Parents Friday night exhaustion

[luvmygymdtr]

We have a reoccurring problem with my daughter, and that is the exhaustion that creeps in by Friday nights. She is scheduled to be at the gym 20 hours a week. I don't think she has made it 20 hours yet. She is scheduled M-Sat, with Wednesdays off. During the week practice ends at 9:00. We live close to the gym so generally I rush to have her fed, showered and in bed by 9:30.
On Fridays, more often than not, I am getting a call from one of her coaches to pick her up because she's sick. Well, she always looks sick, so I don't think she is faking, but she never ends up getting sick, she sleeps it off by morning and is ready to go to Saturday practice. The Fridays I haven't gotten a call, she's a puddle of tears on the way home because of some "injury" that miraculously goes away by morning.
Fridays are a really great night at the gym in terms of coaching so I would really like to see her there on that particular night. She is 10. What is some advice to help her get through her whole week of practice? Or is it time I just conclude 20 hours is too much for her, 9:00 is just too late, and scale back on the hours.

 

[bookworm]

Fridays are a really great night at the gym in terms of coaching so I would really like to see her there on that particular night. She is 10. What is some advice to help her get through her whole week of practice? Or is it time I just conclude 20 hours is too much for her, 9:00 is just too late, and scale back on the hours.

Bingo....

 

[bogwoppit]

Absolutely. Ditch the Friday practice and let her relax. It sounds like it is just too much for her right now. DO look at her nutrition and hydration as well, as those two things can have a big impact on energy levels.

 

[Muddlethru]

Some kids can handle even more than 20 hours a week and some have trouble with 15. I think it too is best to lay back on the hours unless she is on an elite route. If she is, you may need to have a serious talk. I also wonder if she is getting enough or quality sleep. Having only 30 mins to get home, eat and shower may not be enough time for the body to wind down. When does she do homework?

Lastly, my daughter's least favorite practice day is Friday. She said it is among the hardest practice of the week. They give "assignments" that are almost impossible to complete. Since she hates not being able to complete assignments (i,e., stick 6 beam routines in 10 mins), which she says is usually impossible to complete because a beam routine is about 1.30 mins and they share beams, she still tries her hardest to do it and this causes her stress. You said Friday practice at your gym is "a great night due to coaching", could the Friday night practice be too intense for her that she just prefers not to go? Just a thought.

 

[sleeping judy]

My 9 year old also has 20 hours a week and we scale back if it's too much. She actually goes Monday through Thursday and then Saturday which at first I thought would be a nightmare, but having Friday off really opens up her weekends. If she needs a night off, I give her a night off. We also worked something out with the school that she leaves 20 minutes early, skipping PE which gives her more free time before practice.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

this kid needs a rest...give her another school night off. it's too much. you did a good job of explaining what is going on. pay now, or pay later when she fries out.

 

[CanAmGymMum]

9:00 is really late to end practice for a 10 year old and, like you suggest, she is probably way too tired by the end of the week to get an effective practice in. I would try taking Thursday off. Hopefully her coach will be understanding. That way, she goes 2 days, has 2 days off then trains another 2 days. Hopefully she can get to bed early on the days she doesn't have training to keep her well rested. Good luck

 

[luvmygymdtr]

this kid needs a rest...give her another school night off. it's too much. you did a good job of explaining what is going on. pay now, or pay later when she fries out.

Thank you, that's what I was afraid of. And to think, I was so excited for her when she was given the opportunity to go 20 hours.
CanAmGymMum - Good logic on Thursday. I think that's what we will do.

 

[my4buffaloes]

Another option would be to end practice early at least 1 day of the week. Better to be done by 8 another day than to miss all of friday. 9 is very late for a 10 year old, I would think they would understand and figure out which night would work best to leave early.

 

[gymmommy123]

I am not in your shoes, but I know 9 pm is really late for most kids, that makes for a LONG day. I'd try ending an hour early one or two nights and see if that helps. She'd still get a lot of hours in, but that extra hour of sleep may really help. Or purposely end Fridays at 8pm so she doesn't have to reduce to tears and have the coaches call you. I imagine she truly does feel sick by the end of the week, that's an exhausting schedule for even the most motivated kid.

