Parents Knowing if the gymnast is ready

[Lilou]

Really? I inquired with a person who works at the old gym and they said to keep good relationships between gyms they don't like to move girls mid-season. And for sure she wouldn't be competing the rest of the season because meets are already registered for.

I'm letting my DD stay at our current gym but for now she's ok there overall. My goal is to get through the season, but I'm keeping an eye out because if she I see her mentally struggling (over time, not that one day or one week hard time) then I'll find another solution.

I respectively beg to differ. I know of girls who have left mid season. Some got to compete, some didnt. But they still got the heck out of what was an unhealthy environment.

 

[2gymkids]

So to answer your original question, we've been at gyms that do it two very different ways.

Our old gym would basically compete them no matter what, unless it was a safety issue. So when my new L4 literally lost all her bar skills, they competed her even though we weren't even sure she'd be able to get onto the bars. They would threaten to send them back a level until the first meet, but it was an empty threat(which they admitted to the parents) and really messed with the girls' heads. So they would go out, and fail....and some kids ultimately learned from that and worked their butts off to improve, and some just continued to get embarrassed and discouraged. While my daughter was the former and learned a lot of good lessons about failing and trying again and working hard, I would not recommend that system as her head is still recovering from it more than a year later.

Our current gym is much more like you're describing, but not quite as strict. They assess the girls a few weeks out to decide if there will be any scratches, but they are very clear that if it's a rough week on an event prior to the meet for whatever reason, they have the right to scratch them. As far as I know there aren't number criteria but there could be, I guess. They have also said that there may be rare times when they have a girl scratch an event at a meet based on a really bad warm-up. They are very clear that they want the child confident heading into the routine. They do also have to attend all practices prior to the meet, unless they are ill, and if that is the case it will be a judgement call as to how they're feeling, how they come back, etc. And we do have practice the night before a meet. Our last meet was 9am about an hour away, and the girls got out of practice at 8 the night before. This was also the case at our last gym.

Anyway, I don't know what the perfect medium is in terms of prepared but not perfect. I do know that a year ago, my DD thought she preferred #1 in terms of competing no matter what- scratching was a fate worse than death. Now that the perspective of the coaches has changed (if you're not ready, that's ok, keep working, everyone in their own time), she has a much healthier perspective and was glad to scratch an event at her first two meet due to fear issues. She is just as motivated to compete AA at the next meet, but isn't a wreck about the whole thing. I think SO much of it is the coach's attitude and not just specific policies.

 

[MILgymFAM]

We’ve been at gyms similar to what you describe. At my DD’s current gym there is no scratching allowed except for injury. If you’re having trouble with a particular skill they will change the routine as needed. For instance, my daughter lost her flyaway and they reconfigured a new routine without one.

 

[Flyaway]

I'm pretty sure my dd would never compete if her gym had that policy.

And I'm so grateful our gym doesn't dictate attending practice the night before a meet. Now granted, all of our meets require travel so maybe that makes a difference? Often we'll even have Friday practice canceled because the coaches have to get there too. But yeah, we're gonna leave when it works best for our family, not our gym.

 

[John]

changing mid-season. When DD moved gyms her best friend was supposed to move with her. They tried out together and were both accepted at the new gym. We were going to carpool. After states for IGC the old coach got her parents into a room and they swallowed the red pill. This morning DD best friend's parents texted me asking me if I could speak to the new gym owner about letting their DD join the gym even if just to train, no competition. They were embarrassed to send an email out of the blue. I told them I would and I'll update you on the decision.

Take away is it never hurts to ask even if you have to make sacrifices to get out of a bad environment.

 

[LGnyc]

OMG- Yes! Grass is not greener! haha I mean the old gym had its issues, and those are still there, but I think I've learned a lot ( still learning in the gym world) enough to say the old gym actually was trying to work with us and was a better fit. I just wish we could go back mid-season, but we can't from what I'm learning. No gym moves mid-season is what I'm hearing.

I think in your case, maybe it's worth a phone call. She's losing heart, you know it's not a fit, you're worried she won't last the season. Rather than having her hate gym or feeling so completely undermined, just call, ask. Even at L3 if she doesn't get to compete the rest of the season, perhaps she can be on team and practice with them. And could you please remind us on the circumstances for the move in the first place?

