Parents I learned a lot this past weekend....

[gymmom14]

My dd got sick on Wednesday and was on the couch Friday and Sat on and off sleeping and not eating. She had one of her favorite meets on Sunday. She woke up Sun am and said there is no way she can compete. I felt so bad for her. Then the longer she was up the better she started to feel. I told her we can go to them meet and she could try and warm up and see how she felt. If she did not feel good, she would be the team cheerleader. Anyway, we stopped for lunch and she looked bad, couldn't eat and was cold. I gave her motrin and thought no way would she compete.

She warmed up and did not look great, but did OK. They started on floor (which I thought the endurance would kill her) but she did a nice routine 9.075. They vault 8.875, not bad for her. Then the dreaded bars/giant. Warm up was rough, kept falling on the squat on. She did a very nice routine 8.1, her highest score to date by far. She was thrilled. Then to beam her favorite event. She has been working the bwo/bhs this week at gym and was going to try it. She connected it!!! She also did her fwo and a tick tock bwo just to be sure on the connection and got 9.125. Overall, her best meet to date!

Now here is what I learned..... gymnastics makes me crazy! My dd was the 2nd highest aa on our team and she did not place on any event. She was in a crazy tough age group. (38.8 was 1st place). But many of her teammates placed with 8.6 on beam etc. I know she was disappointed and we had the whole talk about how medals don't matter. But it is hard to explain how kids with much lower scores got the bling and she had a rock star day and got nothing. I was really so proud of her. I wish success wasn't judged by where you place. Not by our gym, but by the world in general. It just seems like getting a medal validates that you had a good day!! But, she is such a struggler on bars, went 4 for 4 on her routines. I am so happy for her.

Boy, this got long.... sorry for the rant!
If you want to see her video, just PM me! (yes, I am a proud mama!)

 

[bogwoppit]

Ha!!! It bites to score so well and get nothing, but in such an arbitrary sport nothing saurpises me anymore!

We always say in our house that it doesn't seem to matter how bad you do as long as you get a medal because then you think you did great. THough medals here are so rare they should bring them in a security truck!

I was just looking at some local results last night and the girls who qualified to provincials in one level age 15-18's scores were considerably lower than the 12-14 year old group, therfore it was easier to qualify at the older age group. Fair I don't think so , but it is reality. It all comes down to how they break down the age groups. Here they are set in stone and never change, but it seems in the US they change at every meet. I can imagine that would be frustrating for a child and parent.

The whole medal thing is why I have worked on goal setting with my girls, it has changed the way they look at competitions completely as now their eye is on a more personal prize. We also have some very funny insider jokes that put a smile on their faces. Some of them too rude to share here, but they tend to involve judges!!! I think in order to save your sanilty it is good to find your own slant for meets or they just get caught up in winning, or losing.

I guess I would've made her skip the meet, especially if she said she didn't think she could do it. BUt she did do well to compete all 4 with no real issues. Hope she is feeling better now. COngratulations on surviving the meet!

Ranting is just fine, thats what this place is great for. If I ranted about gym to my "normal" friends they would have me carted off to the lunatic asylum!

 

[gymmom14]

Thanks Bog, I knew a lot of folks would understand. Just wanted to add after reading my post, I meant on offense to her teammates that got medals with lower scores. We have been on the plus side of that before. Also, once she was up for a bit Sunday she decided she wanted to go since she felt better.

Again, she did great, her personal best, and that is what matters!!!!

 

[bogwoppit]

That is no offense to any team member , it sucks when two girls get the same score and one gets a gold and the other goes home empty handed! I have seen it happen and I have seen the confused looks on the parents faces, it just doesn't make sense in the moment,

Glad she is feeling better.

 

[gymjourneymom]

I am sooooo proud of your DD!!!! It is so hard when others don't understand the whole age group thing. Or that your DD did AMAZING, but was just in a tough age group. I totally get what you are saying & so will the other optional parents on here. We understand what a feat connecting her beam series was, WTG!!! She did wonderful, especially for competing while feeling under the weather.

Just wanted to validate your feelings! You are not crazy, you are correct...it's not fair that "medals" seem to the indicator of a successful meet to some. But those of us who REALLY understand the situation, we KNOW what the REAL indicators of success are. And this exact scenerio is one of the things that makes me crazy about this sport too.

