now in her team I would say she's in the middle of the pack, some of her skills are better than others but all in all she's progressing very nicely. The most important thing is that she is working very hard at it, not giving up and seeing that it does indeed pay off, everything she can do she made happen herself (with the help of coaching of course!). That will be invaluable for the rest of her life.