Parents Party Invites....

[Ex member]

My 6 year old dd was giving a party invitation today from one of her friends and as luck would have it, it is on the same day as her competition ( this is a biggish comp against other gyms in the region), the time of the party is 12-2 and the comp starts at 1pm. She is going to have to turn the party down, it's a shame as she doesn't get many party invites - not many children had parties in her class this year.

Any one else had to go through this?

 

[bogwoppit]

Oh so many times over the years. Planning family travel to avoid comp season and birthday parties/school dances/sleepovers where always complicated.

 

[HappyMom]

I know that makes DD a bit sad. Could you schedule a playdate or get together with this child where your DD could give her a birthday present? That way your DD would feel like she got to help her friend celebrate?

My DD just started rec class this year, so we haven't had this experience yet. I know it's coming though (team tryouts are this weekend...she was asked to tryout.)

 

[Flossyduck]

All the time, sadly. DD has missed so many birthday parties for training. I always offer her the choice. She usually chooses training if she has a comp coming up. However her best friend's party meant she would have to miss taking part in the gym Christmas display and she chose to go to the party. She figured the Christmas display wasn't too important and it meant that when they were practicing their group routine, she got one on one sessions with her coach AND got to go to the party. Result! I still had to go and serve drinks at the display though!!

 

[gymmiemom]

All the time! My 7 year old has missed tons of b-day parties, sleepovers and after school functions. She always chooses the gym over parties of any sort. It doesn't bother her though. Next week her teacher is throwing an end of the year celebration for their class where they get to eat pizza, do a scavenger hunt through the school, and basically just get to have run of the whole place after hours. I pretty much told DD that she was going even though she would have to miss practice. I worry that she is missing out on being a normal kid She has not missed one practice since August, so I convinced her it would be fine this one time. If it was a meet or if we had a meet coming up I wouldn't have even questioned letting her skip the party to go to gym.

 

[skschlag]

D has gotten to the point that he comes up with an invitation chanting "Please don't let there be a meet, please don't let there be a meet." It always seems that for the whole weekend, the party is at the time of his competition. Hard to say, but he has gotten used to it.

 

[HappyMom]

I worry that she is missing out on being a normal kid

That's my concern right now...as my DD has been bitten HARD by the gymnastics bug...and I know that she'll be continuing and moving into the competitive side. DD will do gymnastics anywhere and everywhere. I mean...we met up with some of her friends/their parents (ie my friends too) that we hadn't seen in a while for a playdate at a playground last weekend. She spent 3/4 of the time on the chin up bars on the playground (you know they ones I mean) doing/"practicing" her chin up pullovers, back hip circles, mill circles, etc. I finally told her to "GO PLAY" with your friends! That consisted of going to the grassy area and doing handstands, cartwheels, hand stands to bridges, hand stands to forward rolls, bridge kickovers, etc. She's only been in a rec class for 7 months...but she's addicted.

From what I'm learning on CB, it's a very fine balancing act between gymnastics and "normal" life.

I hope your DD isn't too disappointed, Tiny Dancer. Schedule that playdate, so DD still gets to spend time with her friend!

 

[Gymmom495]

It's the nature of the beast.


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[Gymmommy71]

My DD has had to miss parties for meets and competitions more times than I can count over the years, it's unfortunate, but it comes w/ the territory of being in a competitive sport. I always make sure that she attends the parties that she can make it to though, even if they are logistically inconvenient (i.e. require some rushing around), so people know she can and will come to parties when she can. Sorry your DD has to miss the party, that's rough at age 6 :/.

 

[cbifoja]

It's par for the course in gymnastics. My daughter had missed a ton of stuff: parties, sporting events, family get togethers, etc. She even had a meet on her own birthday which meant the day was about the meet, not her birth.

I never get the "normal childhood" sentiment. What is normal, anyway? I guess I feel that as long as my child gets to attend some parties and some events...and that she has one or two nights/days a week to fun around the neighborhood....that fits into my definition of normal.

