Parents My Daughter is Afraid of What??

[Empowered]

So I am sure most every mom here would say this, but my daughter is a daredevil... heck that's why she likes gymnastics right?

She's been training L5 since the beginning of the year and she has a meet coming up shortly as we compete a Spring and Fall/Winter season. She really wanted to compete L5 but in order to do so they have to be 3 event ready. They haven't started the FX choreography training yet so that event can't be one of the three so I schedule a private to see about the other three.

Vault - Fine, though not gorgeous her coach has no worries about vault.
Beam - Fine, cartwheel probably only at 75% but consistent enough it seems.

And then she get to bars which is her best event and her coach is like, well let's see how far we get. She kips up all fine and dandy a few times (she is so proud she can kip) so she goes for the connection... Kip, FHC, cast, cast squat on...

She hits the squat on, looks up at the high bar that she's jumped to so many times (just not in combination) and just steps forward off the bar. Her coach looked at her like she was from Mars and says, "You didn't jump". My daughter nods and tries it again... This time she stands up and steps forward off the bar with one arm out with this look of death on her face.

They move to a different bar and she does just cast squat on jump offs for about ten minutes, they're fine... Heck she's had that skill for months... She moves back to the real bars and again, no jumping - just complete panic. Her coach looks at me and says, "she can do all the hard stuff, we just gotta get her to the high bar..."

After about 20 minutes and only actually grabbing the high bar once (with no swing to kip) we decide to go home for the day and my daughter has a complete nervous breakdown in the car. Apparently she is just terrified of jumping to the high bar out of the cast squat on and now feels like she blew all chances of ever being a level 5 (she's a little dramatic for sure)...

Has anyone else's daughter feared this skill?

 

[ZJsMom]

My dd never feared this one (she's had plenty of other fears though), but it is common. Her best friend when she was training level 5 became so afraid of it, when coach said "it's time to go to bars," she would start crying. With all fears, I think time and repetition are what's needed to overcome it. I think the best thing as a parent is to try to take the pressure off and express your confidence.

 

[starmaker]

You are right I do consider my dd to be quite the daredevil. She too has been jumping to high bar for some time now. I remember at her old gym just for fun they would spot her jump to high bar and she would just GO for it. Sometimes she was not even close (she was even smaller then) and coach would catch her mid air and she thought it was the most fun ever.

DD is now in the same boat as your dd. She's been training L5/6 since Jan. and out of no where is terrified of jumping to high bar. She claims the bars are really far apart. There are some really tall girls in her team and coach says it difficult to find a happy medium. I've seen her do it a few times this week with a spot and a terrified look on her face. When she goes for it, she almost always makes it. I am guessing with time and confidence she will overcome it.

DD can be a bit dramatic too! She was like.....maybe I want to do L4 again, maybe I only want to do TOPS etc.? She's been avoiding L5 bars at all cost. Luckily I think it's getting better (atleast this week it is)

 

[gym law mom]

Jumping to the high bar was one skill my gymmie didn't have fear issues with(believe there have been many others). Has your dd actually done full bar routine run throughs in practice before this private? If she hasn't been working on connecting her low bar to high bar then this could just be a shock for her now trying to do it to move up. If she's been doing full routines in the past without a problem, then you might want to speak with the coach about moving the bars closer, putting a mat under the high bar, standing close for "psychological spotting" etc.

Many times you see girls just start balking on skills out of nowhere right before meet season starts or its move up time. I think alot is pressure they put on themselves and the stress of doing a new level.

Check out Dr. Ali's site at headgames.com---you may find some helpful reading material for both dd and you.

 

[Empowered]

This would have been her first ever full run through. She had done the front half of the routine with a squat on jump off in class. She has also done the second half in privates but it was on a different bar where she jumps from a block to the high bar and moves through the second half of the routine.

They haven't actually trained the cast squat on jump to high bar in class yet as they seem to really want the girls to get the kips down first. They work the cast squat on jump off and a couple times they have worked the jump to high bar, but with the girls putting one leg up and getting set and balanced and then moving to a tuck and jumping.

