Tired of being a gym mom!

[AlwaysCuriousMom]

VENT! I hope it's possible to feel this way and still have a successful long-term gymnast. I tired of the expense, time, frustrations... tired of that sinking feeling when DD is not invited to join a certain group, hurt, or having to tell coach she will miss practice because of XYZ. I'm hoping someone will tell me this feeling is normal, and that if I keep my DD away form my negative feelings, she still has hope for long-term success in the sport.


Because allowing her to join the basketball team sounds REALLY good right now!!

 

[Aussie_coach]

It's normal!

But like in anything in life, often the greater the sacrifice the greater the rewards. Gymnastics is a very demanding sport but it will give a lot to your DD's life in return. Gymnasts develop amazing self discipline, confidence, determination, goal setting skills, self motivation and passion in a way that very few sports do.

In this sport the athlete must face her fears everyday, she must look at that barrow ad high beam and not hesitate in making herself fly on it. These life skills will set her up to be able to do amazing things in all areas of her life as an adult.

 

[txgymfan]

So glad you can come here to vent. Please be aware that if you have continued negative feelings she WILL pick up on them. Parents (including my own) are wonderful generous and kind but as a parent it is all but impossible to hide your true feeling from your children. If they say anything or not, they will sense your feelings, how you deal with that is up to you.


Sorry, rant of my own, do not think that you can "hide" and "pretend they don't exist" your negative feelings, bad habits or legal addictions. It only leads to a culture of deception, and may cause them to lie about their feelings about uncomfortable things to you. As an adult my family is starting to deal with some very very long term deceptions and buried feelings. Its not easy to say the least.

 

[rd7]

Hi, is it possible that you're tired (period). Frustrating or hard stuff is always harder to deal with when you're tired. Anyways, hopefully the feelings will pass soon and in the meantime you could tell your DD that your are tired (instead of tired with gymnastics) as she will definitely pick up on it - if she hasn't already!

 

[gymmomof1]

Well said Aussie_coach. Alwayscuriousmom I'm with you on being tired of being a gym mom. There are days I wish Dd was in a less intensive sport but there are also those days I see her learn a valuable life lesson as she beats a fear or the joy she has at getting a new skill. She does things I could never do at her age and I am amazed at all of you gymnasts!! So hang in there and know that we here at the Cb support you

 

[Deleted member D3987]

VENT! I hope it's possible to feel this way and still have a successful long-term gymnast. I tired of the expense, time, frustrations... tired of that sinking feeling when DD is not invited to join a certain group, hurt, or having to tell coach she will miss practice because of XYZ. I'm hoping someone will tell me this feeling is normal, and that if I keep my DD away form my negative feelings, she still has hope for long-term success in the sport.

.


Because allowing her to join the basketball team sounds REALLY good right now!!

VENT! I hope it's possible to feel this way and still have a successful long term coaching career. I'm tired of the bills, time, frustrations...tired of that sinking feeling when my athletes do not place in their certain age groups after we have worked so long and hard, are injured, or having to tell my immediate family that we will miss another family get together because of the gyms XYZ's. I'm hoping someone will tell me this feeling is normal, and that if I keep my athletes away from my negative feelings, I still have hope for a long-term success as a coach in the sport.

Because allowing myself to leave gymnastics and join a normal life may be a quitters try but sounds REALLY good right now!!

 

[gasrgoose]

VENT! I hope it's possible to feel this way and still have a successful long-term gymnast. I tired of the expense, time, frustrations... tired of that sinking feeling when DD is not invited to join a certain group, hurt, or having to tell coach she will miss practice because of XYZ. I'm hoping someone will tell me this feeling is normal, and that if I keep my DD away form my negative feelings, she still has hope for long-term success in the sport.


Because allowing her to join the basketball team sounds REALLY good right now!!

Does your daughter feel the same way? It's hard when we spend so much time and money on a kids activity, but if it's not fun for her then find something else. If it's just not fun for you but your kid loves it, then celebrate that your kid is able to do something she loves. But if the expense or time are changing the quality of life for you and/or your family then it's time for a serious discussion. The first two items you mentioned are both limited resources (money & time) and sometimes force tough decisions.

On the other side if she does go to basketball, what a great story. Surely there are aren't a very many former gymnast on the basketball courts.

