Parents help orient a new family to gymnastics, please

[Neveranathlete]

We are a family of 7. DH has 2 teens from previous marriage. We have 3 littles ones together (DS8, DD4, DD2). DD4 started gymnastics last year at 3. She has quickly progressed to working in the 6-7 year old class. We are at a satellite location of a USAG gym. The coaches are very excited about DD4 and they love to work with her and teach her new skills as she learns them very quickly. They also tell me that she has exceptional strength and focus. They would like her to go onto the pre team at their main location. But I am reluctant. Here are the issues: the main location is far. If she is going to actually be on a team, it's got to be closer to us. Which means that we would have to switch gyms. I'm ok with that, DOWN THE ROAD. All of this is completely new and confusing to me (and DH) as neither one of us have any experience with gymnastics. (Though DH's son has exceptional talent in another sport and has placed nationally, he didn't start in that particular sport until he was much older.) Four years old seems VERY young to me to even think about being on a team. But the coaches are very excited about her talent and drive and want to see her move ahead. I'd like to just keep her at this gym for at least another year or 2 and THEN start thinking about moving to another gym or being on a team. What do you experienced parents think? Would there be any "harm" to waiting another 1-2 years before putting her on a team (if she is still capable and interested)?

 

[Azgymmiemom]

No harm in waiting. She might decide she likes dance or soccer in a year or so. She's only 4. Usag rules, she can't compete the first required level(4) until she is 7, anyway. The higher they go in the levels, the longer the practices and the more wear and tear on their little bodies. You are a good mommy to be cautious!!
My dd didn't set foot in a gym until she was the ancient age of 6. She competed last season at level 8 and hoping to do both 8 & some 9 this year. She's been in the gym almost 6 years. It's been a nice steady increase and she still loves gym.
That's the most important thing.
Welcome to the Chalkbucket!!

 

[Midwestmommy]

Put some duct tape around your pocketbook and RUN!!! Just kidding. Enjoy the ride, it's a fun sport. Make sure your kid is with the right coaches and gym (sounds like you are already thinking about that). Yes there are crazy gym parents (and maybe one in all of us on occasion), but you will meet some fun friends of your own if your daughter stays in the sport. Once your daughter is a little older, try to nurture your and her friendships outside of the gym (find a good coffee shop) and let the coaches do the gym stuff.

 

[Ali'sMom]

No harm in waiting.
Let her have fun right now

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

No harm in waiting another year and seeing where this goes. She's 4. There are tons of things that aren't developmentally appropriate for her to even begin working on yet.... If she shows the same drive at 5 1/2, get her to a preteam program.

 

[Neveranathlete]

No harm in waiting another year and seeing where this goes. She's 4. There are tons of things that aren't developmentally appropriate for her to even begin working on yet.... If she shows the same drive at 5 1/2, get her to a preteam program.

Thank you for the feedback! Can you share with me what is not developmentally appropriate for her to work on? She is in a class with kids who are 2-3 years older and I want to make sure that she is not doing something that she shouldn't be working on. (Or should I just trust the coaches that they know what to do?)

 

[Neveranathlete]

Thanks for all the responses! You have verified that my gut was correct. I appreciate your replies. I'm sure I'll be back for more questions!

 

[Iwannabemargo]

backbends and bridges are particularly discouraged before 5, if you search on here you will find many threads on that subject.

 

[sce]

Thank you for the feedback! Can you share with me what is not developmentally appropriate for her to work on? She is in a class with kids who are 2-3 years older and I want to make sure that she is not doing something that she shouldn't be working on. (Or should I just trust the coaches that they know what to do?)

Yes and no. We can't always second guess the coaches, but there has been so newer learning that not all coaches know or buy into. First though, you are her Mom and are looking out for your child in and out of the gym. 4yo is very young to get serious about anything. Second, as Iwannbemargo pointed out arching skills at a young age are very dangerous. So her being in a class with older kids could mean she's doing skills her body is not developmentally ready for.

 

[MeetDirector]

Never -

You said that your family is new to this sport, so here are some things that I wish we had known when our dd was 4yo (she is now almost 18 and a level 10).