I always struggle with biting my tongue when I hear of our teenage gymnasts being forced to quit because their parents want them to have a "normal high school experience." As a high school educator, I cringe at what often means: parties, under age drinking, sexual experimentation, sometimes drugs. This "normal" is the normal that I am hoping gymnastics prevents her from having!

Kids with too much free time can find a lot of ways to fill that time.

 

[Ex member]

Thanks for the replies, my dd has a disco at school next week and she can attend that one, I will check and see what time the comp starts as I was guessing at 1pm, it might be later, if it is 1pm I will ask if dd can go round her friends a little earlier on the day of the party so she can spend time with her before she goes to the comp.

 

[shelovestoflip]

It's par for the course in gymnastics. My daughter had missed a ton of stuff: parties, sporting events, family get togethers, etc. She even had a meet on her own birthday which meant the day was about the meet, not her birth.

I never get the "normal childhood" sentiment. What is normal, anyway? I guess I feel that as long as my child gets to attend some parties and some events...and that she has one or two nights/days a week to fun around the neighborhood....that fits into my definition of normal.

I always struggle with biting my tongue when I hear of our teenage gymnasts being forced to quit because their parents want them to have a "normal high school experience." As a high school educator, I cringe at what often means: parties, under age drinking, sexual experimentation, sometimes drugs. This "normal" is the normal that I am hoping gymnastics prevents her from having!

Kids with too much free time can find a lot of ways to fill that time.

My daughter will enter HS this fall.....frankly, I am happy that she is at the gym 20 some odd hours a week....she really has no time for the 'new normal' of HS!!

I think she is happy about that, too! This year, she went to one 8th grade dance (they have them just about monthly) and she really didn't like it. She likes the kids individually but get them all in a large, darkish room and crazy things happen. She realizes she's not ready for the crazy!

It seems that the Optional girls don't have time for much...though she skips for special things and I'm fine with that!

 

[my4buffaloes]

Both of my dd's have missed many birthdays due to gymnastics. Just recently my younger dd who doesn't compete yet got an invite to her best friend's party - the exact same time as practice. I asked her what she wanted to do and she said gymnastics! I had to talk to her about how she goes to gym practice 3 times a week all year and her best friend's party only comes once a year and she should go to that. She rarely misses gym and since not competing yet I figured it was ok this time.

 

[gymmom1974]

I think all gymnasts have this dilemma....and there's not much you can do if he/she wants to be competitive. That is why teammates are referred to lovingly as "gymsisters": they truly become more than just friends and teammates.

 

[erindel]

Yup alot.. we have been doing that for the last five yrs. She doesnt even think of going to the party now. Sadly kids know about her gymnastics so she doesn't get invited anywhere now. The price to pay when they go competitive and practice so many hours.

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[GymnastMomX2]

All the time

 

[OzZee]

As everyone has said that's the way it goes.
I'm pretty strict on the you have chosen to do this, you and the rest of the family are sacrificing for this so therefore you do what you have chosen.
Though saying that if it's for normal training time and they can do a makeup (we are very lucky with our clubs/sports mostly that there is an extra session to choose, though not with dance) and it suits the family then that's fine.
If it's a best friend we will look at it (though really all best friends know that Sunday is the only opportunity and to check for a competition weekend) . '
The kids are great about this and when things can be worked around so happy.
Also because the gym (etc etc) is the first priority for them I love it when they are able to join into something else.
I love my kids having as well rounded upbringing as possible.

 

[skschlag]

I think, when talking about "normal" childhood, you have to think about what is normal. As long as your child is having the childhood they are wanting, then it is normal. If they are doing what they love, with their friends, and having fun, then that is normal.

D has missed tons of birthdays. It has been sad, but he makes that choice. Gym is where he wants to be. So I think as long as it is the child's choice, and not the parents, it is good and "normal!"

 

[cbifoja]

SKschlag makes a very good point. If you're just playing the numbers, "normal" is spending hours in front of some sort of screen! I don't think ANY of us what that kind of normal childhood for our active gymmies.

 

[tooootsie]

It stinks for kids sometimes... but it also shows their dedication. They are at 6 willing to miss birthday parties... for the love of the sport