Parents Should I ask or keep my mouth shut?

[RTT2]

DD joined the Bronze Xcel team at our gym over the summer. She turned 8 in August, and had spent most of last year just doing the one hour rec class. She'd done a class when she was 5 at a different- and less competitive gym, but last fall was basically the start of her really doing gymnastics. Last spring they had tryouts for Xcel and she was invited to join the team. She absolutely loves it and has been working really hard. This gym is competitive and she's not one of the kids who was picked out and tracked to JO. I've been impressed by how quickly she's learning new skills and how much she's developed now that she's gone from one hour a week to seven (of course I realize my being impressed by my own kid's skills isn't exactly notable!)

DD has asked me several times if she can move to JO at some point, but I have no idea. The coaches aren't known for being particularly good at communicating with the parents, but I assume if they thought she belonged on JO they'd tell me at some point. So, should I just wait and see how this year goes and assume they'll say something to me if she's developing into a kid who should move to JO? Or is it once you're tracked to Xcel that's it? We're in Region 6 if it matters.

 

[sevenatenine2]

I would ask---it wouldn't hurt anything and it would let them know she was interested. I'd go to the front desk or send an email to the HC.

At the front desk, I'd say, "Hey, Kid X is really enjoying gymnastics. She was wondering if it's possible for her to make the move to JO at the end of the season. I don't really know how all this works, so I thought I'd ask and see if that's something y'all do."

If I emailed the coach, I'd say, "Good morning! Kid X is so enjoying her gymnastics experience! Thanks for everything you've done for her. She was wondering if it is possible for her to make the move to JO after the competition season. I wasn't sure how that worked and if they were allowed to switch from one track to the other, so I thought I'd ask. Thanks so much for your time!

Sincerely,

Mom X"

 

[IreneKa]

Definitely ask! Sooner rather than later. Many gyms have separate JO and Xcel tracks, with no mobility from Xcel to JO. If that's the case in your gym, and she really wants to do JO, you might have to look for other options.
I'm in region 6 too, don't know if it matters, but we had to switch gyms for this exact reason.

 

[bookworm]

Region 6 has one of the biggest Xcel programs in the country...but there are plenty of gyms that do both JO and Xcel. You said she "really wants to do JO" but at her age, does she actually know what it is? and what is her reasoning for wanting JO? Xcel kids have plenty of competitions and practice 3-4 times a week in our neck of the woods so they're in the gym more than rec. I definitely see Xcel as a kinder, gentler nation in the world of gymnastics..

I guess my advice would be to find out what she thinks she would be getting by doing JO, and if it seems reasonable, present it to the gym as "Susie wants to do JO next year, not Xcel" because to me, if you give them the option to refuse her, they just might. She might have been invited to Xcel because the coaches felt that she'd have a less frustrating time with gymnastics in that track but if she's improved a lot, then it never hurts to ask.

 

[Mrs. Puma]

Yeah Region 6! I agree with the others-as long as it's phrased appropriately, I think there's no harm in asking. Maybe just ask if there in any mobility between the two in general rather than specifically ask about the end of the season? Just a thought. Then you can feel it out. Good luck!

 

[RTT2]

Thanks for the feedback! I'm actually nervous about asking. All of the coaches at this gym are really nice, but I have this fear they'll look at me with pity while thinking, "Poor deluded Mom, don't you realize how talented the JO girls actually are?!"

 

[gymdog]

I don't think it hurts to ask. Just phrase it in general terms of wondering if it's a possibility down the line. In some gyms, it is a possibility. In others, it's not. Also, some gyms are stricter than others in the body type and physical abilities they are looking for in JO.

 

[momof2gymmies]

We are in region 6 as well. It doesn't hurt to ask, and I second the sooner you do it the better. At our gym if you are over 6/7 you can't do JO. All of our level 4s are 7, except for 2 who turned 8 this school year. A few are still 6, and just not competing till they reach their b-day. But def ask, since if it is what she wants she should be given a chance.

 

[IreneKa]

Thanks for the feedback! I'm actually nervous about asking. All of the coaches at this gym are really nice, but I have this fear they'll look at me with pity while thinking, "Poor deluded Mom, don't you realize how talented the JO girls actually are?!"

