The intrigue of being "the Youngest"...

[MdGymMom01]

After reading some threads and parenting articles that have been floating around the web, a friend of mine and I were talking about the fact that nowadays it seems like "being the youngest" in any given sport, activity, or situation is all the rage. It's not so much that a child is good at a particular sport or is a great student or good at reading or math, but now the emphasis is on how young they are. Has anyone else noticed this growing phenomenon?

 

[Bella's Mom]

Bella is usually the youngest in her class but now there are two girls younger than her and I'm actually kind of glad. She has friends to talk to her own age. Another issue we have is that Bella does lack some maturity and focus and so the older girls get annoyed with her.

I do NOT see it as a positive thing to always be the youngest. It certainly isn't indicative of future performance. Bella was the youngest but she isn't the strongest gymnast. And even though she was more advanced when she was younger, at this point, most of her age group has caught up with her and many have even surpassed her.

I think parents who are proud that their kids are the youngest are just hoping that they have a little prodigy on their hands.....

 

[Coacharella]

Exactly. It's the child prodigy notion.

If my kid is THIS talented at age 6, where will she be at age 10 ? What these parents (and also come coaches) don't always keep in mind is that talent evens out and late starters catch up and progress slows down sometimes. Plainly put, not every amazing 6 year old grows into an amazing 16 year old.

 

[NGL780309]

I'd have to agree with you Bella's mom that having a kid that is always the youngest is certainly not always good thing. Sure you are proud of your child, just as you would be at any age, but there are plenty of negatives. Most of the time I find myself wishing she wasn't always the youngest on her team. There may be an assumption on some people's part from the outside looking in that we as parents think our child is some prodigy and that may be true of some parents, but not all parents. For most of us we are just letting our child do what they enjoy and it can't be helped if they are above average skill-wise for their age. Why does age matter anyway? When I go to a gymnastics meet I don't care how old or young a gymnast is. I'm only looking at what qualities they have as a gymnast. Is it impressive if you see a tiny little thing doing really awesome gymnastics? Of course because it's unexpected. I think there is just a bit more of a wow factor when you see a young child doing anything above what is considered normal for other kids their age. As to this being a new trend? I'd saybsolutely not.

 

[NGL780309]

Exactly. It's the child prodigy notion.

If my kid is THIS talented at age 6, where will she be at age 10 ? What these parents (and also come coaches) don't always keep in mind is that talent evens out and late starters catch up and progress slows down sometimes. Plainly put, not every amazing 6 year old grows into an amazing 16 year old.

And some average 6 year olds turn into amazing 16 year olds.

 

[Blackie6]

When my first was born, I experienced this "firsts race" right away. There were friends whose kids talked first, was potty trained, ate solids first, first, walked first, ect...it was pretty comical at the time. A close friend of mine had a DD about same age, 3 months older to be exact. When our kids hit pre-school age she was in a battle at her job's daycare for her DD to be placed in all day in Kindergarten to "beat" out the rest of the group back in the town's Pre K. I often listened to the tales of how she was reading and writting in her journal and was on a 1st grade reading level & mom was so happy she won the battle to get her into Kindergarten early! So my son goes to Kindergarten finally and it is only half day, but he loves it! Gets all his HW done in poacket on first day, loves to play and show-n-tell. He is not at all about the bussiness. By 3rd grade, the teachers and principal are asking him to try harder on the state test, he doesn't write enough and they can't get a clear picture of his test grade even. Friends daughter is miserable in school because her mom wanted to make sure she had a "serious" teacher so made sure she requested the teacher all the kids hated! Fast forward to Middle School and HS so I don't bore you, my son receved Math Awards and Silver award for GPA and high proficiency on state tests, he is in all accelerated classes now, and friend's daughter is miserable and hates school and hates that her mom pushed her. She maybe going to Summer school.

