Parents What happens when people leave your gym?

[LMV]

Do you have a farewell party?
Does this depend on what the circumstances of the departure are?
If you do have a party, is it held at the gym?


No, we are not pulling our daughter out of her gym. The disgruntled mom of one of the girls sort of on the L7 team is switching her child to another team. She will be leaving at the end of this month and is even more disgruntled that we have not arranged a farewell party for her child yet. Our girls are the same age so I feel like maybe I should do something but I’m not sure exactly what. I really do wish her and her child all the best because why would I do anything else? Any ideas?

 

[gymmomntc2e6]

Never heard of that, unless they were moving. We have not had many leave, but only one had a party and she was moving 3/4 of the way across the country. Seems odd that she has told everyone she is leaving and is staying through the end of the month. What I have seen is they either just don't come back or they come in to tell HC that they are leaving and are done at that point.

Maybe it's just me but expecting a party seems bizarre.

 

[LMV]

-She is switching to the one other gym in our expanded area which is about thirty minutes away. They did end up at our gym about a year ago [before it was really our gym actually] when they did move across the country due to the husband/father's job change which required relocating.
-She was probably paying quarterly tuition and the quarter will end at the end of this month.
-The decision to switch gyms has been brewing for several months and is probably the best option at this point because the mother is frustrated and disgruntled and the child at least doesn't appear to be happy.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Do you have a farewell party?
Does this depend on what the circumstances of the departure are?
If you do have a party, is it held at the gym?


No, we are not pulling our daughter out of her gym. The disgruntled mom of one of the girls sort of on the L7 team is switching her child to another team. She will be leaving at the end of this month and is even more disgruntled that we have not arranged a farewell party for her child yet. Our girls are the same age so I feel like maybe I should do something but I’m not sure exactly what. I really do wish her and her child all the best because why would I do anything else? Any ideas?

tell HER to hold HER OWN farewell party! geesh...she's the one leaving... not you and your daughter.

 

[LMV]

Dunno,

You have to keep in mind that I'm pretty gym-mom clueless so I really have no idea what is appropriate. Maybe I'll just invite them to join us for dinner after practice one night next week.

 

[Monkeygirlsmom]

we have farewell parties for the kids who are moving to Highschool gymnastics (and even then its just getting some cookies for them and wishing them well, and for coaches who leave on good terms)

I can see if a child moves away and all but just to chang gyms NO WAY

 

[bogwoppit]

I have had both my dd's leave gym this year on very good terms. No party, no gifts, no big farewell. Hugs from the coach and lots of love. That's it, that's all! I never expected anything else. That mom needs to get a GRIP!

 

[3rd_time_around]

Nope! No farewell parties for someone leaving because they're not happy. Only if they are moving or graduating, and even then we have only had very small dinner parties at a restaurant. Don't worry about it. Wish them well and let that be it. It is actually very awkward when someone leaves that way. you see them at a meet, you don't know what to say or how to act. To expect a party is absurd!

 

[gym law mom]

Usually when a girl leaves to go to another gym, they just come in on the last night of practice and say goodbye----if that much. Only time I've ever seen a party was when a girl was moving due to dad being reassigned in the military(and she threw the party herself) or a senior graduating and then something special is done at the end of the year team banquet.
In this instance if you and your dd are good friends with this girl and her mom and want to do something outside of the gym, thats fine, but you are not obligated to have a little farewell for her---actually it could be rather awkward considering the circumstances.

 

[Aussie_coach]

I have never heard of a gym having a farewell party for a gymnast who is leaving. Generally if a kids leaves the gym they are either stopping gymnastics or moving to another gym, why would that be cause for celebration.

 

[Optionals United]

Normally we will end practice 15 minutes or so early and have a little party. The person leaving brings cookies,or brownies, and we just have a good time spending a couple minutes together on the last day. Sometimes if it is someone you are really close to they will make her a card or something. Nothing huge just a little good-bye that doesnt interupt practice to much but makes them feel loved.

