Parents Fun snatcher

[SuperMama]

At my daughters gym they don't officially compete until L3 so for the pre-team girls they do an end of year in house meet. My daughter was all about that meet. Now that it's over I've noticed the last few practices have been progressively worse for her. She's been zoning out and/or intentionally giving up on that didn't come easily. Fast forward to tonight where she had to be spoken too a few times by her coach for not listening and then was goofing off in a way that I felt was unsafe.

After several subtle attempts to tell her that it's important to pay attention, this time I gave her a long lecture on the way home about how we expect her to be a good listener and be respectful of the coach. Also about how she should be trying her best and how she cannot improve (in any activity) if she doesn't work hard.

She said that she couldn't do the activities because either her hands hurt (from bars) or her arms hurt (from the activities I guess) but I didn't give her much attention on the pain out of frustration with her poor behavior that evening.

It occurred to me after some down time that she may have lost her motivation now that the shiny goal of preparing her skills for a meet is gone and that I may have been sucking the fun out of the activity with all of the nagging.

DD is a sweet girl and a sensitive kid so she can get very discouraged when things don't go her way. I think I made a mommy faux pas by pushing too hard. [emoji53]

Any non-nagging tips to helping little ones overcome the frustration when things get tough? I want her to feel confident vs feeling like she should give up when a task is too challenging. We're working on this lesson outside of the gym as well so any tips are welcome.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

It's June. They are tired. End of year/season. And up training is starting, ''tis achy season, rips etc...

I recommend a day off and ice cream.

Oh and let the coach handle it and don't watch practice.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Any non-nagging tips to helping little ones overcome the frustration when things get tough? I want her to feel confident vs feeling like she should give up when a task is too challenging. We're working on this lesson outside of the gym as well so any tips are welcome.

Specfic to this ....

I talk out loud. About things I struggle with. I let her her hear me verbally work through it. Hmmm that dish was Ok for a first try, next time I need to try a or c.

For us it is also an ongoing conversation about effort. When she was little and got a new skill, even back in her first bike days or learning a song or the alphabet. It see you practiced and practiced and before you knew it you could do it.

Now that she isn't a tiny tot. We focus on effort. We have treat days when I know she has been working hard or gotten a new skill that took a long time. I remind her when she thought something she does automatically didn't look so good and took a long time. She forgets when she was 3 1/2 she had only the beginnings of a butt ugly cartwheel and it took months to get it to look like and ugly cartwheel. So we watch the video. I remind her there was a time when she couldnt ride a 2 wheeler. And show her the video of how proud she was to finally steer her little bike with training wheels.

Or when she didn't just know 2+2 was 4 but she needed her fingers.

I tell her things I want her to tell herself. So we don't focus on medals, meets or Leo's.

And even when she does well at something, we talk about what worked, what didn't and what could we do different, be it gym, tests, projects at school, time management.

It's on going but not all the time.

But no, no nagging.

 

[SuperMama]

Glad to know it's that time of year.

I love the idea of showing the old videos to give her context for how far she's come with different things. I will definitely try that and the talking out loud when I'm working through a challenge.

Thanks for all of the great tips!

Oh and we went for ice cream today [emoji4]

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Glad to know it's that time of year.

I love the idea of showing the old videos to give her context for how far she's come with different things. I will definitely try that and the talking out loud when I'm working through a challenge.

Thanks for all of the great tips!

Oh and we went for ice cream today [emoji4]

My daughter got a 70 on a take home test. I wanted to choke her. Because she didn't have us check it. A take home test is a gift from your teacher.

Saw her teacher the next day. Teacher said I wish I had 20 of your daughter in my class. I was like thanks but I want go choke her about that dang test. Teacher busted out laughing, yep it's the end of year, I remind them daily they are not done yet.....

Spring fever.

 

[e'smum]

fun - keep it fun! i can't emphasize it enough - probably because it's a lesson our family learned in the last couple of weeks. if she needs to work on listening skills and staying on task, do that at home but don't equate it with gymnastics at all.

honestly, gymnastics is hard work. if they truly love it, nurture the love of the sport and emphasizing the fun times so that will be in their minds when they have hard times and want to quit.

also, give her a break if she needs it. skills won't go away if you miss a practice. they really won't. and she may go back in the next time with a renewed sense of loving the sport.

 

[SuperMama]

My daughter got a 70 on a take home test. I wanted to choke her. Because she didn't have us check it. A take home test is a gift from your teacher.

Saw her teacher the next day. Teacher said I wish I had 20 of your daughter in my class. I was like thanks but I want go choke her about that dang test. Teacher busted out laughing, yep it's the end of year, I remind them daily they are not done yet.....

Spring fever.

I can TOTALLY relate to this! Lol

 

[SuperMama]

also, give her a break if she needs it. skills won't go away if you miss a practice. they really won't. and she may go back in the next time with a renewed sense of loving the sport.

Great idea. She'll be missing next week due some planned travel. Looks like it couldn't have come at a better time!