It was something about the actual skill connection that freaked her out I guess. I know it will come in time and her real L5 season doesn't start until fall so she has plenty of time, it was just such a shocker to see her scared.

 

[snowbound]

You are definitely not alone there. There are two girls in my DD's L5 group that are petrified at the thought of catching the high bar. For one it didn't even seem to be the jump part, she would jump for all she was worth, but as soon as she felt the bar in her hand she would let go, like she was afraid her arms were going to rip out or something.

don't know what to tell you other than have patience, this too shall pass

Snowbound

 

[Megley]

Snowbound, I think their fear is of peeling off the bar. To the original poster, this is a really common fear. My dd did not suffer from it herself, but at least three other girls in her L5 training group have. They all got over it eventually. It just takes time and repetition. Some things that help are piling lots of mats under the high bar and spotting from the coach until they feel comfortable with the jump and get confidence that they won't peel off. If there's a second set of bars that can be set closer, that might help as well.

 

[pixie flips]

It must be a common fear as there are a couple of girls in Pixie's group that are afraid of it as well. In fact the other little girl, that was kept back in L4 again this season with Pixie, was kept back for her fear of jumping to high bar. She's getting better at it though. Hopefully your DD will get past this soon. I'm sending lots of good wishes her way

 

[marie83]

I have one gymnast who really struggles with this too.
If she was allowed to she would just sit in her squat position on the low bar for as long as she could manage before just 'plopping' off the bar with no attempt to catch.

What I've found works is to forbid her from staying on the bar for more than a second, she literally has to squat on jump off straight away. The more she stays on the low bar, the more she starts to freak herself out. She knows that I would rather see her squat on jump off than squat on and spend 5 mins looking at the high bar!

When it is her turn to work with me, I do loads of squat on catches with support, again, straight away, no stopping to re-adjust grip or feet! Each time we do it, I do less, but she doesn't really realise that!

I am actually quite tough on her though, and she knows that although she is scared and I appreciate that, she also has to really be brave and go for it because she is having lots of support. Although this might sound harsh I have found it is a good way to get over fears.
(I have worked with this gymnast for 4 years though so we have a good relationship - she knows I wouldn't ask her to do something I didn't know she could do I know how her mind is working too!)

We go through this a couple of times a year and it does take a while for her to get over it, but with lots of patience she does get there! Each time she gets the catch on her own again I hope it will be the final time we go through the mental blocks, but they do keep recurring!

Good luck, I'm sure she'll get there!

 

[mariposa]

It is pretty common. With some patience and help from her coaches, she will get through it. Better to not pressure her to get it and let her have the time she needs to work through it. If she gets pushed too much, she will get an even worse fear about it and it will be worse. She has lots of time until Fall season to get past this and really get her confidence on this event. Good luck to her. Sending bar fairies for her!!

 

[mom2kazkids]

Are you sure that is not my daughter that you are talking about? She has gone practices and has completely refused to do it. Part of it stemmed back to this summer when she first started doing it and ended up peeling off the high bar because she got to over confidnent. We then in October did a private, and she was getting better. Fall level 4 season ended in early December, then it was all onto level 5 for the winter season. She was ever so close to being put back down to a level 4 due to not jumping. Her coaches would keep her after practice nearly 45 minutes to get her to jump. One night she jumped and grabbed the bar 10 times herself in under 3 minutes, next night no way in you know what would she do it. Finally because she is about a head shorter than most of the other girls, they finally moved the bars in to the point that she could lean to get to the high bar. Her tap swings were good enough that she would not hit the low bar on the back swing. Slowly they have been moving the bars out. She has completed 3 level 5 meets, and does better in the meets than practice, but even this week in practice on Tuesday she was told to get down because she would not jump. She is hot and cold with it still.

The first meet that she did as a level 5 was in Cancun, she was out of the gym for a week before she competed due to travel and such. During the warm up I seriously thought that she would not jump. I think that her minute warm up was spent just looking at the bar, but she did eventually do it. Between her 2 and 3rd level 5 meets, she spent the last 15minutes of practice in tears because she refused to do her bar routine because the coaches were not standing right in the middle of the bars.

