Hello - And Uh Oh, I think I made a mistake!

[NewtoGym]

Hi all,
I am new to CB and new to gymnastics as well. My 6-year-old is on a level 2 preteam and today after practice I asked her coach when she would move up to level 3. She had only been there a month or so, but her skill set has improved so much and she is one of the oldest in the group. She seems to be one of the strongest. After i asked the question I instantly felt like that was not the best thing to do. I don't want to be a pushy parent and felt really stupid after asking. The coach thought a bit and then said she still needed to improve on beam. I understand that. No problem. My question for everyone here, is it ok to ask a coach when your daughter can move up, or do you wait. I am trying to figure it all out and just don't know the way yet! lol. Thanks everyone!

 

[Kiwi]

I think it should be fine to ask these kind of questions of the coach, but it depends on the way you ask. I think there is a difference between asking in a 'pushy' way and asking in a 'non-pushy' way!

 

[bogwoppit]

Welcome to the CHalkbucket and to gymnastics.

It should be okay to ask any question of your coach. But often it feels like it isn't, they have to deal with all kinds of parents and often this makes them guarded.

I find a better way might be to say, "I am still learning about the gym stuff, what skills do the girls learn at this level, and what skills do they need to move to the next?". Coaches are often happy to help educate you, especially when they feel you aren't pushing too much.

Of course the more you learn, the more questions you have!!

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Hi all,
I am new to CB and new to gymnastics as well. My 6-year-old is on a level 2 preteam and today after practice I asked her coach when she would move up to level 3. She had only been there a month or so, but her skill set has improved so much and she is one of the oldest in the group. She seems to be one of the strongest. After i asked the question I instantly felt like that was not the best thing to do. I don't want to be a pushy parent and felt really stupid after asking. The coach thought a bit and then said she still needed to improve on beam. I understand that. No problem. My question for everyone here, is it ok to ask a coach when your daughter can move up, or do you wait. I am trying to figure it all out and just don't know the way yet! lol. Thanks everyone!

approx 60% of 'new kids' quit in the 1st 6 months. you've been there "a month or so". so maybe you wait to ask those kinds of questions until after 6 months has gone by.

 

[Coacharella]

60% , wow, that is a high number!

I think since the coach knows you are new too, asking that question most likely was not percieved as "pushy". It's all in the approach.

Good luck to your daughter

 

[cathiann]

I think it's just fine to ask the coach questions--I probably would have worded it slightly different--like "XX is really loving gymnastics. What skills does she need before she is ready to move up to level 3?"

 

[gym law mom]

On a scale of 1-10 of parent bloopers this only rates about 2. Its ok to ask the coach how your dd is doing---I probably wouldn't have brought up moving up after the 1st month. If she's only in class 1 or 2x/week, the coach is just barely getting to know her and see what her strengths and weaknesses are. Basically like the 1st month of school.

Don't feel though that you can't ask a question at the gym if something comes up that you don't understand or has dd upset.

 

[bluesocks]

Okay wise parents, how would I word this question....

Move ups happen in our gym in January and July. My schedule changes each January and August. So, right now I am preparing my schedule for January. If she changes classes, her practice nights change. It would be very helpful to know if there is a good chace she will change as I can make my schedule now to suit that better. But, once I make my schedule, I can't change it. So....how to ask the same type of question without sounding pushy and knowing it is still three more months until decisions will be made?

Not to hijack the thread, but pretty much the same question!

Blue

 

[bogwoppit]

Say to the coach exactly what you said to us! I always have the same issue in summer, so I email the coach and say we are making our fall work schedule, can you let me know what Baby Bogs training days and times will be. She obliges.

The worst thing they can say is, I don't know.

THe bigger question is....are we really wise parents! LOL

 

[Blazing15]

They are actually probably used to being asked that since a lot of parents have to rearrange their work schedule. We start testing in January and find out in June if our daughter moves up and it's hard not knowing what her schedule would be so that we can rearrange work. One of the moms I think already switched her schedule so she says her daughter better move up. LOL. You can always ask and see what they say. Hopefully you can find out sooner rather than later.

 

[NewtoGym]

I guess I didn't really give you all the info. My daughter has actually been doing gym for almost a year. She was in a rec class at another gym with the same coach she has now. My daughter loves her. So when the coach moved to our current gym, we went as well. She was asked to be on the pre-team 2 hours twice a week. She has been doing that for only a month, but the coach has known her longer. She has suddenly really improved in this new program. A different little girl who is very flexible and quite good in some areas was moved up at the last practice and that is when I asked when my daughter would move up since she can do almost everything the other girl can do. The only thing being she is not quite as flexible (that I can see). She is working on it though and just so excited. She really wants to be at the gym everyday and level 3 is there 3 times a week so that is a big incentive for her. Thank you everyone for your advice and thoughts. This is a whole new world for me and am so excited for my little one. What an interesting sport!

 

[jdf]

I think coaches should offer conferences a few times a year just like school teachers do. Even skip a few nights of practice to schedule them. Parents want feedback, and shouldn't have to walk on eggshells when it comes to approaching the coach. If the coach doesn't know yet if the child will move up, tell them when a decision will be made. Maybe that way the coaches will be able to feel prepared to talk and not feel ambushed.

 

[cher062]

Parents should feel comfotable asking any question at any time and not need to "wait" for any question. You are new and you just wanted to know. Just let the coach know that you are just wondering how long they stay usually at a given level and the coach should understand you are new and need this info. Maybe even suggest to the coach they might want a new parent meeting to answer these types of FAQ's. I'm sure your not the only one asking these.

