Parents One DS (really) hates conditioning - advice?

[Sasha]

Hi proud parents,

Looking for any similar experiences and advice on how you handled it, or what your outcome was...

So I have one DS gymmie who is a conditioning powerhouse - no external motivation required. He just loves it and lives it. Obviously, this pays off on skill acquisition, too. He also stretches on his own just to see himself make progress (crazy kid - ha). He will start competing soon.

The other DS (he's 9) has some talent for skill acquisition, and likes to "show off" when parents or coaches are watching, but the moment he thinks backs are turned, he skimps and cheats. He just isn't fond at all of conditioning (running, pushups, pullups, ab work, etc) or stretching and never does any for 'fun' like the other DS. He basically just fakes it and gets away with the minimum. We've realized that it's just not his thing.

To be honest, he is kind of a 'baby' about it sometimes - literally crying at times about pushups, and as soon as he's pushed a little past his 'easy' zone, he can be very whiny and dramatic. I am definitely NOT pushing him into gymnastics (completely OK with me if he never wants to do as much as a forward roll! lol) - but he says he *wants* to do it. We've had the "well, gymnastics is more than jumping on the trampoline - it takes hard work to get good at those skills you say you'd like to do someday - see all those pullups the level 8s are doing there? etc." To which he replies (repeatedly) that he will do the hard work - he promises - but then it's clear he really really doesn't want to when it's time.

Unfortunately, we don't have the option near us for, say, a rec trampoline class, and money is also a factor. If he was as into it as the other DS, I could justify trying to scrape together the cash (even just for rec - also conditioning-heavy here), but it just doesn't feel like this is really his thing. I'd rather 'invest' in something else he might have more potential in (doesn't even have to be a sport).

Anyone else stuck in this kind of dilemma with different kids and trying to be fair to both, but realizing one is much more of a 'fit' with the sport than another? Or have you seen conditioning 'whiners' converted after a time? I want him to be happy.

Thanks for any thoughts Peace,
S

 

[Sasha]

Reading that back it sounds so harsh about my sweet DS since I only highlighted his challenge rather than his strengths -

He's a great, helpful, loving kid with multiple talents!! I'm just struggling with whether or not the whole gymnastics scene is for him since he puts up such a fight on a key aspect of it. And if I take him out, if that seems unfair since other DS is doing it rather seriously, and I think that's a primary reason why this DS wants it, too.

ok, hope I don't sound too crazy!

 

[txgymfan]

You don't sound crazy and you have a legitimate concern. Try to expose your son to other activities and see if he likes them more.

It sounds like you really want to pull your son but it does not seem "fair". Nothing is ever fair and what is best for one child is rarely best for the other.

Could you give him a month to prove that he is willing to put in the effort? To prove to you and his coaches that he his taking this seriously? At the end of the month reevaluate the situation. If he does not show solid effort then the consequences is no more gymnastics team.

Good luck with your situation, its a tough one.

 

[kaloss]

I was in a similar situation with my girls, 5 year old picked everything up quickly and easily, 7 year old struggled majorly and would have been happy to stay home. She only did it because gymnastics was more fun than watching her sister do gymnastics for an hour. We pulled her and took some time finding something that really sparked her interest. She is doing horseback riding now... My poor wallet! She is much more geared for riding than gym! Sometimes it's not fair, but it all evens out in the end. Good luck!

 

[Iwannabemargo]

Eldest DS was great at gym, but cheated on conditioning - missed reps at beginning, middle and end. I sat him down and explained that if he didn't knuckle down as he grew he would be too heavy to do the skills required and it was as much a part of gym as the skills, he had to choose - do it all or quit. He hummed and ha'ed and then ond day had a strop and quit. That was when he was 12. He is now 15 and is starting back again whilst coaching but is now conditioning on his own as he doesn't have the strength required. Bottom line - do as the coaches say or don't but no half measures in our house

 

[Sasha]

Thanks for your own stories and advice. It's very helpful to hear what others have done with multiple children and talents, and why. We've talked with him and finally decided together that competitive gymnastics isn't going to be for him (which I really knew all along, but tried to be 'fair').

Thanks for giving me the perspective that everything doesn't have to be exactly 'fair' all the time in order to be the right thing to do

And to "kaloss" LOL on the horseback riding and your wallet! Kids pick the most expensive things, don't they?

 

[Deleted member D3987]

"shut up and work harder cause then you'll get stronger and won't complain about the conditioning...but i'm sure you'll find something else to moan about given your age after you get so strong".

 

[Flossyduck]

My DS hates the stretching. He is capable of getting much lower in splits and doing much better with all his general stretches, but he avoids the pain and stays within his comfort threshold.

He says he loves gym and he does try hard on everything else (even conditioning, which he doesn't mind so much). He's only in there while dd is training, so it makes sense for him to do it if he wants to, but there is the cost... and I can see that he's not trying with the stretching at all.

So I empathise, but for the time being anyway I am letting it go as long as he's happy and still wants to go.