But as long as your DD truely KNOWS that she did an amazing job, that is all that matters. Metals are nice...but they are only a small part of this sport in the long run. It's the personal drive, determination & satisfaction that REALLY matter & keep the girls returning to the gym day after day.

A HUGE CONGRATULATIONS to your DD from someone who 'gets it'! Keep up the good work!!!!

 

[ValleyGymMom]

Wow! Nice scores for being sick! Too bad about the placements. Doesn't seem right.
I have been to meets where awards were given for extra things...for instance, best recovery after a mistake, best landing, walking away after a hard fall, best "first time try" at something. The list goes on, but it allows some recognition for the girls who stand out or overcome some obstacle. Like yours!

 

[mariposa]

Wow! Congrats to her on her best meet yet! Especially since she was just recovering from being sick. That sucks that her best meet left her feeling sad. This sport definitely has it's share of those moments. I think our girls do learn from them, but it is tough.

The age group/medals/lower scores medaling in different age groups is frustrating for sure. I know that it is hard for them. Like Bog said, trying to get them to not focus on those medals is the key, but it is tough. Especially when they are younger I think, but even the older ones as they actually see that they had higher scores than teammates, but didn't place, etc. I try to point out to Abby when her teammates have a great meet and then don't place. I want her to know that it can happen to her someday as well as for her to make sure to be humble when she gets a medal, because truly, a teammate could have done a better routine than her and not received one in their age group. Hard to teach for sure.

Sometimes I think her not placing was easier for me as a parent to deal with, I could just comfort her and tell her she did her best, point out those personal bests, etc. With placing and winning, I worry about making sure she will be a gracious winner and also be able to be gracious when she doesn't win at the next meet, wanting her to make sure to comfort and congratulate those that didn't medal because she has been there, etc.

 

[Pickle's Mom]

Gymnastics makes me crazy too. This weekend was Pickle's L4 Sectionals. She had her personal best AA, and PBs on vault and beam. In any other age group she would have been 1 or 2. Her age group just had really tough competition.

Congrats to your daughter on performing so well, even though she was sick. We had two girls just getting over stomache flu at Sectionals this weekend. Neither did as well as I've seen them do, but both qualified for States.

 

[momofagymmie]

Congratulations! How wonderful and sick and all. I wonder if when a gymnast is under the weather then all she does on the meet is focus on what has to be done not on what might happen etc. Freeing her mind for a great meet? Reading way too much into it but anyway what a great result!

We've struggled with the scores for age groups all year. My dd is in the older age group and has benefited a few times from the lower scores in her groups. Some meets she couldn't believe she made it on the podium. Meanwhile her teammate who is in the younger age group has on occasion scored higher and not gotten on the podium. In the end my dd knows when she's had a good meet regardless of the meet results. (she's older now & is learning some perspective) Still it's tough cause you don't want to take the joy away from her but yet feel the pain of the teammate..... Tough tough sport our kids have chosen to do..
I can't tell you how many times i find myself wishing it were tennis she chose.. If the ball is out you lose the point how easy is that!??? Still great job for your dd!

 

[cathiann]

Oh yeah! Beth's in the toughest age group too and consistently either places lower or doesn't place at all--when teammates with lower scores take 1st or do really well. It's tough for her, but she's gotten to understand it's just how it is!

 

[gymmom14]

To Momofagymmie: I have been wondering the same thing.... what is the psychology of competing when sick? So many people have told me theid dd has had their best meet when they were sick. Do they take the pressure of doing well off themselves, do they concentrate harder, do they just shut their mind off and let their bodies do what it knows, does not having any expectations make them relax? There has to be something to this.....

 

[Mill09]

I have noticed the same thing. My son is an an extremely competitive age group and usually only places on vault (got 3rd at state this past weekend!) So I was so excited this weekend when he got he stayed on the pommel horse and got his best score ever....he literally fell to his knees in celebration when he saw his score....it was still next to last place, but for him it was a victory......

 

[momofagymmie]

Gymom14, i do think there is something to being a little off your game for whatever reason and then to have a really great meet. Maybe the gymnast puts less stress on herself to do well because it's already a victory to just be able to attend and compete. So they feel like a winner already and then maybe that's what carries them through??