 

[emorymom]

Well at first I thought, "Maybe she's been at that gym for 10 years." But one year?

Hey, organize a potluck at a house, preferably hers. Or just tell her you hope they will get the girls together regularly outside of gym.

 

[nevertooold]

If the mom is disgruntled and the child is unhappy...

Maybe you should have a little party AFTER they are gone.

 

[marie83]

If a gymnast leaves us because they are moving to the other side of the country/world, then we do get them a present - usually everyone chips in and we get them something like a teddy bear, big bar of chocolate, a photo frame with a pic of their team Mates etc. Everyone signs a card too. If they are leaving to go to another local gym we don't do anything - they have hugs and goodbyes from everyone but no party or gifts. We also do gifts for coaches who are leaving to go to uni, or who have to move far away.

 

[mariposa]

Usually no parties around these parts unless they are moving or something.

When we took our daughter out of her old gym to switch her to another gym, we tried to do it as quietly as possible. When a child leaves a gym, it usually creates drama for the gym, others questioning "why" and if they should do the same. We wrote a letter to owner and one to coaches briefly explaining why we were taking her to a different gym and she didn't tell anyone until the day she went in to give the letters and say goodbye.

Never would I have expected a party for her, that is just weird.

 

[bpatient]

Kids who leave during the year may bring something (typically a treat for their teammates) to the gym on their last night, and each athlete who left the team during the year—for whatever reason—is celebrated at the end-of-the-year party and given a nice 8x10â€￾ action photo and some kind words from the coaches in recognition of the fact that mastering a mill circle or conquering the fear of a back handspring can be as significant an accomplishment as placing at regionals. The members of the parents club try to make it a big deal (with a lot of help from the team dad who takes and prints those photos), and to ensure that each kid understands that his or her efforts have been noted and appreciated.

 

[3rd_time_around]

Kids who leave during the year may bring something (typically a treat for their teammates) to the gym on their last night, and each athlete who left the team during the year—for whatever reason—is celebrated at the end-of-the-year party and given a nice 8x10” action photo and some kind words from the coaches in recognition of the fact that mastering a mill circle or conquering the fear of a back handspring can be as significant an accomplishment as placing at regionals. The members of the parents club try to make it a big deal (with a lot of help from the team dad who takes and prints those photos), and to ensure that each kid understands that his or her efforts have been noted and appreciated.

That is very nice, but a child that leaves in the middle of the year, not at the end of the season, is usually disgruntled and it is not a pleasant thing. Very strange to send them off with a party or gifts, because there is usually a lot of drama and quite often hard feelings towards someone.

 

[sportyspice]

Our gymnasts just disappear - here one day, gone the next. A party, really? Who wants to throw a party for someone who is unhappy and does not like the gym? If they don't want to be there, then leave, negative energy is not welcome in our gym!

 

[bpatient]

That is very nice, but a child that leaves in the middle of the year, not at the end of the season, is usually disgruntled and it is not a pleasant thing. Very strange to send them off with a party or gifts, because there is usually a lot of drama and quite often hard feelings towards someone.

It's important to avoid confusing the actions of parents with the actions of their children. The kids on dd's team and the kids who have left dd's team have generally been genuinely nice children who enjoyed gymnastics, put a lot into it, and got a lot out of it. They deserve credit and support. Those kids who left in the middle of the year and then returned to enjoy the end of the year awards ceremony have seemed happy to catch up with their old teammates, and the parents work hard to make sure that we keep the focus on the kids rather than on any parent-centered gym drama.

 

[cher062]

At old gym when we left along with 4 others to go to new gyms there was a cake, a card and a poster the girls made for each girl. The other parents chipped in for the cake and drinks and it was at the last 15 min or so of their last day. Nothing really big. I think it depends too on how close you are with the other parents and gymnastis. We had been there for ever and were and are still friends with parents and gymnasts at old gym.