 

[Ingwe]

Parents should feel comfotable asking any question at any time and not need to "wait" for any question

I am really stressing over this right now. My DD is going through something and I really want to talk to her coach about it but I know that as soon as I do I am going to regret it. I hate that I feel like I am intruding when I ask a question.

The other thing that has me concerned is that the coach screamed at my DD at practice on Saturday for "talking" back. According to my Dd and 2 other girls, she in no way was disrepectful to this coach.
What happened was, they were doing cross tumbling and Morgan was adding an extra step in. The coach told her she needed to work her steps out and all Morgan said was, I know, but when I do it in my routine I always do the steps right. I don't know why I keep doing it during cross tumbling. At that point the coach screamed at her about talking back and from now on the only answer she wants to hear from my Dd is Yes M'am.
This incident has added on to the other thing and I really don't know what to do.

 

[bogwoppit]

I suppose it depends how much you like paying someone to yell at your kid in public.

AS much as you do not want to have the talk, how bad will you feel for not stepping in?

That sucks!

 

[Deleted member D3987]

I am really stressing over this right now. My DD is going through something and I really want to talk to her coach about it but I know that as soon as I do I am going to regret it. I hate that I feel like I am intruding when I ask a question.

The other thing that has me concerned is that the coach screamed at my DD at practice on Saturday for "talking" back. According to my Dd and 2 other girls, she in no way was disrepectful to this coach.
What happened was, they were doing cross tumbling and Morgan was adding an extra step in. The coach told her she needed to work her steps out and all Morgan said was, I know, but when I do it in my routine I always do the steps right. I don't know why I keep doing it during cross tumbling. At that point the coach screamed at her about talking back and from now on the only answer she wants to hear from my Dd is Yes M'am.
This incident has added on to the other thing and I really don't know what to do.

different perspective from me on a common problem.

it doesn't matter that she/dd thinks she gets her steps right when the "routine" takes place. she probably has made the same mistake without consequence and without the coach noticing the said mistake each time. as the coach has at least recognized the problem is where your child must pay attention closely to what the coach says and what she herself performs. as the kids get faster and stronger, those steps become as important as a skill cushion is to a dismount. same goes for vault. as the kids difficulty progresses along with strength and speed, mis-steps could find your child landing out of bounds or on their head. or seriously crashing on vault if the same mis-steps take place. this problem DOES have a potential for serious injury if not corrected.

now, it seems to me that the coach may not be certain or understand how to make this happen. the coach could be afraid to make the necessary adjustments because he/she is not certain about what they're looking at or why it's happening. sometimes you literally have to 'walk' the kids thru this problem and solution.

furthermore, at some point, the athlete has to be mature enough to talk to the coach about problems such as this. and though you may not agree, sometimes the athlete must withstand the immaturity/impatience of the coach to come to a solution. this too is a common problem. i'm NOT saying that this is acceptable but it happens.

bottom line, and for your child's safety, she must engage the coach to find the solution to this problem on her own. if your child is not satisfied, then you intervene. not until. this problem must be addressed by the coach and a solution found for the safety of your child. in this instance, communication is paramount to their coach/athlete relationship and how they will communicate with each other in the future and when the stress and pressure is on at competitions where decisions must be made in the blink of an eye...like decisions in regard to these mis-steps.

 

[Ingwe]

I get why she was correcting her about her steps (I guess she was stutter stepping) I just didn't understand the need to scream (when I say scream, she screamed) about her back talking. I am the 1st to admit when my kid does something wrong but from what I hear she was not even close to being disrespectful. I really feel the screaming was actually due to the fact that she is upset about Morgan not doing her Yuerchenko yet. She had a BAD week at practice and actually regressed from doing it with a spot to not doing it at all now. I know the coaches are mad at her about it.
They didn't come out and say they were mad, but it was evident on how she was treated. For example, being told to leave vault and go do bars because its obvious that you really don't want to go to Level 8.

Morgan doesn't want me to say anything at all. She said she will work it all out. I still have my reservations about what's been going on though and will just see how this week goes.

I appreciate the opportunity to vent here though

 

[Deleted member D3987]

now you have brought yurchenkos in to the discussion in concert with "stutter steps". honestly, this problem must get resolved. keep venting!

p.s.: by chance is their a coach at your gym named tiffany? she is in law school??

 

[Ingwe]

Sorry,
I am confusing everyone

The week started off (I should say its been the past month) with the issue with the Yurchenko. She is having a lot of issues with it and that is keeping her from moving to L8. She was doing them with a spot then suddenly on Wednesday she wouldn't even do it while being spotted. This then turned into a problem with the coaches etc.

Then on Saturday the got screamed at for back talking while being corrected for stutter stepping while cross tumbling. The screaming thing is what bothered me. For the record, morgan is not the kid who comes home and tells me anything that happens at Gym, so when she does tell me anything or complain that means that it really upset her. She has a thick skin and doesn't get upset very easily.

I had been thinking about talking to the coaches about her regression on the vault, then the screaming thing happened. I feel, that was in part due to the coach being frustrated with her lack of willingness to do this vault. Then she goes to floor and starts this stutter stepping thing and then the coach just lost it.
Okay, did that make more sense?

Dunno,
No, her name is not Tiffany.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

let me clarify. the problem may have to do with the running steps at vault and tumbling. there is a translation and crossover. one could be causing the other. understand??