Gymnast leaving from a coaches perspective

[Linsul]

We don't know the name of the gym, gymnast, or coaches in question, and the people stating facts are behind screen names. I take everything here with a grain of salt, and certainly don't want to rely on a mod to approve posting sources. There's a limit to what can be conveyed as insight on the internet is all I'm saying. Especially when it's reputations, work ethic, or sentiment on the line.

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

The mods are discussing this thread.

In the meantime, please keep things civil. This is directed equally at everybody.

 

[coachinkal]

When I read "GOTGYM" post I had a tear in my eye.

I think "GOTGYM" expressed beautifully how strong the bond between a coach and gymnast can be.

As coaches we spend a great deal of time with our gymnasts. We help the gymnast manage their fears, we encourage, we share their disappointments, we share their acheivements. We connect with the gymnasts emotionally through all of this.

When a gymnast who we have coached for many years leaves, whatever the reason, it can be very heart wrenching.

 

[txgymfan]

We don't know the name of the gym, gymnast, or coaches in question, and the people stating facts are behind screen names. I take everything here with a grain of salt, and certainly don't want to rely on a mod to approve posting sources. There's a limit to what can be conveyed as insight on the internet is all I'm saying. Especially when it's reputations, work ethic, or sentiment on the line.

Linsul, we don't know the name of the gymnast or the first gym but Dunno gave enough information that as a casual fan it was easy to figure out what gym the gymnast was going to. There are very few national team members combine that with the state the gym is in and nationality of the coaches and it was easy to figure out.

We need to be careful with the specific information posted and make sure there are not too many clues in our posts. This is a classic example of a very specific post that did not give names.

 

[ZJsMom]

To be fair, it was gotgym who posted enough information to make the gym identifiable. She's in Illinois and said it was a new gym with national team members. That was enough to narrow it down to one gym.

 

[Linsul]

Well, my professional tunnel vision strikes again! I posted earlier about that, I really don't know the stories of gyms around me so Illinois would be out of the question. I read this and saw 'coach sad about gymnast leaving'. I don't know what is enough to get me, Shaggy and Scooby in the internet mystery mobile, but if I give it long enough I'm sure I'll find out.

 

[MdGymMom01]

Well, my professional tunnel vision strikes again! I posted earlier about that, I really don't know the stories of gyms around me so Illinois would be out of the question. I read this and saw 'coach sad about gymnast leaving'. I don't know what is enough to get me, Shaggy and Scooby in the internet mystery mobile, but if I give it long enough I'm sure I'll find out.

Bawhahahahaha!!! Don't forget Velma with her inquisitive intelect, or is that you Linsul???

 

[Linsul]

Well I'm sure as heck not Daphne or Fred! I'll take Velma, she's always got the snacks to bribe with anyway

 

[txgymfan]

Linsul,

You can be my twin becasue I am Velma. It was my college summer nickname. My coworkers talked like scooby do for a week before they told me that they called me Velma behind my back. It stuck for two summers after that.

Back on topic, as a teacher, it's always a mixed bag of emotions when I say good bye and pass my students on. I want their next teachers to believe in them and work with them like I do. Espically when they are teachers that I don't know well.

 

[NotAMom]

Not to take away anything from the caring emotions, no matter the role. FWIW, I don't think being a teacher is the same as being a coach. As a teacher, every student is expected to move on based on a schedule. Coaches can develop an entirely different relationship with their athletes. In fact, in some other cultures coaches are seen as parent figures. Once committed, it was rare in the old days to have a student to leave a coach.

 

[cher062]

Well, my professional tunnel vision strikes again! I posted earlier about that, I really don't know the stories of gyms around me so Illinois would be out of the question. I read this and saw 'coach sad about gymnast leaving'. I don't know what is enough to get me, Shaggy and Scooby in the internet mystery mobile, but if I give it long enough I'm sure I'll find out.

same here. If its not right in my neighborhood and I don't know anyone at the gym I really don't know what is going on at the gyms. I have no clue what gym it is and in Illinois no way. You would have to be in that area to even get a glimmer of what gym I think. I'm lucky to know the ones my DD competes against. Took me 3 years to even know where the gyms were and only then if we had a meet there.

 

[cher062]

Not to take away anything from the caring emotions, no matter the role. FWIW, I don't think being a teacher is the same as being a coach. As a teacher, every student is expected to move on based on a schedule. Coaches can develop an entirely different relationship with their athletes. In fact, in some other cultures coaches are seen as parent figures. Once committed, it was rare in the old days to have a student to leave a coach.