My own DD started gymnastics at 5, ok, early, LOL, but has repeated 4 twice, 5 twice, maybe even will do 6 twice...who cares as long as she is going at the pace SHE wants to go at!

Moral of the story? Life is not about the race, it's about the adventure, the ride...kids are hard enough on themselves, be the parent, the cheerleader, the supporter...without the pushing!!

 

[NOG]

Blackie6 - that is a beautiful story! Thank you so much for sharing

 

[lilgymmie7]

DD has also been the youngest on her teams. And as her Mom, I can attest to the fact that it has NOT given me the idea ,"...that I might have a child prodigy." I have had to look out for DD in respect to what she may hear from her older teammates and then take to school. As a preschooler, she was developing some " Mean Girl" tactics. She was often excluded at first when she was placed on the level 4 and then 5 teams. She thought being a "mean girl" was okay because that's how she was treated. When I was approached by her then teacher, I had to reflect on where some of her behaviors may have derived from.
DD has had to deal with her share of jealousy, and again I have had to talk with her about how to handle herself and those around her. As she progressed, she also had to learn how NOT to be the 'baby' of the team. That was the hardest for her. That was one of the reasons I had to move her. Some older teammates loved DD like she was their own little sister, and these same girls coddled her probably too much. Her old coaches thought that she wasn't maturing enough as they had expected her to. They also began to call her a follower. That was enough for me to say I had to find another place for her. The coaches mentality did not match what I or her school teachers saw in DD.
Again at her new gym DD is the youngest, but you would never know it. There are a lot of little 'shorties' that look just like her. She had to go into this new gym with the mentality that she has to "work hard." Thus far, she has done that. I am very impressed with her maturity and her hard work ethics. If she is a child prodigy, isn't every kid great at something? I just hope she figures out what she is good at for HERSELF! It won't mean a 'darn' if she doesn't love what she does and does it for herself.

 

[AlexsGymmyMom]

Blackie6, I could have written that myself. I remember having all the moms talking about the 1st everything! At the end of the day who cares who could read the declaration of independance in preschool? My oldest didn't walk til he was 14 months old and guess what? To this day he does not resent me for not making him walk sooner! Kids do however resent being pushed to do something that they don't really WANT to do!! Just my 2 cents!

 

[mom2mini]

My daughter also has always been the youngest this coupled with the fact that she is very petite is not always a good thing. The older/taller girls want to carry her around, she doesn't have much in common with the older girls, etc. I am relieved that there will be a child younger than her joining the team this year.

 

[bar princess's mom]

I have to agree with some of the other posts. In our personal experience, being the youngest isn't always the best. My DD was the youngest on her team last year and the youngest competing at states this year. She is the child that hit every one of the milestones early. It was hard for her because she was more advanced than kids her age but not mature enough to hang with the big kids. It was also hard on mom and dad since she was being exposed to the older girls at gym and she is now 6 going on 10 or 12. The kids her age are finally starting to catch up in both school and gym and she is starting to make friends her own age. We actually kept her back in Level 4 for this coming season so she could be with kids her own age.

 

[lhmom]

I think that the fascination with "the youngest" has been around for quite a long time. A gymnastics example: Olga Korbut in 1972, then Nadia Comaneci-both youngsters. There is something about young prodigies that seems to grab people's attention. DD was the youngest on her team last year and instead of feeling like she was some sort of prodigy, I worried whether she was actually ready to compete. I think she wasn't happy about being the youngest either because when the new girls moved up, she was excited that there would be girls younger than her.

 

[gym monkeys mom]

Ok so I have read all the posts about the youngest kids on team and I do not doubt its not all roses.

If being the youngest is not all its cracked up to seem like.....then why do people insist on posting childs age???

That is what I wonder.

 

[lhmom]

Ok so I have read all the posts about the youngest kids on team and I do not doubt its not all roses.

If being the youngest is not all its cracked up to seem like.....then why do people insist on posting childs age???

That is what I wonder.