So what, if that's what they think? Everyone is entitled to their own opinion.
My DD was in Xcel. When I first asked her coaches about the possibility of JO, they laughed and said "she is not a JO material". Then the owner told me he "doesn't see it in her".
We went to another gym, DD competed JO for two years, and every time I ran into the owner in the hallway she would stop me tell me how good DD is, and how glad she is that we came to her gym, and she really sees her doing well and going far. DD is currently back to Xcel, but because of the health issues, not because of the lack of talent.

I don't know where you are in region 6, but in our area there are many gyms within 30 minutes drive, so there are definite options to consider, if the current gym wouldn't give her a chance.

 

[Sasha]

Ask!

My DD was not 'picked' for JO either, and started in rec, then Xcel. We had to inquire, at age 7 (nearly 8). She was given an 'evaluation', then a tryout for a week with the team.

Guess who is now a top scorer for the JO team?

Every gym is SO different in how these things work.

Note: I do agree with the poster above who asked WHY your daughter wants to do JO. Does she want more hours than Xcel offers (and are you as a parent ready for that long-term commitment?)? Is she ready for more conditioning and (probably) focus on tiny form details at the (possible) sacrifice of a slower pace of skill progression? Make sure your daughter REALLY understands the difference, and REALLY wants the change AND you are prepared for the potentially HUGE commitment down the road. If all signs point to JO being the best fit on all those points, then definitely pursue! And be prepared to seek other gyms if JO really is your daughter's dream and this gym isn't the fit. Or be prepared to be content with Xcel (which I believe is an amazing program).

Good luck!

 

[RTT2]

Metro West Boston, so there is a pretty good selection of gyms, although I'm quite happy with where we are right now (all of this stuff is in my head since I've never had a conversation with anyone about it).

 

[MeetDirector]

You need to ask as soon as possible. If she has aspirations beyond club gym, the sooner you get on the JO track, the better. Xcel is good for what it is, but it will not get a talented athlete beyond club gymnastics.

 

[Mrs. Puma]

We are in region 6 as well. It doesn't hurt to ask, and I second the sooner you do it the better. At our gym if you are over 6/7 you can't do JO. All of our level 4s are 7, except for 2 who turned 8 this school year. A few are still 6, and just not competing till they reach their b-day. But def ask, since if it is what she wants she should be given a chance.

Wow! That illustrates the differences in gyms, even within the same region. We also only have two 8 year old L4s, but the rest are OLDER.

 

[IreneKa]

Metro West Boston, so there is a pretty good selection of gyms, although I'm quite happy with where we are right now (all of this stuff is in my head since I've never had a conversation with anyone about it).

Sent you a PM.

 

[munchkin3]

RTT, ask away.....it's better to know the path now before she is too set in the XCEL mind frame.....

Get used to the 'poor deluded mom' feeling! For some reason this is a common feeling for ALL parents!
I've been in JO for 9 years, and I still feel like a clueless parent when asking the coaches anything

 

[Aussie_coach]

Yes ask, the worst they can say is that they don't have those plans at all in your daughters future and that will leave you in a position to decide how and if you are going to tell her that.

Sometimes it helps if the gym knows what her aspirations are.

 

[needcoffee]

I'm not in the U.S. but I've read enough on here to know it's totally gym dependant. So definitely no harm in asking what your gym does. I follow quite a few teenagers on Instagram who are doing JO levels 3/4 and definitely not what I would call talented.. And then you have your gyms to put an age limit on it and have no chance after 5 years old..

Totally get the deluded mum feeling too! Sometimes I try so hard to keep my inner crazy in check, and don't ask questions when I want to, that I probably come across and a completely disinterested cow...

 

[seoulmama]

I sent a PM, too! I have a dd who just switched from JO to Xcel, I might have useful advice (or not!)

 

[momof2gymmies]

I sent a PM as well - I have 2 who do xcel, both of whom are deemed too old for JO, pretty close to you.

 

[tooootsie]

Wow! That illustrates the differences in gyms, even within the same region. We also only have two 8 year old L4s, but the rest are OLDER.

I agree.. the 4 team at our gym has all 12 year olds,and 1 9 year old. Next year my little will be the youngest on l4 team at 8.