- This sport is not for the weak of wallet. The further you go, the more it costs (tuition, competition gear, travel, etc). We easily spent over $10K last year.
- This sport will demand more and more of your time but by the time you realize how much time you are spending it will be too late (the old frog in a pot of water thing). By the time she gets to the higher optional levels she will easily be spending 20 hours a week at the gym. And if she can't drive herself it will take a parent to get her there and back.
- This sport produces extremely dedicated young adults. Parents have to help keep things in focus. School has to come first since there isn't a career as a professional gymnast.
- You have to get to a point of trusting her coaches. You may have to make gym changes that will facilitate building the trust. It happens especially when good compulsory coaches don't translate into good optional coaches.
- There is a whole new language to learn; it takes time and it is OK sometimes to call a skill "that flippy thing" if you don't remember the russian name of the skill.
- This sport has to be your daughter's sport; she has to have the passion; she has to be the one motivating herself. Parents can't do that for their athlete. She has to find her way of working through the tough skills later in her career (and they are tough and will cause you to hold your breath).
- With 6 other people in the family to think about, your challenge will be to balance everything; it will be a challenge.
- Figure out a way to communicate with her coaches; open lines of communication are the key to success.

Good Luck

 

[iwannacoach]

Hold out and keep things as they now for as long as you can. I doubt there's anything she'll learn in a year or two of pre-team that can't be learnt in 3-4 months as a seven year old.

Always keep her in a state of wanting more.... never in a state of wishing she had less.

 

[CanAmGymMum]

My daughter was invited to move to preteam when she was 4. I politely declined letting the head coach/owner know that I didn't feel she was ready yet, but we were definitely interested. She started preteam when she was 5. Now, at 9 years old, she's doing great and I don't believe she'd be any further along had she started a year earlier.

Just make sure you communicate with the coaches so they know what your thought process is and to make sure you're on the same page. Hopefully, they will understand. Good luck. Your daughter has chosen a very demanding and equally rewarding sport.

 

[SignHere]

Try to find out if this is a " one off" invitation. Some gyms are extremely serious about team. They only start team at a certain age!

 

[wgymmom]

No harm in waiting at 4. But it is very good that you're paying attention now. I waited too long!

 

[IreneKa]

Agree with others that yes, it's okay to wait another year at 4. But definitely let them know you are interested. If they assume you are not interested at all, they might not offer again. And don't wait too long. There are many of us here who wish our children would have started sooner.

 

[gymmomtoo]

I'd ask the gym if it's okay waiting a year too--some gyms decide early and if you pass it up now, they may not offer again (not a philosophy I agree with, btw, but want to be sure her daughter doesn't miss the chance, if this is what she likes).

 

[HoldThePhone]

I think you have to do what is right for your daughter and family. Most 4 year old aren't ready for a team path, but there are exceptions, even still that doesn't mean it's going to be the right choice. My DD started at 4, and I wouldn't change that, looking back. She was an only child, we had the resources, and she couldn't get enough, still can't really. She thrived being in the team environment, and has grown so much as a person and gymnast over the last couple of years. Sure, your daughter could wait, and be fine in starting in a year, but if you guys are able to manage it, and it's something she thinks she wants, I don't see the harm in exploring it as an option, either.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Never -

You said that your family is new to this sport, so here are some things that I wish we had known when our dd was 4yo (she is now almost 18 and a level 10).

- This sport is not for the weak of wallet. The further you go, the more it costs (tuition, competition gear, travel, etc). We easily spent over $10K last year.
- This sport will demand more and more of your time but by the time you realize how much time you are spending it will be too late (the old frog in a pot of water thing). By the time she gets to the higher optional levels she will easily be spending 20 hours a week at the gym. And if she can't drive herself it will take a parent to get her there and back.
- This sport produces extremely dedicated young adults. Parents have to help keep things in focus. School has to come first since there isn't a career as a professional gymnast.
- You have to get to a point of trusting her coaches. You may have to make gym changes that will facilitate building the trust. It happens especially when good compulsory coaches don't translate into good optional coaches.
- There is a whole new language to learn; it takes time and it is OK sometimes to call a skill "that flippy thing" if you don't remember the russian name of the skill.
- This sport has to be your daughter's sport; she has to have the passion; she has to be the one motivating herself. Parents can't do that for their athlete. She has to find her way of working through the tough skills later in her career (and they are tough and will cause you to hold your breath).
- With 6 other people in the family to think about, your challenge will be to balance everything; it will be a challenge.
- Figure out a way to communicate with her coaches; open lines of communication are the key to success.

Good Luck

spot on and spoken like an experienced veteran!

 

[MeetDirector]

I am honored dunno - thank you.

As we are about to begin our final season this weekend with a trip to the Bay area, I look back on these last 14 years. It has been quite a ride! We have one absolutely amazing daughter that has suceeded in this very difficult sport and suceeded in her academic career. High-level academics and high-level gymnastics can be done, but it takes effort in both areas.

Yes there are things that I wish we had known when she was on training/pre-team, but I must say I would do it all over again.

 

[txgymfan]

Meet director, will she be continuing gym in College? I can't remember if you posted if she got a scholarship, considering a club or moving on.