 

[monkeysmom]

January blues

I think it's that time of year. I feel that way at the moment at work, dance, gymnastics, and my house which needs some organizating. Short sunlight, post holiday blahs. Found out this week they are adding a little more time to one of my daughter's dance classes and another day of gymnastics (which will make it two dance, three gymnastics). She's thrilled. The normal me would feel great about the opportunity. The first week in January me is a little pooped. I'm expanding on Dunno's idea of the ruby slippers to take me away. Well I really don't have anything sparkly but I do have some red boots I can pull out.... I'll be better after the weekend....jus' need a little excercize a little fun and a little rest.... And to not even think about dance and gymnastics other than getting her there on time...with somewhat clean tights and leos...

 

[AlwaysCuriousMom]

Thanks for the encouragement! I'm sure what I'm feeling is related to the post-holiday craziness. The gym just opened after 2 weeks off and everything just hit me at once (payments due, DD's ankle hurts, time changes, etc.) Who's complaining? I'm glad there is a forum where people (other than DD) like gymnastics... because the other alternative is talking to family and friends who will say "HOW much are you paying for that??!!!?! That's how much my (insert insanely expensive car model here) cost!" LOL! Adjusting my attitude now... DD is still obliviously happy.

 

[clrmom]

On the other side if she does go to basketball, what a great story. Surely there are aren't a very many former gymnast on the basketball courts.

LOL! My son quit gymnastics to focus more on basketball. He is in his first year on the JV team in high school now.

 

[SuperGirlmlm]

Sorry, but your gymnasts WILL sense your negative feelings. I'm 13, and whether it's my coach, my mom or a random stranger, we can always sense your negative feelings.

 

[bribri514]

I think my mom was frustrated about my gymnastics. She was happy I gained so much self confidence and integrated so well and achieved so much and was happy. But she hated working two jobs to keep our family going and she hated the minimum hour drive in the snowy mountains each way to the gym. She wasn't one of those gym moms who was recording all the scores in the front row of every meet (some meets she wasn't even able to come to), she never had meetings with my coach and I still don't think she knows exactly what each level does in USAG lol! She was a supportive mom 100%, but I could still tell she didn't always love the world of competitive gymnastics. I still turned out successful and loving gym. I competed L 10 from 6th-9th grade and qualified and placed at Nationals. Her attitude affected her decision to let me not train elite though, but in retrospect it was for the best. So don't worry about that. What my mom's disconnect from gym did was let me gain ownership of my own gymnastics. I quit sophomore year after a short lived attempt to train elite and did HS gym and cheer. Senior year I went back to gymnastics though, driving myself and organizing almost everything (I had some financial support though!). I went on to a D1 college for gym and still love it. So positive things can even come from it.

The thing that concerns me though is when you say the things about your DD not getting to join certain groups or telling her coach she'll miss practice. I don't know how old she is, but I'd have her take ownership of her gymnastics. If she needs to miss, she should tell her coach, not you. If she's missing a lot of practice, you should look at whether or not she wants to be doing it. As far as certain groups, I don't quite get what you mean.

Don't let your perfectly natural and fine feelings about gymnastics (the driving, other crazy moms, the cost, the drama, etc) mask legitimate concerns (your daughter's physical and mental health). If you stop that then don't worry at all. Come here to vent whenever and know you and your DD will be just fine!

 

[Flip]

Love the basketball idea. In that sport you know exactly how your child did. Made a basket or did not. So much objectivity in this sport it is hard to gage progress. At level 4 most of the performances look the same to me. I do not know what the judges are looking for. Feeling totally normal in my opinion, but I am new to this.

 

[wallinbl]

Gymnasts develop amazing self discipline, confidence, determination, goal setting skills, self motivation and passion in a way that very few sports do.

No doubt. It takes months or years to build up to certain skills. You train hundreds of hours for meets that require ~3 minutes of actual performance. It's a sport where you can't make up for your mistakes, so you have to have the focus not to make them. Most importantly, you learn those important skills in a way that's fun.

There's a lot of practice, fees, travel, heartache, strife, etc with being a gym parent, but as long as your daughter loves it and she's happy, she's getting a lot out of it. No matter what your kids are involved with, it will cost money, result in at least occasional disappointment and hurt, and times when your schedule just doesn't fit everything you want to do. These troubles won't be alleviated by leaving gymnastics - they'll just be replaced by something else.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

preach! ^^^