Oh this is also the child that before the bars are moved in will do her low bar, squat on and block off the high bar a million times, even on the nights that she refuses to jump to the bar when they are moved in. Her jumping and blocking looks good, but she will just not grab due to the fear of peeling off.

Can your daughter's coaches start to move the bars in so she can lean at first, then slowly move them out? That is what seems to have gotten mine over the hump.

Here is her bars from the last meet that we were at, as you can see she does just throw her self at the bar, her coaches are trying to get her to work on standing on the bar then jumping.

YouTube - 2010 Chicago Style Meet Level 5 bars

Also how old is your daughter, mine just turned 9.

Barb

 

[gymnut1]

Are you sure that is not my daughter that you are talking about? She has gone practices and has completely refused to do it. Part of it stemmed back to this summer when she first started doing it and ended up peeling off the high bar because she got to over confidnent. We then in October did a private, and she was getting better. Fall level 4 season ended in early December, then it was all onto level 5 for the winter season. She was ever so close to being put back down to a level 4 due to not jumping. Her coaches would keep her after practice nearly 45 minutes to get her to jump. One night she jumped and grabbed the bar 10 times herself in under 3 minutes, next night no way in you know what would she do it. Finally because she is about a head shorter than most of the other girls, they finally moved the bars in to the point that she could lean to get to the high bar. Her tap swings were good enough that she would not hit the low bar on the back swing. Slowly they have been moving the bars out. She has completed 3 level 5 meets, and does better in the meets than practice, but even this week in practice on Tuesday she was told to get down because she would not jump. She is hot and cold with it still.

The first meet that she did as a level 5 was in Cancun, she was out of the gym for a week before she competed due to travel and such. During the warm up I seriously thought that she would not jump. I think that her minute warm up was spent just looking at the bar, but she did eventually do it. Between her 2 and 3rd level 5 meets, she spent the last 15minutes of practice in tears because she refused to do her bar routine because the coaches were not standing right in the middle of the bars.

Oh this is also the child that before the bars are moved in will do her low bar, squat on and block off the high bar a million times, even on the nights that she refuses to jump to the bar when they are moved in. Her jumping and blocking looks good, but she will just not grab due to the fear of peeling off.

Can your daughter's coaches start to move the bars in so she can lean at first, then slowly move them out? That is what seems to have gotten mine over the hump.

Here is her bars from the last meet that we were at, as you can see she does just throw her self at the bar, her coaches are trying to get her to work on standing on the bar then jumping.

YouTube - 2010 Chicago Style Meet Level 5 bars

Also how old is your daughter, mine just turned 9.

Barb

This is exactly my dd too. Has been doing it 2 years, peeled off badly a year ago and now just the same as your dd. Will squat on stand jump tap but wont grab. She does it in meets by throwing herself at it but this is not a long term solution. Although she fell when the bars were out she now wont even do it when the bars are in. She is also just nine and cannot compete again until it is sorted. It is very common.

 

[kimmy4]

My advice is to just remember that "fear is irrational". Sometimes there is absolutely no "logic" to it, it just happens. Your daugther is capable of jumping to high bar and will do it in time. I know it is hard to be patient. I would not try to over-analyze this situation. It will pass and she will be doing the L5 bars routine when she is ready. She will likely come out of this stronger than before and even more confident in her L5 bar routine. Best of Luck.

 

[Panda-girl's Mom]

I have not had any issus with daughter jumping to high bar she likes it but one of her teammates had issues. Daughter told her friend stop dancing on the bar and hesistating as soon as you get your squat on she told her jump right away. My daughter says this has helped her friend with the skill. Sometimes the kids are better at understanding the fear than the coaches or parents. It makes sense the longer they hestitate the more fear builds up.

 

[gymnut1]

I have not had any issus with daughter jumping to high bar she likes it but one of her teammates had issues. Daughter told her friend stop dancing on the bar and hesistating as soon as you get your squat on she told her jump right away. My daughter says this has helped her friend with the skill. Sometimes the kids are better at understanding the fear than the coaches or parents. It makes sense the longer they hestitate the more fear builds up.

this works if it is the jump they are scared of - not if it is the catching bit that bothers them.