WAG Horrible first L6 meet

[sportzmomov3]

Didn't care for level 6. That said, I would keep videotaping EVERY meet. Even the ones where she only does 1 or 2 events. Why? Not because you are CGM and will review and take notes or go over it with her. Because as much time as these girls spend in the gym practicing their sport, there are few opportunities they get to showcase what they've been working so hard on. The memories are priceless, and the tape will reinforce that even from one meet to the next, improvement and growth is happening - whether you look at it afterwards or not. My DD will occasionally go into the video file on our computer and open up her compulsory meets - just for kicks and giggles. Her self assessments are always amusing. As for talking about a bad meet, your DD is at the age where a bad meet can be emotionally challenging - for her and for you! I would actually suggest not even saying something generically positive first - let her make the first comment. Just smile and give her a hug and see what she says. If she says nothing, take the hint - and accordingly, ask what ice cream shop you should hit on the way home. They all know whether they did "well" or not - and the perspective is uniquely theirs - based on what they did that week during practice, how they felt during the meet, etc. etc. The last thing pre-teens or tweeners want is to talk about the obvious. Hang in there!

 

[beamer]

I like the idea of letting you dd "have" her own gymnastics experience, but don't fall in line with the idea that you need to "keep your mouth shut" to accomplish that. Your stress from the first meet isn't that your dd did poorly, but rather that her meet didn't go well for her. There's nothing wrong with feeling bad about her meet as long as you're feeling bad about how she had to absorb the feelings she had after bars and beam. There's a lot of drama that goes into a "first meet", and a couple of falls can really send a kid reeling, so you had, and did, tread lightly.....good job.

The problem you need to help her with is her form. Her coaches can only do so much with reminders, but it's up to her to embrace the notions that she's capable of good form, can raise her scores by making it a priority, but most of all.....can have so much more success and consistency with her skills by doing them with good form.

Most kids, parents, and even some coaches see good form as an entity, in and of itself, that raises scores by eliminating deductions for bent knees, flexed toes, arched backs, and the bent elbows caused by arching. What's missing is an appreciation for the simplicity of movement that good form brings to the gymnasts efforts.

It works like this.......

The kids learn skills through a process that usually ends in lots of repetition to refine the skill and to build consistency through muscle memory. Most of us only have a certain capacity to remember things, as there's a limit to how much we can ask of our selves, and the same is true of our muscles. The challenge imposed by poor form is that a variable is introduced by every deviation from straight legs, pointed toes, tight core positions, correct head positions, and straight arms. That means that poor form requires a kid to learn how to move through a clear hip that accomodates a different distribution and placement of body mass, and that child will have to learn many variations of the skill.....one for slightly bent legs, one for severely bent legs, another for bent legs with an arched back, with bent arms, with legs flopping around, head sticking out...........It can get to the point where a child can only attempt the skill and hope for the best because they simply don't have the mental and/or physical capacity to learn fifteen different versions of a clear hip.

The only way out of this dilemma is for the kids to buy into the concept that form, while adding to their task, will simplify the task in a significant way and make it so much easier to learn and have fun with skills that suddenly become easy to do. It's really that simple. Good form and body positions allow the kids to concentrate their learning on skills that offer the same challenge each time, rather than the fifteen variable challenges created by form and position deviations.

I don't know how you can frame the concept for your dd, but here's how one mommy did it. She constanly put things her dd used in different places, making even the simple task of getting a cup for water a burden, and she changed it every day for several days. Her dd got upset with her mother after 3-4 days and told her to stop changing things around so she could count on things being where they were supposed to be. Mom changed things back to the way they were and a couple of days later had a fun chat with her dd about what the whole experience was about, and related it to how consistency makes things easier....even if it took a couple of hours to put things back in order.

So while you should "keep your mouth shut" about her "bad meet", you could think about the form/consistency/burden conundrum, and find a way to help your dd come to the reality that she's spending a whole lot of gymnastics bucks and not getting what she wants for "her money".

I agree wholeheartedly iwannacoach.

I'm just not sure she is going to "get it". Here is an anecdote that illustrates the problem.

In mentioning the video incident previously I didn't mention the one interesting exchange (because I'm too wordy as it is!) that came out of it. We were watching her floor routine.

She was watching the end of the routine and noticed (on her own, no prompting from me, I swear!) her bent legs on the back walkover that precedes the floor dismount. She said, "I thought about having straight legs on that, but then I knew the roundoff backhandspring back tuck was coming up."

I looked at her (trying really hard not to pull out my hair) and said, "Huh? Would having straight legs on the walkover affect your performance on the final pass?"

She nodded her head yes.

Yikes!

I have now been inside the mind of the form-challenged gymnast. By the time this thing is done, I will be the Chalkbucket expert on form issues!

 

[iwannacoach]

I looked at her (trying really hard not to pull out my hair) and said, "Huh? Would having straight legs on the walkover affect your performance on the final pass?"

She nodded her head yes.

Yikes!

I have now been inside the mind of the form-challenged gymnast. By the time this thing is done, I will be the Chalkbucket expert on form issues!

Just be gratefull after your journey into the convoluted mind of the form challenged gymnast, that you came out alive!

Your dd is a common and fair example of why gymnastics is sooooo difficult when it should be relatively easy up to and through L7.

Geez! I guess it's true that you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make her drink.

 

[wallinbl]

She was watching the end of the routine and noticed (on her own, no prompting from me, I swear!) her bent legs on the back walkover that precedes the floor dismount. She said, "I thought about having straight legs on that, but then I knew the roundoff backhandspring back tuck was coming up."

I looked at her (trying really hard not to pull out my hair) and said, "Huh? Would having straight legs on the walkover affect your performance on the final pass?"

She nodded her head yes.

DD's HC tells her all the time that it's better to try to do the skill the right way and fall/fail than to skimp in some way that gets you through it. If the girls go for it and don't make it, he's happy. If they do a weak element because they're trying to not screw up, he's mad. Sometimes this hurts us at meets when we watch girls from other gyms do deduction avoidance routines and get better scores, but it'll probably work out in the long run, and the girls feel better about really going for it when they do.

 

[barsgirl]

I'm a gymnast here... and everyone else seems to be parents... but I want to say I HATE when my mom tries to coach me. I know what I did wrong and my coach tells me what I don't know. so if you have a teenage daughter (I'm 14) I would suggest not trying to be her coach.

 

[gymmomtoo]

I am late to this post (how did I not see it earlier?), but wanted to say I totally sympathize. And love Mary's post and many others. Please, please don't offer coaching suggestions. As barsgirl just said, kids usually hate having parents coach them too. My DH is notorious for coaching our youngest on her swimming (he swam in HS and college) and she HATES it (she tells me many times). I try to get him to stop, but he doesn't listen (and is alienating said DD). So PLEASE don't do it. Let her vent if she wants, offer non-technique related advice, if asked, but otherwise don't say anything. Her coaches, hopefully, are giving her tips on what to focus on--you want their voice in her head, not your voice competing for her attention.