Well, I did because when I first started posting here, I noticed that others did. Doing this, I connected with other parents who had kids in the same age range. Not once did it run through my head that it might be construed as bragging.

 

[Tumblequeensmom]

MdGymMom01, I have definitely noticed that as well. I think Blackie summed it up quite nicely!!! The whole "child prodigy" thing is so rampant in our society nowadays. I never understood the people who have posted their child's videos along w/their age anyway.... Will they continue to do that if Suzie is now a 12 year old Level 8??? Or maybe that doesn't sound as impressive as a 7 year old L8? (child prodigy thing again) Along these same lines did everyone already read the articles MaryA and Bog linked to in a different thread?

Also, as other posters have said, it's NOT always best to be the youngest in a group. I can't imagine that the little ones would not feel a bit isolated if they're the only young ones in the group. The ages in my DD's training group range from 9 to 16. Most are between 12 and 16, with only the one being 9 years old. She IS tiny too. Of course the older girls treat her like a baby sister and they love her to pieces. But I always wonder how she really feels when they're talking about school dances, the dreaded "Justin Bieber" and boys in general.

 

[Bella's Mom]

I think my siggy still has B's age..... I posted because it gives me a chance to reach out to parents who have gymmies approximately my child's age. I think that I can relate more to parents who also have 7YOs and if they happen to be training for L4 as well, then great. But even if they are more advanced, there is still a general development that other parents of 7YOs can relate to and maybe help me out with advice.

But obviously, a 7YO at L4 isn't really a prodigy so maybe that's why I don't feel like it's bragging to do so.

 

[DND]

I think that there may be people who post age/levels that are looking for understanding or advice from people who are in a similar situation. Or if they are not in that situation may offer perspective that relates to the age and level the child is.

For myself I have found that having no gymnastics background I have joined this forum to seek advice of those with knowledge that I just do not have. I know quite often I am unsure of certain decisions or choices and as I do have a young daughter I really appreciate the opportunity to consider others opinions and advice. I will use her age and level as I feel that those offering suggestions need that information to be able to give you appropriate answers.

Quite often there may be different reasons that a child may be the youngest in particular situations and it is not always the ideal, but rather the only means to keep the child in what she loves.

Just my opinion!

 

[MaryA]

I don't think posting your child's age necessarily has anything to do with bragging about how advanced your child is. My child is an old woman in gymnast years... 10-years-old and ONLY a level 5-training-6! I think, as Bella's mom says, posting your child's age on this site give you a chance to reach out to parents who have kids the same age. However, definitely I think that wanting your child to be the youngest in his/her level or grade or whatever grows out of wanting your child to be advanced, and as others have said, it goes back to infanthood... when did your child hold up his/her head? Smile? Crawl? Walk? Potty-train? Even though none of those things have ever been shown to correlate with whether or not you child gets into an ivy league college, parents seem to want to attribute such things to their "advanced" child. It's like that article I posted at the end of the week last week... parents don't want to think their child is "average." They have to be either gifted, or learning disabled, or both. Of course, every child is special to Mom and Dad, and that's how it should be. It's when we start comparing our child to every other kid that we start getting into trouble.

 

[NewtoGym]

And some average 6 year olds turn into amazing 16 year olds.

Here's hoping!!! lol

 

[exgymnastmomx3]

Have to agree with the group that being the youngest hasn't been an advantage for my youngest dd. In most levels she's been in, it's the hardest age group to medal in, as a lot of those young phenoms are in those young age groups. She's always been at a higher level gymnastics wise than most of the same girls her age in the gyms we've been at, so has had to train with older girls. In December I requested that she be moved off of the 9/10 team and be moved to the 7/8 team. We are in a small gym and there was only my dd and one other along with mostly 14,15,16, and 17 yr. olds. My dd was 11 and the other one was 10. The average age in the 7/8 group is 11. MUCH better fit. Settings easier too!