Off Topic Questioning Adult Mentality

[Linsul]

I have nothing to add here but support for school administration and arbitrary awards rules. I myself had an epic battle with my daughters nurse, principal, superintendent, and eventually the school board itself very recently that lasted for weeks. I feel your pain. My daughter is...I don't know the word here. I guess a little too wise to the academic system. One minute she's singing along to iCarly music, and the next she's telling my her reading grade is just a number that doesn't reflect what she actually can read. Good times. She's not sophisticated enough to make a compelling argument aside from "the school reading stories are awful, I don't care about Juan and his special shoes. It's dumb and I don't care, so of course I don't know the answers!" She finished the year with an 86%avg but they tallied honor roll grades before the very end so she was not a recipient at the awards assembly. I told her to cheer her friends and we'd go to ihop anyway (ihop is like a 5 star meal to her for some reason) to celebrate her bringing it up from a 78% so quickly.

The honor roll thing happened while I was dealing with her nurse issue, it never occurred to me that they could be linked. Whatever though, she dug in and got it done so we're happy! She got hit in the face so hard her doctor checked for 'orbital fracture' I believe the term was. Nobody called me, she finished her school day with a swollen, black and blue face with a 3 bags of ice. When I came at the chain of administrative command with phone records that showed I was never contacted (after getting shut down assuming they'd take my word for it) they shut down even more! The school board was VERY interested though thankfully.

Having to ride them like Seabiscuit for resolution has been torturous. Truly I sympathize.

I have to Edit for the teachers in attendance! I was explicit in my adoration of DD's teacher, she really is fantastic. She's got 19 other kids to teach, as soon as she passed her to the nurse her job was done. Nurse dropped the ball. As far as DD's teacher knew, the nurse made the right call with ice and probably just couldn't contact us or something.

 

[gymjourneymom]

Thanks for taking the time to share your story Linsul! I clearly remember how stressful it was when I was dealing with my DD's situation. It was physically, mentally & emotionally draining! So sorry you & your DD had to endure all of that! Glad your DD was ok & the nurse's inaction didn't cause DD any further issues. There are good & bad everywhere & in every profession unfortunately! Thank goodness the good usually out number the bad.

 

[lilgymmie7]

Thank you to both Gymjourneymom and Linsul for your personal insight. It allows me to realize that I am not alone. At times we may feel that way because we are so invested emotionally. It takes hearing from others to make us realize that we are not alone and like others we will be okay. My DS is such a big part of me obviously, but his kind heart and loving nature( that he mostly shows to my husband and me)causes me to dig deeper when finding ways to help him. There are both positives and negatives to that I am finding. However, we are all life-long learners in this game of life.

 

[Tumblequeensmom]

Lilgymmie, being a teacher I'm sure you know that mentioning that an IEP has been "violated" you have enter legal territory. I'm sure that is why the Principal "shut down", as not to cause any legal issues for the school district. I've had some experience with this and it did all work out in my DD's best interest in the end. But this was a wall I hit...right away the school assumed I was looking to sue. That was an idea that I NEVER even entertained for one minute! But there are all kinds of parents that they deal with. You have to show them that you truly are just looking out for the best interest of your children...not looking for money(in regards to the IEP situation).

My advice is to choose your battles wisely & get as many people as you can on yours & your kids side throughout their school years. Making enemies will not help you in the long run. You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar in ALL areas of life! A parents reputation within a school district can come into play in MANY ways!!! Being a "likable" parent CAN benefit the child in school & the flip side of that is also true. I've seen it with my own eyes! I'm living proof that you can be a "likeable" parent & still stick up for your child. It's all in how you go about it. I thank goodness I was in such good standing within the school district before going into all of that. We had a built in army of teachers & administrators ready to go to bat for my DD at a moments notice, just by her & I having a good reputation among them. Good luck!

At my school, we take our student's IEPs VERY seriously because we definitely do not want even want a hint of a lawsuit. Most IEP accommodations are very easy and straight forward.... i.e. small group testing, modfied tests/homework assignments, and other very simple accommodations. I can't believe a teacher would say that "she doesnt' believe in IEPs." Whether she does or not, she is legally bound to follow those IEP accommodations!!!! WOW... glad she is out of the school system.

It is VERY TRUE that you get more services, wait, let me restate, BETTER services for your child if you approach your child's teacher as part of a TEAM in the education process. We've had parents who are really hateful to us, badger us to death and just make working with their child an unpleasant experience. If we work w/the child for HOURS to prepare them for a math test (because the parents don't want to bother BECAUSE the child has an IEP), and they don't do well, then it is OUR fault. WHAT?!?!? I could literally write a book, as I'm sure all you other teachers could do the same. At any rate, when a parent is a partner, it just makes things so much easier for us AND the child!!