Parents How to handle the group knucklehead

[momto2js]

Like most training groups, there is a knucklehead that trains with my son. You know the kid with a huge amount of natural talent, that has the attention span of a toddler the self control of a zebra, and things that if you can put a peice of paper between 2 people it is plenty of personal space.

Generally he takes turns annoying as many folks as possible and they do a pretty good job, for kids, managing his behavior and the group insulates itself pretty well.

Our state meet schedule was just released and it just happens that my kid and the knucklehead, are alone together in a session. This means my kid, who is on the regional bubble, will be the continously target for this kid for 4 hours at the meet.

Should I talk to the coach about it? How do I prep my kid, I know he will be nervous and the consistent provoking may be enough to push my kid right over the edge. I would the for my kid to slug the knucklehead in the middle of the meet but he would deserve it! Any advise?

 

[duyetanh]

If the child truly takes this behavior he displays at practice and does it at a meet, and the coach hasn't called him on it yet? I feel bad saying this, but it probably won't change. Based on what you are telling me though, if it is really bugging you, you could make it all about your son so to speak, rather than the other child. Not sure how you would do this though...how old are they anyway?

 

[momto2js]

My son is 9 the other kid is 8

 

[munchkin3]

This can be absolutely problematic to your son. My son had this for several years and he would come home beside himself......not to mention, the knucklehead found my sons button very easily..........I would definitely talk to the coach about it and just tell your son to focus on himself. Young kids have a very hard time separating socializing and bugging/fighting so the other kid probably has no idea he is a pain......just prepare your son in a positive way and tell him to ignore the kid and ask the coach to keep them a few feet apart.....
Hopefully this kid will behave differently at the meet. A lot of times, these hyper kids get very relaxed and focused during extreme pressure.

 

[profmom]

If it's only the two of them, things may well be different at the meet. If you can catch 'em both at practice, maybe try saying something to both about how they'll have each other's backs when they are competing together with just the two of them. But I'd probably have a quiet word with the coach as well.

 

[Sasha]

What kind of behaviors are you concerned about? Being just overly chatty/annoying - like constantly won't stop talking instead of listening - disruptive with poor social skills - but isn't mean? Or some annoying (but not harmful) physical playing/poking/bugging? Or is there more overtly "mean" behavior like insulting/name calling or harder physical things like pinching, slugging, interfering that actually hurt or could be safety issues?

I think my exact response might differ depending on the nature of the issue, but at a minimum, I'd likely have a talk with the coach explaining the effect on my son's competition focus, and asking if he has ideas...

I can relate to having 'distracting' kids in class and at the meet. Coach knows, and does use tactics to keep them more in line (as do their parents), but it never works 100%.

 

[momto2js]

He isn't mean but attention seeking g and totally irritating. Trying his best to push the other kids and coaches buttons. He spent an exceptional amount of time in the waiting room, because he has been asked to leave practice or climbing ropes, but at the meet there just isn't any getting away from him. Usually he goes from one kid to another to see which one he can get mad first. But when there 8s just the two of them the "attempts" are not as spread out. It isn't mean, just totally irritating and a bit unsafe (things like getting in the way when kids are doing routines)

 

[munchkin3]

He isn't mean but attention seeking g and totally irritating. Trying his best to push the other kids and coaches buttons. He spent an exceptional amount of time in the waiting room, because he has been asked to leave practice or climbing ropes, but at the meet there just isn't any getting away from him. Usually he goes from one kid to another to see which one he can get mad first. But when there 8s just the two of them the "attempts" are not as spread out. It isn't mean, just totally irritating and a bit unsafe (things like getting in the way when kids are doing routines)

Oh gosh!!!!!! I know that kid!!!!!
I used to make it a point to invite him over, and make my son play with him.......I really thought he was a smart sweet young man......just very misunderstood.......a lot of people thought he was a huge pain and the boy himself knew too......
I used to cringe when I heard his mom scold him.....boy he would get it sooooo bad......I wanted to hug him.

 

[Madden3]

Isn't getting in the way of other kids routines more than a little unsafe? I would certainly talk to the coach.
I also sympathize with the children who appear to not have the maturity to be disciplined enough for gymnastics, who are clearly unable to handle the long practices, long meets, or the pressure. But when their behavior is a regular distraction or even potentially dangerous, that is a real problem.

 

[Madden3]

Of course, it is also a good idea to help your child come up with strategies for handling this stuff without losing his focus or his cool, and the coach could also be having a conversation like that with your son. Also maybe when it is just the two boys with one coach, the behavior will be less.