I guess you have to be a teacher to see the similarities. Being a teacher requires more than you might think. Working with special ed students you could have the same child for years. You could be in a school where the teachers move along with the class until they leave the school. There are all types of schools and all types of teaching enviromnents that take longer than 1 year.

 

[gymdog]

Well, as someone who has had teacher-student relationships and coach-gymnast relationships, I don't really think it's the same thing, particularly with high level gymnasts. My gymnastics coaches were closer to family than school teachers. I had to leave a gym (only for a year, went back) due to circumstances and it was devastating. Honestly this is years later and it's still upsetting to me. This is not to detract from teachers but in the general model of one teacher and one grade per year, it's really not the same thing as your gymnastics coach at all. You're not expecting to be moving on to other gyms all the time. That is just not the basis the entire thing is founded on.

 

[cher062]

Well, as someone who has had teacher-student relationships and coach-gymnast relationships, I don't really think it's the same thing, particularly with high level gymnasts. My gymnastics coaches were closer to family than school teachers. I had to leave a gym (only for a year, went back) due to circumstances and it was devastating. Honestly this is years later and it's still upsetting to me. This is not to detract from teachers but in the general model of one teacher and one grade per year, it's really not the same thing as your gymnastics coach at all. You're not expecting to be moving on to other gyms all the time. That is just not the basis the entire thing is founded on.

Well I guess we can agree to disagree here then.

 

[gymnut1]

I am a teacher and a coach. The relationship is way way different.

 

[Blackie6]

Thanks for sharing! I had to change DD's gym last June abruptly due to tuition increase. My DD had been at that gym for 4 yrs and we loved the coach and the families there, it felt like home. It wasn't coaches fault owner got a little greedy and was asking for a lot of money for USAG program that even top gyms in area weren't asking. We settled for similar program less expensive so DD could keep doing what she loved doing. We still miss old coach and hug her every chance we get at meets & still shed tears over not being with her. People leave for many reasons and it is NEVER easy for both parties involved most of the time. Just know that your gymnast (and her family)will probaly never forget you, you sound like a very caring and compassionate coach!

 

[cher062]

I am a teacher and a coach. The relationship is way way different.

as I said before we can agree to disagree on this one as I see lots of similarities.

 

[flip out]

Thanks to those that mentioned the value of a hardworking gymnast!

 

[iluvgym]

The biggest difference between a student/teacher and upper level gymnast/coach relationship is the amount of time most likely spent together outside of the gym - camps, traveling, competitions - many times without parents as once you reach a certain level and are traveling alot it just gets so expensive for the parents to always go as well. Even at a young age if a girl is a tops team member they are used to traveling alone with their coach to camps and such.

The stuff these kids do is scary and dangerous and the girls basically trust their coaches with their lives. All of these experiences lead to the coaches becoming almost like second parents to these kids, very different from their relationships with their teachers at school.

 

[cher062]

The biggest difference between a student/teacher and upper level gymnast/coach relationship is the amount of time most likely spent together outside of the gym - camps, traveling, competitions - many times without parents as once you reach a certain level and are traveling alot it just gets so expensive for the parents to always go as well. Even at a young age if a girl is a tops team member they are used to traveling alone with their coach to camps and such.

The stuff these kids do is scary and dangerous and the girls basically trust their coaches with their lives. All of these experiences lead to the coaches becoming almost like second parents to these kids, very different from their relationships with their teachers at school.

My DD and none of her team mates spend time with coach outside of practice except for a few events arranged by the gym maybe near the end of the year (trip to local amusement park - but parents must attend) and there is no way my DD is going on any meet alone without a parent with just the coach (I've heard too many stories that aren't positive on that front). If we can't have a parent go she isn't going.

In my area I really haven't see that happening at the gyms either even at the upper levels. With the actual school and after school activities she spends at least 2x's the time at school as she does at the gym. So if time is the only measure of a close relationship then it would be greater with her teachers.

But if we are looking at close relationships with adults in charge she is closest to her girl scout leader who she might only be with about an hour or two a week. We have become best friends with her and her family. And they are as closes as any family member I have. She has become like a sister to me and her daughter and my daughter are very close like that too. I can say the same for some of the parents on the gym team too. Can't say the same for the gym coaches or the school teachers.

So it really depends on where you live, your gym, the school, the area you live, and your family dynamics as to what realtionships are closer not just time together.