WAG Setting expectations for meets (L4)

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rsm

Proud Parent
To be clear upfront, this post is more about discussing realistic expectations for DD's meets rather than having high expectations. We are in the middle of the L4 meet season, and as parents, have come to the conclusion, that our DDs are doing fantastic... given their competition. In most cases, they are competing against gyms that practice 4 to 6 hours more a week than we do. And a lot of these gyms also compete level 4 for 2 years (two gyms that we competed against at the last meet, had girls who scored 35+ at last year's state meet competing L4 again. They did not move up unless they scored 36+ in the state meet).

It took us parents a couple of meets to understand that the playing field wasn't exactly even. Which is fine, but it does change where you expect (or hope) your girls to be at the end of the meet. The younger girls who have been competing against first year L4s have been doing better generally, but they still have the disadvantage of practicing fewer hours. DD is young, and probably not ready to set goals for herself just yet, and we're just happy to see her do a little better at each meet. But you do see some disappointment, especially with the older girls, and with the team results.

I'm wondering if others in similar situations set expectations with their kids, or just leave it to "have fun and do your best" which we currently do.
 
The standard goal for my daughter has always been to do better than she did last time, fix mistakes, make it cleaner etc.
 
Sometimes dd will set her own goals for a meet. Something like stay on the beam, stick her bars landing, etc. The coaches have improving your scores, striving for personal bests, etc.

I don't think placings should be any part of the goal setting, because the competition can be so different one meet to the next. I also think it should be the athlete/coaches setting the goals, not us parents. The only thing I say is to try hard, have fun and be a good sport.
 
It is hard not to compare your DD's gym or performance to other gyms, or realize the other gym does X number of hours, or that they are doing a 2nd year in the level - but, try not to. One thing I have learned is that very little about gymnastics is fair! About the only thing a gymnast can control is their own performance, so we try not to put too much emphasis on scores or placings. Our goals are more like, stay on the beam if she had a fall at the last meet, do a higher cast, have straight legs in the beam back walkover, etc.
 
I would help her set some minor goals on each events. Honestly, I would pay attention to s ores or p,acing because they can vary widely, depending on the judges and competition. Set goals, for example, if she is bending her legs on the pullover, make her goal or bars be straight legs on the pullover. If she does that, she did a successful bar routine. Goals like sticker landings, straight arms, legs, etc.. Are small enough for her to concentrate on without being overwhelmed. Change the goals each meet. Trust me it all comes together in the end.
 
Simply by going in the meet your DD is doing great.

1. She is getting up by herself and performing for a large crowd, and people who are judging her. She must have a high level of confidence to do this.

2. She has put in a high level of discipline to even learn the routines and skills she is doing.

3. She is out in a situation whe she is being judged, scored and compared to others and not letting it devastate her or define her character. This shows strength of character.

4. In 10 years time she won't even remember what she scored at any meet. But the discipline, confidence and strength of character will define her future.
 
Like the PPs have said, we just talk about doing her personal best. Her first meet, she got 10th AA, so her 2nd meet, I challenged her to do better...... (okay, this was sneaky, because she HAD to do better, there were only 9 gymnasts in her category!).
 
Please try to emphasize to your DD that she should never focus on placement in meets, especially. Scores are harder to ignore , I know , but let me give you a reason why placement matters so LITTLE from meet to meet, and why how the age groups are formed and which gyms are at a meet can affect placement so much. DD is a level 5 and is scoring in 35's in the AA this year. Two meets ago, she scored 35.4 and placed 2nd in the AA. Last meet, she scored 35.35 and placed 10th in the AA.

'Nuff said.
 
I agree--set goals over which she has control--sticking a BHS or handstand (I can't remember what's in L4 routines, sorry!)--things like that. Smiling during her floor routine. Don't make goals on things she can't control (placing on events, scoring a certain score, bettering her score--all things that the judge and other girls can affect greatly!).

I would chat with her about goals and ask her what she wants to work on for that meet. She might surprise you about knowing what skills she is working hard at.
 
Thanks everyone for the responses. I think I will leave things as they are, because they get over disappointment pretty quickly at this stage and ice cream and cookies help with that. We haven't (and don't think we want to) set any goals for her and I don't think we focus on scores or placement very much. The placement is more obvious to the girls when some girls are on the podium and get medals or the bigger trophies, and some do not. So the girls want to be on the podium. If being on the podium was 9th place, then they would all want 9th place :rolleyes: But as long as ice cream and cookies are still a cure-all, we will be okay. Thanks again for responses.
 
Personally, I think the biggest goal of the compulsary level meets is to have fun. Fun is what will keep her energized and in the sport. The skills will come. She will improve. But the first question we always ask my DS (level6) is..did you have fun? If so...we are good!
 

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