 

[Supportive_Mum]

I am not in this position but have thought about what i will do should we get to it. Is there any chance for an afternoon sleep before practice?

 

[gymdog]

All those school nights until 9 is really late for elementary schoolers. I would scale back so she can sleep earlier. What time does she have to wake up?

 

[GYM0M]

How long has she been on this schedule? My 7 year old works out about that much for about 2 years now. But even when her schedule changes she goes through a bit of transition exhaustion but within a few weeks she has adjusted to her new schedule. She works out everyday, M-F, 3:30-8:00, throughout the school year & still attends public school. In the summer it's 6 hours a day (split into 2 three hour sessions) M-Th, 3 hours on Friday. She has the weekends off, except for competitions. The first few weeks are pretty rough, BUT she never complains about going to gym. It's usually just being whiny and not wanting to get up!

 

[luvmygymdtr]

All those school nights until 9 is really late for elementary schoolers. I would scale back so she can sleep earlier. What time does she have to wake up?

I have to agree that the issue is more about ending at 9 than the 20 hours. She did 20 hours easily during the summer. Next year her hours will be 3-7 and I imagine that will go much better. She is allowed to sleep until 7:30 most mornings, but doesn't always make it that late and wakes up earlier.
Leaving early most nights would seem like a good option except Mon & Tues end with the same event-bars, from 8-9. She lives for those bars. I would have to drag her out kicking and screaming from the gym, it would be a scene.

 

[bookworm]

Leaving early most nights would seem like a good option except Mon & Tues end with the same event-bars, from 8-9. She lives for those bars. I would have to drag her out kicking and screaming from the gym, it would be a scene.

If I thought this was the issue and that she had to leave before 9 to not be a complete mess for the rest of the week, I would lay down the law with her and tell her so...address it with her coach that she will be leaving early , tell her that when you come in early to pick her up she is to come willingly and without fanfare, or there will be consequences ...I'd tell her if you don't leave the gym when I tell you without a scene, don't worry about going back, because you won't be....

 

[luvmygymdtr]

...I'd tell her if you don't leave the gym when I tell you without a scene, don't worry about going back, because you won't be....

Haha-Bookworm, You and I have VERY similar parenting styles because your words sounds exactly like something I would say.. No doubt, I'm strict and tough and could get her out of that gym if I needed to. But I was kind of just kidding. The point I was trying to make, and obviously it fell flat, is she loves those bars, and I don't want to take that away from her. But no doubt, you are 100% right, I need to address this issue, she's exhausted, but pulling hours is hard and makes me a little sad. But certainly is the right thing to do.

 

[txgymfan]

What about pulling her at 8 on Tues and Thurs? See if those two hours make a difference and then take away more hours if need be.

 

[CanAmGymMum]

As a coach, I would rather a child be pulled from practice for one day than to consistently miss the same event and possibly some conditioning twice a week. As a parent, I think missing one entire practice per week would be more beneficial to rest my child both mentally and physically than pulling her out an hour early. This, of course, is just my opinion based upon a child I have never met

 

[my4buffaloes]

What about just trying to pull her 1 hour early once a week and see if you notice a difference in her energy level (mental and physical). If so, could you alternate a tuesday and thursdays each week? I imagine pulling her 1 hour early on Thursdays would really help with the friday meltdowns. Kids are always more tired by the end of the week. When my older dd practiced Friday nights by the last rotation she was a mess too - every single week.

 

[gracyomalley]

cut her back somehow - and a full practice off would likely be more beneficial than than leaving early (from Pediatrician standpoint). From Parent standpoint, I know that DD11 did great with 20 hours a week, plus open gym often, last year but this year has declined the offer of training with the higher level girls on Wed to have an evening off....I worried this was the "beginning of the end" but really, she's just noticing what her body/brain needs...last year she might have been happier/easier to live with had I made her take more time off and not get so exhausted...don't know for sure - but unless you have the Olympics in mind, a 10 year old does not need that many hours - even for college goals!