 

[Taxidriver]

OK as GB parent things are a bit different competition wise as far as I understand, my dd doesn’t compete the same routine at every competition elements are added or swapped depending on the competition and what suits my dd best.
So my dd might have an element removed if it has not being going well and swapped for a more reliable one or when learning new moves if they are not safe to compete they won’t be allowed to compete the move.
In the days leading up to competition they are expected to do a certain number of routines to stick and won’t move onto the next apparatus until they have but they never get threatened with not doing it at competition in the week before. Decisions on entering a competition are based on where they are at least a month before expect for injury’s or fears as they can’t be predicted in advance.

 

[LindyHopper]

The only way a gymnast scratches at our gym is if it has been deemed unsafe for her to do so.

I think your gym is a bit unreasonable. You can't expect a gymnast to go 4 for 4 six times at each of 3+ practices in the week before a meet.

We are required to be at all practices the week before a meet. If the last practice is the night before the meet, it is usually what they call a "hit & run" practice. If the last practice is the night before an 8am session it is usually cancelled for the gymnasts in that particular session.

Last season one of our girls was really sick with a fever and missed two of the practices in the week before the meet. HC was understanding and let her make up one of the practices with a different level and still let her compete at the meet. When she refused to do her BHS during the last rotation's beam warm ups, HC decided she would have to scratch beam, because it wasn't safe to let her compete the BHS. (Totally reasonable from my perspective) Her mom got really upset and pulled her daughter from our gym's program and went back to her old gym. (Not nearly as reasonable from my perspective [OP, your situation for considering going back to old gym is different and makes sense])

 

[JessSyd]

My daughter's gym doesn't charge for competitions at the start of season. It enters the girls into each competition on the closing date for entries which is usually a month or so before the competition. Girls are either invited to compete in a competition or not. If they are invited and the parents pay they are allowed to compete regardless of how the next four weeks go, and there aren't any rules about attending practice in the lead up.

At the time of invitation the coaches will speak to the girls about how they are likely to go. For example 'you look good on floor, beam and vault but your kip comes and goes so if you decide to compete, be aware that your bar score might be low'.

Some girls will take the possible low bar score and some girls will choose to wait until everything is clean. It depends on the personality of the girl and what they are in gymnastics for, and the gym respects that.

They will scratch a girl if things look dangerous though. So if they are very sick, or if something happens to a necessary skill. I have only known it to happen once in all my daughters' years at hergym and that was a bars-only scratch for a little compulsory who was amazing on floor, vault and beam but wouldn't jump between the bars and wouldn't let the coach help her with the jump or carry her to the high bar.

 

[honu]

Meets are plenty stressful enough. I can't imagine the extra stress that is added with those strict requirements. Our gym will scratch if gymnasts is injured, lacking bulk of skills needed for an event, or safety issue (new fear, bulking in warm-up at meet). Our gym has a general rule of ready on 3 events to move up and compete at a given level. We have been at two gyms and neither had requirements for hitting X number of routines the week before a meet. Falls, mistakes, missed skills are all part of the process in practice and at meets.

 

[gymgal]

Anyway, I don't know what the perfect medium is in terms of prepared but not perfect. I do know that a year ago, my DD thought she preferred #1 in terms of competing no matter what- scratching was a fate worse than death. Now that the perspective of the coaches has changed (if you're not ready, that's ok, keep working, everyone in their own time), she has a much healthier perspective and was glad to scratch an event at her first two meet due to fear issues. She is just as motivated to compete AA at the next meet, but isn't a wreck about the whole thing. I think SO much of it is the coach's attitude and not just specific policies.

I agree. Coach's intent and perspective makes all the difference. I also think there is a difference in whether the child has a fear of doing a skill or if it is just not 100% consistent just yet. If it is a fear, it is better to scratch but if it is just consistency, it may be better to let them compete the event. Unfortunately, I fear the OP's coaches are worried more about scores and gym reputation than the gymnast's best interest.

 

[amiandjim]

I agree. Coach's intent and perspective makes all the difference. I also think there is a difference in whether the child has a fear of doing a skill or if it is just not 100% consistent just yet. If it is a fear, it is better to scratch but if it is just consistency, it may be better to let them compete the event. Unfortunately, I fear the OP's coaches are worried more about scores and gym reputation than the gymnast's best interest.

I agree with what you stated at the bottom. I mean, let’s face it...level 3 bars skills are a far cry from the upper level skills that most kids develop fears on or take a while to get. The OP stated her daughter can do all the skills and missed TWO routines. To have her scratch bars just seems crazy to me.

 

[Lilou]

Thank you. It seems like she'll have to get used to some sort of "proving" the week prior that she's totally 100% ready to compete on each event. This seems to be pretty common from what I'm reading here. Since at this time, I think she needs more time to meet the gym's standards, I've scratched her entirely from our next meet so she can work hard without the pressure of a meet and be more consistent. Then we'll reassess in January. My daughter is ok with knowing she won't have to make all of those routines yet. I think it will help her mentally. This is my last effort, otherwise I'll make the call.

I think in your case, maybe it's worth a phone call. She's losing heart, you know it's not a fit, you're worried she won't last the season. Rather than having her hate gym or feeling so completely undermined, just call, ask. Even at L3 if she doesn't get to compete the rest of the season, perhaps she can be on team and practice with them. And could you please remind us on the circumstances for the move in the first place?

 

[duyetanh]

Thank you. It seems like she'll have to get used to some sort of "proving" the week prior that she's totally 100% ready to compete on each event. This seems to be pretty common from what I'm reading here. Since at this time, I think she needs more time to meet the gym's standards, I've scratched her entirely from our next meet so she can work hard without the pressure of a meet and be more consistent. Then we'll reassess in January. My daughter is ok with knowing she won't have to make all of those routines yet. I think it will help her mentally. This is my last effort, otherwise I'll make the call.

Wow. Dont take this wrong, but I am very surprised the gym let you scratch her. Usually the coaches are the ones who determine this, not the parents.

 

[MILgymFAM]

Wow. Dont take this wrong, but I am very surprised the gym let you scratch her. Usually the coaches are the ones who determine this, not the parents.

Yup. I’ve begged a coach to scratch YDD before and nope.. I’ve asked a coach to not scratch ODD.. nope. They always do what they have decided is best regardless of what my DDs or I thought. Current gym allows girls to go to (and therefore not go to) whichever meets the family chooses with the exception of states.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

If you are doing the skills safely and have met USAG move up scores you compete.

No attendance nonsense, as in missing a day the week before. Clearly if coming off an injury you need to be back long enough for coaches to feel you can compete safely.

If our gym insisted on not missing a practice, all the kids would either have no other activities or had to quit gym. It would be buh bye, enrichment stuff, music, dance, girl scouts, religion.. In fact, you can even opt out of a meet. This is one of the reasons most of us are at our gym. There is room for other things.

No specific XYZ amount of times to do something to compete it. If you can do it safely, now that clearly means doing it mostly consistently you compete. In optionals it is slightly different as you may have a skill changed right up until as you are warming up. So things thinking about our current L7 season. Your BWO-BHS not so great lately, you do BWO-BWO instead. Its not BWO-BHS or scratch. A dismount might change. Giants not so stellar lately, they come out.

 

[gymmomx2]

Wow. Dont take this wrong, but I am very surprised the gym let you scratch her. Usually the coaches are the ones who determine this, not the parents.

All she needs to do is not send her DD to a practice the week before...voila! "scratched"

 

[duyetanh]

All she needs to do is not send her DD to a practice the week before...voila! "scratched"

Lol...this is true! Ugh.

 

[Lilou]

I think the gym sees their policies are stressing my daughter out. But they're not willing to bend on them so I pretty much said if she's struggling to perform the week before with the required number of full routines on each event, then it's better we regroup mentally now for next month. I do think they're trying to work with us on this and I'm hopeful removing this pressure temporarily will help.

And yes, if we miss a practice she won't be allowed to compete anyway... lol

 

[Lilou]

This sounds very reasonable.

If you are doing the skills safely and have met USAG move up scores you compete.

No attendance nonsense, as in missing a day the week before. Clearly if coming off an injury you need to be back long enough for coaches to feel you can compete safely.

If our gym insisted on not missing a practice, all the kids would either have no other activities or had to quit gym. It would be buh bye, enrichment stuff, music, dance, girl scouts, religion.. In fact, you can even opt out of a meet. This is one of the reasons most of us are at our gym. There is room for other things.

No specific XYZ amount of times to do something to compete it. If you can do it safely, now that clearly means doing it mostly consistently you compete. In optionals it is slightly different as you may have a skill changed right up until as you are warming up. So things thinking about our current L7 season. Your BWO-BHS not so great lately, you do BWO-BWO instead. Its not BWO-BHS or scratch. A dismount might change. Giants not so stellar lately, they come out.